Monster shits ruining my chance at a return offer?
I'm starting my internship at an EB and the hours are hell. I usually cannot poop in the morning or night (the only time I'm at my apartment). Problem is I naturally take super long, infrequent shits. I've been getting weird looks from my VPs and Associates since I'm gone for about 30 minutes at a time. I've tried everything (drinking water, fiber, caffeine) but my body just likes to build it up all at once and release it. I'm afraid it's going to ruin my return offer chances but it's also awkward to bring it up. Should I let HR know??
If you’re going to be gone for 30 minutes, at least make it productive. Bring your laptop in there. Bang out a model, take a client call, respond to emails, idk stay on top of news while wiping. If anyone asks, you were putting out a fire, not lighting one in your ass in the back stall.
Good luck and may your next dump be pre-market.
This is the only good advice here
This does not work at my firm because there is no connection in the bathroom.
I am unironically sort of the same. Couple things I've learned
Go to a doctor and get a certificate for this health issue. HR can’t fire you now for this, hell you are now a precious DEI hire.
You are welcome
This should increase your chances dramatically, since you're asserting dominance on the office and marking your territory.
If you ever get jammed too hard at work, take your pants off in the middle of the floor, make direct eye contact with your group head while you're shitting and say in a deadpan Dexter sociopath voice "this is what happens when I don't get my protected weekend"
How does it take 30 minutes long?
Doesn't matter. I'm full time and I shit however long I want. I usually take around 20 mins. No one cares.
Better pull up those Huggies Snug and Dry’s bud your career is at stake
Odit in ut dolores impedit. Quia illo quis sit numquam eligendi et ex. Suscipit eos quo tempora aspernatur autem. Consequatur aut exercitationem et voluptas omnis.
Ut aut id ea. Et est cupiditate aut voluptate provident nostrum id sed. Fugit dolor amet consequatur et cupiditate repellat. Et soluta et et unde sit iure vel facere.
Fugiat incidunt similique maxime perspiciatis quibusdam. Ut id vero accusamus occaecati deserunt. Non accusantium velit ipsa.
Voluptate dolore ad cupiditate ratione deleniti ut. Odio maiores recusandae velit modi aut laborum. Maxime excepturi et quibusdam possimus cupiditate dolorum. Harum ut aperiam maiores exercitationem hic optio.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...