Interview Avoidance
I have been getting quite a lot of callbacks for interviews over the past 6 months, which I am very confident of getting. However, I find myself avoiding the interviews. As stupid as this sounds, its almost like I'm afraid to interview and I always cancel a day or two prior to the interview. I reschedule and the same thing happens again.
I have no idea what the problem is. I psych myself up and this thought pops up in my head, and I just go with that. The worse thing is I have killed several telephone interviews, and my current position was on the basis of one of those. I dont know if its self consciousness but its definitely something. I can do these jobs but the interview seems so daunting.
I realize how this sounds and I understand I will get no job without getting over this but does anyone understand what I'm going through? Is it simply nerves and if so what can I do?
I have a big interview coming up Friday and I have 3 people interviewing me. What can I do?
Any help will be greatly appreciated.
So you are getting interviews and just not showing up for them? Are you serious?
No, I never said that. I'm saying I am having a little trouble getting over this anxiety.
You've become too comfortable in your position. This is basically our biggest enemy, because when you're comfortable everything else seems huge and scary. Have someone you trust go with you to the interview (wait downstairs or at a coffee shop or whatever), it will go away the minute they shake hands with you.
If you know you can kill it, it's going to be such a rewarding feeling when you re-gain your confidence.
If you're still in doubt, call me and I will woop your virtual ass and make you go to the interview.
I dont think its that. I hate my job, thats the reason I am looking for a position. I was going to grad school but I decided to get some more work experience and get an MBA.
Its more like I'm afraid and I know I will end up stuttering, being nervous or wont be able to explain something. So my answer to that is to delay. Any tips on what to do?
This sounds like analysis paralysis. Don't overthink - JUST DO. Walk into the interview, smile, be confident.
That happened to me when I was finishing undergrad...once you are over the hump of the first interview it is fine.
complacency kills. u need to take a long hard look in the mirror and wake the fuck up.. with this job market you must be doing something right to get called into interview consistently....now play the cards that you've been dealt and rock that fricking interview
Again, I dont think its complacency. I am actually worried this is a serious problem. Confidence issue maybe. I dont know where I went wrong.
Taking a few deep breaths. Remember that screwing up happens. Don't let it define the way you want to live your life. If you walk into an interview and fuck up, it's just another interview. Failing during interviews/jobs happens, so there's no use worrying about it.
Talk to friends and family about your problems. Sometimes talking things out can really help, and at the very least they can be a support system that pushes you to go through with interviews.
Lastly, maybe seek professional counsel. I have OCD, so I definitely know how anxiety disorders can knock you on your ass. The sooner to treat it, the better it's going to be. No shame in wanting to resolve these issues and get better.
complacency kills. u need to take a long hard look in the mirror and wake the fuck up.. with this job market you must be doing something right to get called into interview consistently....now play the cards that you've been dealt and rock that fricking interview
Interview performance anxiety... just go in there and lose your interview v card.
Have had interviews before, and killed them. This suddenly has become an issue. I was hoping it hadnt but I cant deny it for much longer. I need out of my job.
Does anyone have any tips or links to help me overcome this? Its really pissing me off. I know I can do the job but its convincing them that is the trouble.
I have an interview on Friday with 3 people, and I'm dreading it.
I had a similar issue when recruiting season began. Before I had crushed interviews without a problem, but my first two interviews left me shaking and speechless. To combat this and just gain my confidence back I did a mock interview with a close friend who has had more interviews than anyone I know. One of the best tips he gave me that has been extremely helpful in the interview process is to bring a bottle of water. Take a sip whenever you need to stall for time or want to collect your thoughts. It looks completely natural and also leaves you refreshed.
You asked for my feedback, so here it is:
You already have a job (albeit one you hate, which is why you're looking). You have nothing going into these interviews. You are probably psyching yourself into thinking the job is yours to lose and that you're going to fuck the interview up, but you're wrong. You have nothing going into the interview, and therefore the interviewers have nothing they can take away from you. Who gives a shit if you blow the interview? You've already got a job, which is a lot more than many on this board can say.
Here's a suggestion: pick an interview for a firm you're not crazy about and do your best to blow it. I'm not kidding. Get in there and stutter, fuck up your answers, do whatever you can think of to blow the interview. When you leave you'll know what it feels like and you'll realize it's not that bad.
It really comes down to confidence, so take this next bit of advice to heart: go get laid before your next interview. It'll do wonders for your confidence. Go into the interview knowing that you're probably the only person in the room who saw a woman naked in the past 24 hours. You might think I'm joking but I'm not. Never underestimate the power of the P.
