Ex girlfriend unblocked me on Instagram after 3 years. Thoughts on what this could mean?

I was searching for a celebrity on Instagram and as I typed the first 4 letters, I noticed my ex gf who blocked me on IG 3 years ago appeared. Is she stalking me/what could this mean? Anyone else here experience the same?

Edit: she broke up with me 5 years ago and she came back into my life 1 year later after 2 failed relationships, only to be "friends" but she's been with 4 dudes after me in total now. I moved on and all but just fear she'll reach out and I don't know how I would react since she's my first love and shit

52 Comments
 
Funniest
windex31

Yes, have experienced this exact situation many times. Usually means she's in love with you again

Agreed, there's no other discernable explanation. However, the gentlemen-y thing to do now is to block her for the next three years.

Only to ensure both sexes remain equal. It's also a very 2023 thing to do!

 

I have. I just don’t want her reaching out and finding ways to manipulate me into seeing her like she did 3 years ago. We broke up 5 years ago and she’s been with 4 dudes after me, lol

SR
 

Been in the same boat and the honest answer is no one can tell you what it means. She could've unblocked you because she fully healed and wants to move on. She could've unblocked you because she wants you back. But none of that is under your control. What you do have control over is choosing whether to reach out because you still have feelings (and have changed), or to stop overthinking because it doesn't matter anymore. 

imo if she wants to reach out, she would. Theres no point of overthinking so just live in the present

 

Yeah that makes perfect sense. I blocked her 3 years ago as well and don’t intend to unblock her since I don’t want her back in my life. She came back to me once and that didn’t go well. I just don’t want her reaching out again

SR
 

IT'S NOT WORTH IT KING DON'T DO IT

"If you don't have any enemies in life you have never stood up for anything" - Winston Churchill | "It's a testament to the sheer belligerence of the profession that people would rather argue about the 'risk-adjusted returns' of using inferior tooth cleaning methods." - kellycriterion
 

You don't mention who initiated the breakup, but I am going to hazard a guess that she did? She left you, dated 4 other guys (basically 1 per year), and now realizes that the grass isn't greener and she shouldn't have left you. Her clock is ticking and, in the last 5 years, you have been progressing with your career and life. It's likely she wants the whole 2.1 kids and 30-year fixe-rate mortgage and you're the guy who can deliver that (unlike the other 4 guys who may have been "fun"). She may be keeping you on the backburner just incase other "better/more alluring" options don't work out for her. My advice, look forward and don't chase the past. Plenty of other girls out there.   

 

As much as you want to believe it means she came to her senses and wants you back, the reality is she thinks she can walk in and out of your life at any moment's notice and believes you will be there. If she had any respect for you she would know that once you repeatedly leave, that door closes forever.

If blocking her will make you feel like you won't relapse and fall into the idealistic trap and being together happily ever after, then do it. Personally, I'd leave her unblocked, let her stalk and if she decides to reach out: you respectfully decline and wish her well, without a "friendship", just a clean no contact. You gotta be the one that got away man.

 

Like Liquidiot said, leave her unblocked, let her stalk you, and watch you enjoy your life unless you need to block her because you can't resist her. Women typically initiate most breakups and divorces, but they usually look back and try to sneak back into your life when they're down and see you doing good too.

As you said, it could have been the holidays. A lot of women get in their feelings during the holidays when they don't have a man to show off to their family or don't have the security they want. Hot girl summer turns into a cold lonely winter for many women. Continue doing good, and don't look back; that's a feminine trait. You're already giving her too much thought.

 

All - thank you so much for each and every one of your insights. I came to the conclusion that I should be the one that got away, as a few of you said. When we dated, I was a chubby 2.3 GPA high-school graduate who went to community college. After she dumped me, I got in shape, fell in love with reading, transferred to a good college, and broke into IB. My standards aren’t the same as when I fell for her, and I should not look back and never settle, especially for someone in my shitty past. I am beyond grateful for every one of you, even the jokesters, haha.

Cheers, fellas and God bless!

SR
 

Mate, you might not have plentiful of chicks sloshing around but surely had dated a number of girls after her, time to ignore her. 

Meeting someone new is much more fun. 

Array
 

I just got dumped 3 weeks ago after Christmas. Hurt like a bish. Loved her, and even got her sized up for rings in October.

I dropped the ball in a few areas, and I am open to reconciling if she comes back before April 15 (1/3 of a year post breakup) and does not ride the carousel in the process. I already took one trip and she started watching my stories out of the blue...I do not watch hers. It was a trip we were supposed to take together.

However, if she reached out 3 years later, there is no way I would take her back unless God Himself told me to do so. I mention my story to draw a parrallel to yours. I am where you were post breakup. She is coming back because she sees you thriving and her life is not (stagnant/declining due to weight, age, etc). She is depreciating in front of everyone's eyes. You do not purchase. You are the settle/safe guy. She probably put you in that box the day that she met you being a chubby community college student. The fact that you glowed up probably burns her up too.

You have two options:

1. Leave her unblocked, let her see you thrive and let her become your biggest fan

2. Block her and forget about her

If you are single, block her. Because even though she is older and fatter, you still see her like you did when you were younger. If you have a rotation/relationship, leave her unblocked.

 

I hate to break it to you but if she dumped you, she's likely had someone lined up already.

Chicks don't dump their bfs and stay single. They lateral. High probability she already rode someone cock before breaking up with you.

Array
 

Hey, man - sorry you went through that; I admire your strength and thinking. I was only 19 when this girl broke up with me and mannnn.. I was in a shit hole when it happened and allowed myself to go down a rabbit hole. I lost 50 pounds in 2.5 months, was on academic probation, and got fired from a warehouse job at the time. Therapy def helped me out a lot. The issue of why it took me so long to move on is because she came back to my life twice, and I was a fool to allow it, thinking she would see my worth. But as Bush once said, “fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.”

I hope you heal fast, and thank you for sharing your story to help me with my current situation. Thanks to you and the other fellas who commented, I won’t be overthinking this, won't ever give her an opportunity to come back, and will remain to have her blocked for her to never contact me again. Her best friend, who I unfollowed a long time ago on IG, still follows me and views my shit, so if she wants a show, she can have one, lol. Best of luck, my man.

SR
 

It could mean a bunch of things, bro. On one hand yeah maybe she’s stalking you and mustering up the courage to reach out. On the other hand, she could’ve been scrolling through accounts she’s blocked, realized its been five years, and unblocked you for the sake of maturity or simply being over it.

I think this could be a good time to reflect and understand why you’re scared of her reaching out?

Regardless of your answer, be confident that you’re a bad mf, who doesn’t need someone so toxic to have such a strong grip over your mental to the point of posting about it. Your person is out there. But i think you’ll only be able to recognize the right person if you’re in the right headspace - whether that’s confidence or happiness. Good luck

 

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Array
 

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