Resume Mentor-- Needed
Editedx2
Hi everyone, I have a favor to ask for my internship hunt this summer. Could I have a couple members rate my resume pass/fail and offer their guidance/critique. Thank you!
Thank you everyone for the resume help and for taking the time to respond to me! boulders729 great formatting help!
xxx-ThrowAway-xxx you took a lot of time to write a response and had multiple impacts on my resume,
ARX713 thank you I should probably have a works cited for your contributions to my cooking experience, might have to dm you to see if I can send in an application
Deal Team Six thank you, also I shortened my cc section, I kept it just so there is less of a time gap.
I welcome more critiques, I will be sending my resume out again tonight or starting tomorrow. Thanks!
I'm just looking at it briefly, but have found some things:
You should make the decimals on your GPA consistent so either 3.7/4.0 of 3.66/4.00
Spacing between each section should be consistent, so space above work experience should be the same as the space above leadership and additional info
Same goes for spacing between sub sections like each job and club
Bullets under community college are unnecessary; you already show that you earned an associates degree no need to spell it out again
Delete extra space in front of help on last bullet under SUNY student government
I didn't read most of the bullets, so maybe go through those and make sure that they somehow show skills that can help in whatever kind of job you are targeting
My comments should help the formatting a little bit
Easier than rating would be giving feedback - hard to rate because in general the formatting is either right or wrong, the omission/inclusion of information could be tweaked, but the content (what "makes" the resume = makes someone want to bring you in for an interview) isn't really changeable if that makes sense.
Anyway, onto some quick things that stood out to me:
"bachelor of science finance major" sounds awkward to me, maybe try "bachelor of science in Finance"
Too much space/information on community college - keep it closer to your current university entry. Stick to Major, GPA, and any organizations/honors
the dash next to your date with your university entry doesn't match formatting of the rest
you need spaces between your entries & sections - such as the 16 handles entry to Leadership
Chris's Cafe - I would say only include entries that have at least 3 lines/bullets of information, however your entry there sounds relevant/interesting for IB/finance and a potential "spark" in your story - I would recommend elaborating on that with another 2 lines or omitting it from your resume entirely.
Under Skills - I don't really understand the entry. Are you talking about another customer service position not mentioned on resume? Doesn't really make sense to include it there.
Personally I would put "computer" under skills, "Computer" sounds awkward to me
Might get flak for saying something about this, but personally I would remove "dairy farming" from your interests section. While I find that interesting and if I were interviewing you I would want to hear about it, my general rule of thumb for interests is to try to (obviously not lying but) "tailor" them to interest Bankers might share with you. While this could differentiate you from other candidates (interesting back story/ diverse from other candidates) I would maybe bring it up in your interviews (well i was raised on a dairy farm and went to Community College ...) rather than on the resume. Maybe someone else could chime in and give another opinion on that.
Definitely didn't catch everything and theres for sure more to be improved on, but hopefully what I said will give you a good place to start editing!
Here's what I always tell people about resumes. You will receive comments from all different perspectives. You are your own sales guy, up to you how you want to present and pitch yourself.
Every bullet on your resume should add value to your conversation with your interviewer or at least the first main bullet of each experience should do so. Use your resume as a marketing document that gives your interviewer fodder to ask questions from.
I used to cook for a restaurant too, and that was one of my anchor stories in my interview. You could totally expand more on it because cooking in a kitchen was a much more high-pressure environment than banking. Not only are you trying to keep up with orders, no matter how jammed you are, the dish has to come out perfect and on time. No spills, no sloppy presentation, the temperature has to be just right, and the various dishes have to come out in sync (meats, fish, pasta all have different cook times but all have to arrive at the same time) as entrees. You're working in a tight group that demands extremely good team dynamic; you cover for each other when one's jammed on a order while also manning your station. I could go on and on etc. This is way more interesting to talk about in an interview how it's so related to banking than your bank teller experience.
PM me with any questions.
Take CC off your resume. Nothing wrong with it, but you no longer attend, and it doesn't add value
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