This is the most SB worthy advice I've ever seen!
Thanks a lot for the advice. I definitely understand what you're saying. Its just when you feel the position is a good one and all thats standing between you and it is a shitty interview, it's a lot to carry into the next day. When I'm back at work doing something I hate, or worse back home unemployed (because I'm seriously considering just resigning), the interview plays on your mind.
You should figure out what questions are going to be asked, figure out how you want to answer the questions and what you want to comunicate to your potential employers (tailored to the job description and industry). Once you figure this out, ask a friend to help you practice. You can really calm your nerves by rehearsing this in a real life scenario. Even over beers to calm your nerves. Once you have hem memorized, work on your presentation, body language, tonality and friendliness. Make sure that you answer concisely and most importantly, suck it up! Good luck.
I agree with the bottle water trick and with everything that Eddie said.
What type of position are you in now, what type of positions are you typically interviewing for?
Regards
At a consulting firm. Heading to a equity research role. Hopefully.
Maybe some of the anxiety stems from lack of preparedness or perceived lack of preparedness? Do you feel you understand the materials and interview topics well enough to discuss intelligently? Do you feel you are well prepared for the interviews as a whole?
Some people just have anxiety that is there for no real reason, but you have to remember that it's almost always psychological. Ultimately you control whether or not you freak out about this stuff and how it impacts you physically. Just think about all of the people that you know that work in banking or consulting or ER or whatever. Are they all smarter and more capable than you? Probably not. I know lots of people that are not as smart or driven as I am but have positions that are equal or better...so I know I'm capable of doing more. I also know people that are measurably smarter than I am that never finished HS and one in particular that works as a manager at a used sporting good store. He has much more intellectual capacity than I do, but he didn't have the drive to be successful and made bad decisions. Anyways, the point is, you choose your path at the end of the day.
Maybe I'm oversimplifying the situation because I have no real experience with anxiety like yours, but watch this video and just think about what the guy says in it...
Regards
Thank you for all the advice. I am very grateful. My interview was due to be on Friday but luckily, the interviewer canceled so now it is due for this Wednesday. Its an equity research role.
Right now I'm in this boutique consulting firm. Sounds fine but the problem is that the job when advertised said something else, and all I have been doing for the past 8 months is telephone research. Its a piece of shit job and I cant wait to leave.
Anyone who provided feedback via PM, I am very grateful. I will get back to all you of you but I'm on my iPhone right now and its kinda sucky. Thanks again!
I will post after the interview. With the bottle of water thing, would that be OK to do? It doesnt look unprofessional or anything? Esp considering they may offer water..?
Your problem, it sounds, is that you are interviewing with no rhyme or reason. you know you want to be out of your current sitch, but you haven't put thought into where you see yourself. Don't interview with everyone who asks, it's a waste of your time, energy, and confidence. Identify the type of company you want to be at, as in WHY you want to go there and what would you find there that you don't have now. Then target those companies. Network, research, etc etc. Why fake excitement when you can find somewhere you are truly excited to be at? You have a job and no immediate need to settle, so don't. If you have concerns after a phone interview, don't go into personal interview unless they are resolved. They are interviewing you, but you are also interviewing them. It's that simple.
Or just blaze the ganja before hand like Argonaut avatar.
Also, word of advice - keep your search on the down low. If they lied to you to trick you into that position, they will most likely try to f you over on the way out. Cover your ass :)
I quit my job last night. I was having a bad day (got into a huge fight with my girl) and subsequently I let it affect me at work. I was given this mundane bullshit task to complete by lunch, and I couldnt even bring up enough energy to do it. Long story short, my boss came in, went apeshit and I just walked out. Wanted to let him have it but thought better of it. I emailed my resignation today, as if they didnt know already.
Now fuck, I'm very nervous for this interview. I think you're right Argonaut. I did accept interviews on the basis that they offered them. I mean I applied because I needed to get out of my job but not because I desperately wanted this job.
Now that I'm out, not sure I want to jump into interview with this drama weighing on my mind. I dont want to cancel either. Fucked right now. Headed to a bar.
Hopefully you have enough savings to be able to take your time and find a job you want. I wouldn't drink too heavily if I were you, alcohol is a depressant and it sounds like you are already pretty stressed. Catch up on sleep, go out into nature, like a park or something, and run/walk for a couple of hours. You need to regain your peace of mind for the interview and also you should feel relieved you no longer have to go into a situation that was stressing you out.
Support structure around me fucking sucks.
Nut up or shut up, brother. It's go time.
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