Cold email template advice — abysmal response rate

Can I get some advice on my cold email template? My response rate is terrible <10% among alumni and I don't think that's normal after reading some other posts. If I find something beyond Alumni connection when looking at their LinkedIn, I throw in a sentence about that as well. I also attach my resume which I think is probably average. 

Subject: (Name of University) Student Interested in (specific group) Investment Banking 
Hi NAME,

I hope you are doing well. My name is ___ and I am a sophomore studying Business Administration at (University Name). I'm really interested in a career in investment banking and was wondering if you might have 15 minutes for a quick phone call. I'd greatly appreciate your time and advice. 

Thank you!

Best,
xxx

6 Comments
 

If you are at a public school that is about right. This time of year is tough with everyone scrambling to finish work before the holidays.

 

I’ve sent ~60 emails so not a ton. I’ll keep going until I get the necessary results, but I wanted to make sure I’m not doing anything that’s an instant ding so I’m not wasting contacts and time.

I’m also just concerned because I’ve been almost exclusively reaching out to alumni, and so once that list is depleted it could get even worse.

 

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