Investment Banking is Divine

Thirty years of intense reflection to arrive at one fixed yet inspiring truth: investment banking is the only path to salvation. As an MD at a top BB (think exactly J.P. Morgan), I’ve realized that all too often I overlook the simple beauties in life like the polished shoes, the numb client conversations, the analyst makeup job that screams top bucket, and the fat Patek on my wrist that roars in power (before you ask, yes, it’s Grand Complications). Meanwhile, every other aspect of my life is characterized by the lack of this beauty. A while back I heard the saying “What punishments of God are not gifts?” I really love the idea of gifts.

To get argumentative, if banking is the Mecca of life’s beauty, and if God exists, it must be that banking is God’s chosen path. In other words, one cannot truly experience the connection to God without walking along this material bridge that connects earth to heaven. It logically makes sense, but it becomes theologically meaningful when experienced. Just the other day, a first-year analyst sent me a deck at 4:12 a.m. Every logo was aligned. Every footnote matched. I stared at it for a long time, then  replied simply: "Thoughts?"  I've heard the old saying "in a kingdom of divinity, simplicity speaks" and it was in this moment in which I felt God's presence.  We were in a deal room together, each rocking Canali suits and Armani ties, flashing Pateks (mine was slightly nicer), and talking about the true meaning of it all.  Only in banking can you go this deep.