Okay, I lied. This is only a don'ts list.
Keep in mind, these are just some items I picked up from my experiences throughout the years. I'm not sharing this as a person who treats interns like dicks. I'm sharing this because I love y'all, and we all are here to help you succeed. Real talk.
1. Salary
Don't talk about your damn salary or how much money you're about to drop on a watch.
2. Don't come in thinking you know everything.
I'm positive most of you know this, but can't tell you how many interns that are not invited back because they try to justify their mistakes as opposed to admitting when they are wrong and learning from them.
3. Don't be late. Ever.
If you can't handle coming to work on time, how can someone have confidence in your ability to meet deadlines? Go out, and have fun. But set 48 alarm clocks to make sure you make it in on time.
4. Getting too comfortable
One of the most important - do NOT get too comfortable too quickly with the people you are working for. Please read this 5 times over. I've seen an intern joke with a Director about throwing dollar bills at the club. The Director didn't laugh, not because he didn't get the joke, but because he couldn't believe the idiot asked him that after only working there a month.
5. Proofreading
Don't ever send an email without proofreading. I have sent some emails out to deal teams that were so bad I had to recall them.
6. Questions
Don't ask a question to your associate or fellow senior analyst unless you thoroughly researched it. However, NEVER be afraid to ask questions.
7. Respect
Don't EVER email a coworker talking badly about someone in particular. The spotlight is on you everywhere, not just internally. If an email gets out about you talking shit about a peer, this can be detrimental news for your career.
8. Check your work
MOST IMPORTANT - Double-check your fucking numbers, and have confidence in them. Please, and seriously, check every single fucking number you put down. You hear me yet? Check every little fucking number. Your numbers must foot. When numbers are questioned, you create a slippery slope for yourself, and the entire deal team. Before you know it, mistakes will pile up and no one at your firm will have confidence in the financials you put together. Please read this again so you understand how critical this is. As someone who has severely fucked up with a wrong number in a power-point deck, please trust me when I tell you it can completely fuck up your career. Long story short, I had to switch banks. But guess what? I now have confidence in every number I present.
If anybody else has things to add, please post. Good luck to all of you! Y'all got this.
Mod Note (Andy): top 50 posts of 2017, this one ranks #38 (based on # of silver bananas)
Here are some Do's I would have found useful during my summer gig:
Agree on the "show initiative even if you're a kiss-ass"
Everyone knows you're a kiss ass and want the job. Just help out and kiss my ass already.
Spell check every single file, e-mail, or whatever you send out. Especially anything in Excel. You might not get caught, but 'EBTIDA' or 'managment' and the likes will make you look bad.
Ctrl + F for double spaces. You can't find them very easily on your screen, but they will stand out on prints.
And for Pete's sake, annotate your hard plugs in Excel with page number, which annual report and the company name (last one only if not obvious).
There are a lot of these threads out there -- and recommend interns read them all -- but piling on:
Always check your work. And when checking your work, always print out your pages, model, whatever. It is amazing how errors appear on printed paper when you couldn't see them on the screen. GET IN THIS HABIT.
Related to point 1 above, since you should have printed your pages out to double-check, once you're satisfied with them, bring a clean printed copy to your analyst / associate unless they ask you to stop doing so. It's a sign of respect, and people appreciate it.
Always be overly respectful internally -- to secretaries, to printing staff, etc. Those people have WAY more power than you think and can save your ass if they choose.
Per above, double-, triple- check your work.
Keep a notebook of your to-dos and mistakes. If you write down your mistakes over the course of the summer, e.g., "typo in email", it will keep them top-of-mind, and you'll be amazed how quickly you improve. (There have been a couple threads that mentioned this idea, and I wish I'd done it more consistently earlier in my career).
Although you're a summer (bottom of the totem pole), be efficient with your time. If there's an internal resource group, you can ask them to pull research for you, etc. Double check with an analyst first obviously, but no need to do everything manually if there are resources to help. Same with the graphics team, etc. For logo outputs, use www.logointern.com (buddy sent this to me recently, and it's already saved me hours).
Be curious. Poke around on the drive and look at old models. Study Macabacus, etc. A lot of this stuff won't be directly applicable to your day-to-day, but you'll be pleasantly surprised how it can come around to help you days or weeks later.
Oh, this is key. I'm past the SA role, and I still do that. I set up an Outlook appointment once a week where I go through my notebook to review my mistakes of that week. Once a month, I review all the mistakes I made since I started at my current firm. I make mistakes like every human being, but this notebook has helped me never making the same mistake twice.
Another good one:
If you're a summer analyst DON'T ask about PE recruiting 2 weeks into your internship. You're not being coy.
Good advice in this thread.
One thing to always keep in mind is to take pride in whatever you do. You are a CEO of one, and your name is a brand. What do you want people to think of when they think of you? This means ensuring that your work is always the best that it can be. This means taking the extra time to proofread and double check everything. When you hand in anything to another banker, you should feel comfortable that your work could be blindly passed to a client. Your performance one day one matters, and playing catch-up in IB is a game with no winners.
Sounds simple, but think about this the next time you work on something.
GreenAttack, your offer is a vote of confidence from the BB. They would not have extended an offer to a sophomore if they did not believe in your ability to do the job.
My biggest piece of advice is to make sure to participate in all SA social events when you're in NY. If your training group is hitting up a bar after training, join them. If your analyst offers to buy you lunch, join him/her. If your MD wants to grab coffee, accept. You get the idea. The kids in my analyst class who never participated had a miserable time and never really fit in or made friends.
