Have you ever lost interest in a girlfriend even though she didn't intentionally do anything wrong?
Not talking about things like cheating or putting on weight.
Have you ever lost interest just because she got "boring" and you got used to her? Maybe you felt she was too available? She stopped being a challenge?
I've been with my gf for just over a year now, but for the last 3 - 4 months I have lost interest.
I know, i know its not all about the looks. Don't get me wrong she is one of the smartest people I know and I respect her immensely. I'm just not attracted to her physically anymore.
Have you ever gone through this??
Yea and what you're going through is totally okay. It's okay to break up with people over lack of attraction or really anything at all. It's not fun for both sides to be in a "meh" situation and those are the worst because it's purgatory: comfortable enough not to have explicit breakup reasons but dissatisfied enough to have it bother you. Just make sure you have a game plan to work on yourself or something after so you don't develop regret
+1 purgatory statement is absolutely true. It’s fucking frustrating, have glimpses of the past and wanting to stay because we have such a long history, but things just aren’t the same.
Are you afraid to tell her ?
Hasn't happened to me, but I imagine it's normal. It's been a year and you got to know her and she isn't the one for you. It's no one's fault.
This has happened to me for every single girl I have dated before. Seems to be pretty common.
Damn. How you cope with that
R u seeing anyone rn ? And if so, do you see yourself getting tired of her
I am seeing someone right now and what I changed about my mindset going into a relationship is being with a girl that is legit a friend. Not the hottest girl out there or the one that will seem the best to your buddies. But, instead, going after the girl that is legit your very, very good friend. Similar hobbies. Similar approaches to life and mindset. Similar senses of humor. Someone you can be unapologetically yourself around and not ever even have an inkling of a thought that they may not like what you say. Things like that. Just like you don't get tired of a good buddy I believe that if you pick your girlfriend the same way then things are much different. Been with this one for awhile now and live in a van together (65 sq. ft. total) and things are going well. Having said that, ya never know.
Never thought I’d relate to a WSO post as much as I relate to this. But to answer you question, this is how my last three relationships ended
Wow. So how's your dating life now.
Do you think you can find someone that'll change everything or you just wanna fuck around for now ?
Im gonna post a longer thread on this in the coming weeks bc I’ve written a lot on this topic but here is a concise summary/ answers to your question:
it’s on the back burner rn bc after a lot of reflecting I came to this conclusion.
1)if I want to find a girl who I am gonna be crazy about for the rest of my life I need to work on myself so that I can be a capable boyfriend/husband. I’m a firm believer that I want to end up with someone out of my league so to do that I need to better myself as much as possible.
2) no I’m not fucking around. I did enough of that in college and if I’m trying to accomplish my goals from the point above, I need to give up the one night stands (and before the question comes in… yes the dry spell is killing me but it’s worth it in the long run)
I’ll be sure to PM you the link to the thread on this topic when I post it.
Can relate. The same happened to me
Happened to me but the problem comes when you also feel she's done so much for you already that no one else did and you just don't want to hurt her by breaking up with her and letting her be alone.
Are you still with her ?
I am
Hormones and novelty can fuel the first year together even if two people have nothing in common. You’ll convince yourself of a lot of things that aren’t true when you’re drunk on brain chemicals, so try to be more self aware and cognizant next time
It has never happened to me personally, I am normally very enthusiastic about the girl I am seeing. However, and this is a big one, many if not most of the couples I know mentioned that intimacy might become infrequent, and then might stop at some point. I know a few couples that have no intimacy at all. And all of these couples have been together for a while, 18 months or longer. I am assuming that they no longer find each other attractive.
After 18 months? When people first get together, they have sex like rabbits but it shouldn't stop after only 18 months. minimum twice a week, preferably around 3-4 times a week. If you don't have sex regularly, you're not a healthy person.
Yeah. The thing is we have a high libido. But I just don’t get turned on by her anymore. And we used to fuck 4 times a week
Libido is completely different in every single person. None of my gfs had the same sex drive. A guy obviously wants to have sex, but that doesn't mean it will happen with your gf or wife.
Like I said, I am very enthusiastic about my gfs, have always been.
but other couples I have seen had severe problems that ended up in them having no sex at all. And I am sure there are other reasons for it, not that they don't want to have sex. maybe they simply don't get along.
Guess the saying "the grass is always greener on the other side" is pretty consistent
This sounds like a situation where you fell into a relationship with a great friend. You love her, but you aren't in love with her. I think this has less to do with physical attraction than you might think.
When you are truly in love, the physical becomes a totally secondary thing. You'll want to have sex with the person because you love them. Looks are a bonus of course, but they don't last forever.
the longer you stay, the longer it’s gonna hurt her when the truth comes out.
if the roles were reversed, the comments section would be like: YASSSSS QUEEEN YOU GO KWEEEN
This happened to me with my last relationship. You’re always interested in someone else for some reason. There’s just so many girls out there so you feel maybe you can do better. At least that’s how I felt
I think this just kinda happens sometimes. Don't beat yourself up over it, but if it doesn't get fixed, don't waste her time either. I've been there before. Just means they aint "the one" for you.
R u still single ?
This happened with different people a while ago, but technically yes but moving in the direction of no, it's hard to describe. It also could come to a quick end for things not really in our control fml
Pretty normal for the smoke to clear after 6 months to a year and to then be faced with how you really feel about the person now the initial excitement is gone.
Had a similarish situation where I spent 6 months in that limbo/purgatory phase and finally put the kibosh on it. In my case I realized there were some things that were deal breakers and that were never going to change.
You're not a bad person for realizing it's just not doing it for you, better realize that now than x many years/levels of commitment later.
You could remain friends and when you are older you could reconnect if you are both single. Basically what you are saying is you want to be single and have exit options
Quod tempora consequatur excepturi libero voluptas. Dolorum praesentium eos accusamus. Vitae consequatur aliquam porro fuga similique enim qui. Est consequuntur cum et dolor laudantium. Qui et assumenda dignissimos sed aliquid. Consequuntur animi placeat voluptates.
Quod et qui placeat debitis pariatur. Qui qui unde dignissimos qui quis. Non quisquam sequi accusamus saepe.
Perferendis qui ut assumenda consequatur. Nam accusamus nobis laborum sed adipisci. Placeat fuga porro voluptatem necessitatibus sequi totam. Sit qui unde est commodi amet sunt consequatur. Numquam sed ad debitis reprehenderit vel.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...
Eos nesciunt illum recusandae ut sed. Illo doloribus eveniet unde ut iste in animi. Sint nihil reiciendis molestiae fugiat officiis numquam. Eius iure labore aut eaque soluta temporibus et voluptas. Magnam officia velit perspiciatis aut quidem.
Recusandae mollitia officia debitis. Rerum et illo neque et. Saepe illo distinctio est eum facere.