People who despise the industry you work for - uncomfortable date story

My first post here but basically for more context, I'm an analyst in PE, and have met a few people who are nice initially, but then squirm when they ask me what I work in and I say PE. Which, obviously, I totally understand (Frankly I'm doing it bc I'm aiming for earlier financial freedom, and potentially good exits when I leave). 

One recent experience, in particular, stuck with me. It goes like this - I had begun a casual relationship with a guy in academia (we both established it clearly before going in). It started off as lighthearted fun, but the most recent instance I met up with him, he started asking me what exactly I do in PE. Then he went on and on about all the controversial practices people in PE do, how companies have cratered under PE, and how immoral it is. I conceded and said he was right, and that I have an internal dilemma myself: wanting to be pragmatic and maximize my personal wealth, but also fully acknowledging that I'm working for a questionable industry to get there. 

I thought he was just making a passing comment - it actually turned into a full blown monologue about he despises people who are money driven, and that's why he's staying closer to science, how he doesn't feel good associating himself with friends who work for "evil" industries, etc. Then he kept saying how he only tries to surround himself with genuinely good people. Those are good values to have, but I wasn't even auditioning to be his girlfriend/LTR - so the conversation felt heavy. All the while, we were circling around my apartment for nearly 30 minutes trying to find street parking, because he didn't want to pay 10 bucks for a parking in a lot nearby. Oh and TMI cherry on top -- he talked about the biological mechanism behind a breakthrough pancreatic cancer treatment -- yet the first time he initiated hooking up, he didn't bring a condom. It struck me as odd given his extensive scientific knowledge, so I'm assuming it was laziness.

Anyways, more of a vent post actually. He's the most blatant example, but I've met a few others who will also make it known to me that I work for an evil industry. Again, totally valid reaction - but I should probably just avoid disclosing my job at all, even if people ask

6 Comments
 

Based on the most helpful WSO content, your experience highlights a common challenge faced by professionals in industries like private equity, where public perception can often be negative. Here are a few takeaways and strategies to navigate such situations:

  1. Acknowledging the Stigma: It's clear from your story that you're self-aware about the criticisms of the industry, which is a good starting point. Many professionals in PE grapple with similar internal dilemmas, as seen in WSO threads discussing burnout, career regrets, and the moral complexities of the field.

  2. Handling Conversations About Your Job:

    • If you sense judgment or discomfort, you might consider framing your role in a way that emphasizes the skills you're building or the broader impact of your work. For example, focus on the operational improvements or value creation aspects rather than the financial engineering side.
    • Alternatively, you could keep your job description vague in casual settings, especially if you anticipate a negative reaction. For instance, saying you work in "finance" or "investments" might avoid triggering a deeper critique.
  3. Dealing with Judgment:

    • It's important to remember that not everyone will understand or appreciate your career choices, and that's okay. As one WSO thread suggests, the finance industry often attracts criticism, but it's crucial to stay focused on your personal goals and values.
    • If someone becomes overly critical or condescending, like the individual in your story, it might be worth reconsidering how much energy you invest in that relationship. Surrounding yourself with people who respect your choices, even if they don't fully agree, can make a big difference.
  4. Balancing Personal and Professional Identity:

    • Many WSO users have shared that they initially pursued finance for financial freedom but later shifted their focus to roles or industries that align more closely with their values. If this resonates with you, it might be worth exploring long-term exit opportunities that provide a better balance between your financial goals and personal ethics.
  5. Perspective on the Encounter:

    • The irony of someone criticizing your industry while refusing to pay for parking or neglecting basic precautions like a condom isn't lost here. It underscores that everyone has their contradictions, and no one is perfect. Don't let such interactions weigh too heavily on you.

Ultimately, your career is your journey, and it's okay to prioritize your goals while being mindful of the broader implications of your work. If you're ever feeling overwhelmed or conflicted, the WSO community is a great resource for advice and shared experiences.

Sources: Response to 'PE Associate Jumps to Death' -> Resources and Tips for those who may be struggling, Dealing with PM (equities) who is trying to limit your progress, Handling Stress / Burnout in Private Equity, Just got laid off from my 3rd PE job in 4 years - help!, My Associates Hate Me

I'm an AI bot trained on the most helpful WSO content across 17+ years.
 

bro no one cares you work in a evil industry, especially when your a low level spreadsheet monkey, those same people watched the slave built world cup in 2022 and have stocks in companies running metal mines in the third world, they just don't like you can or will make more money than them and this is a semi acceptable way to cope, and if they are not and acc don't care about money they wouldn't say shit and just be like oh nice.

 

Are you still hooking up with that dumbass?

If you haven't left him yet then you should act as greedy and evil as possible just to fuck with him.  Tell him your boss's boss is on the board of his university or something and isn't happy with things.

 

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