I am personally against taking time before an internship to do any type of training simply because the bank will give you the training making preparing beforehand a zero-sum game. That being said, if it will calm your nerves, Account Coach is a free and great resource to brush up on accounting.
Yeah, it's looking good so far chief, but I got a couple to add to the list.
9) No fucking socks with Sperrys, it's gay
10) Pics or it didn't happen. No one believes that you bagged HR lady unless you snap a quick one while her heads in the pillow.
11) Wait until lunch to jerk off. It's always awkward when someone is looking for you and they finally find you walking back to your desk red faced and sweating a little.
12) For when you break Rule 11: Don't be a fucking animal, jizz in the toilet. Other people are trying to jerk off in this handicapped stall and no one wants to see your remnants. It's a respect thing. You're not Gordon fucking Gekko. Shoot your load where it belongs. Make VP and then we can talk about wall shots.
13) ALWAYS, start the conversation by name-dropping your frat. Sure the MD with the Ferrari taking up two parking spots out back is technically higher in status than you, but he still remembers back when he was a NF GDI and you crushed his girl's box. Automatically makes you the alpha male.
14) No one gives a shit about your salary, don't even negotiate it. If you're truly from a top tier frat and belong there than your dad's inheritance should cover the difference.
15) Fuck that euro shit. Polo Tees and New Balances to the clubs, anything else is gay.
16) Fuck that suit shit. Polo Tees and New Balances to work.
17) Cigs inside- but only on Friday's. I understand that cigs in the house is not an every day thing, but you need to respect yourself enough as an intern to understand that you're obligated to certain rights as a human being.
18) If times are desperate and you have to dig through the trash for an empty water bottle to use as a dip spitter - take an elevator to the Back Office floor first so nobody cool sees you do it. Those guys are fags anyway.
I just thought of one tip that I frequently use, but never hear others share. If your bank uses a share drive, create shortcuts on your desktop for frequently used folders. Then, right-click on the shortcut that is on your desktop, click on Properties, and then enter in a key (e.g. A or W) into the Shortcut key field. Now, whenever you want to access this shortcut, simply press ALT+CTRL+the shortcut key. If there is a project whose sharedrive folder you frequently access, this should save you a lot of time.
I've never heard any banker call a female coworker (secretary, junior or same rank) "honey" and anyone who did say this or similar would be spoken to by HR pretty quickly. This is stupid liability behaviour which would be shut down very quickly, even by other guys who spend their time a strip clubs.
That said, that just means that gender discrimination in the workplace is more demonstrated in actions and closed door conversations than in public utterances. The same guys who would shut down a fellow banker calling a woman "honey" will also sit in a breakout room and rate the looks of the women on their floor.
What I think is a useful thing for female candidates to bear in mind is that you will be judged by some on your looks (to varying extents) and, in some situations, you may feel like you can use this to your advantage. BE VERY CAREFUL in doing this and, if possible, avoid doing it at all.
A case study - a few years ago there was a very bright summer intern who was very good at the work she did. However, she was also quite good looking and shapely. Sometimes she would would wear too-short skirts and sit on co-workers desks when speaking with them, which would show off her legs.
The downside of this approach was that it quickly pigeon-holed her into the "hot young thing" category, which means that this became the primary tag associated with her. She did good work, but that became a secondary trait. This is not a good approach to getting hired or moving upward at work, as you risk being seen primarily through the "hot young thing" lens and the value of your other traits will be overlooked.
I've also seen HR needing to speak to female interns about appropriate workplace clothing.
From a sociological view, you can say that men are a large part of the problem in these sort of perception issues. However, that is the nature of the workplace, even as it changes as a pretty slow pace. If you want to play in this world (and perhaps eventually change the rules), you must recognise the rules - however unfair they may be - and work out how to navigate through and around them.
ONE THING YOU MUST KNOW: If you get placed in industry covfefe
Good list. Have a some additions;
No one cares who your dad is, who you think you are, etc.
Learn to take a joke. Taking yourself seriously is good practice. Too seriously can be a problem
As an employee you need to learn to say 'no' sometimes, but as an Intern? Don't ever say no unless someone asks if you're sick of the work
So far you haven't learned anything in life/college that can add value to the banking process. You're there because of potential to someday add value
Keep your mouth shut. Talking about deals--even outside your deal team--is generally frowned upon. Some companies are giving you material nonpublic information. Hell, the fact you may be working on a potential carveout of a core revenue line for a public major is probably material nonpublic. This includes talking to girls at bars. I know cases in NYC where people had loose lips and it resulted in far worse than being fired/laid off. Fair warning
Talking down to admins/HR/support (read back office) is a very quick way to ensure you won't be invited back
Navy or charcoal suits. White or light blue button downs. Non-luxury ties (Hermes, Ferragamo, Charvet, etc.). Black belt/shoes (penny or cap toes. No borges). No brown anything other than maybe a wallet. No flashy/graduation gift watches (Rolex, Audemars Piguet, A Lange Sohne, etc.). No ironic socks. Just buy a ton of navy and black gold toes and be done with it
Being relatable and knowing how to tell a story can make up for technical shortfalls (even at the intern level)
Generally good points, although I really don't get the fashion advice in #7. I summered at a large middle-market bank as a junior intern and I'm currently working as an equity research associate at a bulge bracket right now, and nobody cares about brown shoes/belts/whatever. In fact, probably a third of my office wears brown shoes on a daily basis, and nobody ever wears a tie. Why do people on WSO always make such a big deal out of this?
These are just a few suggestions:
In the bullpen with analysts and associates, DONT be the loud summer. Get to know the lay of the land before taking shots on goal.