I had to change my Poop room

I’m at a top middle market bank (think fidus/Key Banc) and I’ve had the same bathroom for a year now, a remote almost secretive sanctuary where I go cathartically shit out my day.

To my horror I found somebody in there when I was near busting at the seams: an entire turtle exhibit in my pants. Not only was somebody in there but they were playing what sounded like pornography out loud when I entered the secretive restroom. I checked his shoes and found out it was 100% one of my new virgin analysts.

Now I’m conflicted. I want to report him because he violated my bathroom with his virgin seed and it pisses me off we let some unprestigious virgin in our group, but I don’t want to be a Karen.

Lmk if anybody has experienced anything like this.