The David Rubenstein story

If you've ever watched more than one extended interview of Carlyle's David Rubenstein, you'll notice that he has a very formulaic/structured way of going through his life story, with a usual routine of jokes, anecdotes, and statistics. It comes out to about 30-45 mins, where he starts by talking about growing up in a working class Jewish family and finishing all the library books he borrows in a day, goes on to how he reads up about the age of 37 as an empirical cutoff point for entrepreneurship and starts Carlyle based on an LBO he read about, and finishes off with how he brings a copy of the magna carta through airport security and gets himself into his self-coined "patriotic philanthropy"...

for those with a little more life experience on the forums, what's your "long story"? Is it something you get to tell often, and how do you always tell it? How would you tell it if you were ever on the big stage?

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Some version of my life story which can or can’t be derived from all of my previous posts will come up when I do an AMA one day in the future.

As for telling my story in person, I do it all the time. I tailor the length and content to my audience. I don’t change the story, just what I highlight. My favorite is when I get 5 minutes to introduce myself (and I always ask others to take time to really intro themselves like at least 5 minutes). Because if one actively listens, most questions that one would ask in a meeting or interview about the person are often answered in these “stories” and “introductions” and the rest of the conversation, I find, ends up being much more productive and to the point. It just takes a little time and effort, like with most good things in life.

Now not everyone agrees with me, and so I adjust to that.

What inspired this train of thought? It was years ago before I got into a hedge fund. I was knocking doors, getting nowhere and just tired one day and the head of the office of a major hedge fund asked me to “introduce myself”. I looked at him, rolled my eyes and clearly in an exasperated way told him “ yeah ok whatever. Which version do you want? The usual one minute investment banker deal or like the real story?” He sort of laughed and said “Let me start” and went on for 10-15 minutes.

That really gave me insight into who this guy is, where he started, what drives him, what challenges he faced, what he wanted etc. Then I did the same and the rest of the conversation was awesome. I never worked with him but we had a real mutual respect after that and are still in touch.

I used to do Asia-Pacific PE (kind of like FoF). Now I do something else but happy to try and answer questions on that stuff.
 
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"earthwalker7" He isn't really an investor tho, right? He's a BD/fundraising guy, and the firm has built investment teams under him.

Yes I cannot overstate this any more than you can @earthwalker7" - the investment guy is (or was) Bill Conway and then D'Aniello after that. Rubenstein is the well connected, smooth talking, extremely well read and intelligent capital raiser.

I actually met him years ago and he was telling me that he still spends (or spent) over 200 days away/on the Carlyle Private Jet per year. Other secrets? "I don't drink. That takes a lot of time. And I don't play golf. That takes a lot of time." He's also a vegetarian. Not particularly charming, funny, or even outgoing. In fact, it is obvious that he is a big introvert (and nothing wrong with that) but that is not the "typical" fundraiser/BD person.

But Carlyle was established at a time when PE still wasn't the big thing out there and they really differentiated themselves. It was Rubenstein's idea of hiring ex-politicos/leaders/military guys to be senior/be advisors at Carlyle to get deals in defense and that they be based in DC (to be in close sourcing proximity - it helped that both Conway and D'Aniello were working at MCI which was based in Northern Virginia) that made them stand out. His other insight was to get those ex military/politico guys and other famous types to be and/or speak at Carlyle's AGMs. There is a quote somewhere in the press from years ago, in which Rubenstein pretty much says that these things are like parties, and you want everyone to come to your party (we all know what the price of admission is). Simple, clever and not done at the time. In short, he has played a critical role in building the Carlyle brand (love it or hate it).

A number of senior folks I have met and spoken to at Carlyle mention him as being just as important as the other two.

On a side note, I remember leaving the chat with Rubenstein thinking, "how does he spend time with family or have a connection if he's never around?" Simple. He doesn't (I cannot comment on the kids). He and wife have been separated since 2005 and got divorced 2-3 years ago.

In other words, a warning to aspiring titans of finance...

I used to do Asia-Pacific PE (kind of like FoF). Now I do something else but happy to try and answer questions on that stuff.
 

You see this type of structured story with many professionals. It usually follows the path of humble beginning, a story from early in their career, how they failed, how they overcame this failure, and why they passionate about their current role.

I have one, and anytime someone's trying to learn more about me, I use this story. It hits the key points and answers most follow up questions. It's not about telling you're story but conveying traits and experiences the audience will enjoy.

 

I assume it's something he read in the papers back in the 80s, guess the stats have changed since.

 

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