This is hilarious are you kidding?

People's jobs are being cut, IB is shrinking away from full service banks (What you lot call bulge brackets), and you still fucking care about prestige? Kids you're lucky to get ANYTHING in this market. This is market wide, no target, semi target or whatever categories you put yourselves in are safe. This isn't funny or good for anyone - don't joke about it. And FYI - you won't go to a megafund anyways, you'll decide you want to have 8 hours of sleep eventually and chill.

As per the RX interns happy about this - grow up. Just because you'll have more deal flow doesn't mean that this isn't bad. Recessions hit everyone. This is going to hurt so many more people while our government hyper fixates on whether tiktok can control airplanes.

Comments (42)

Controversial
  • Incoming Analyst in IB - Gen
2mo 

I admit I voted democrat, but holy shit this presidency has taught me that they're focused on the most retarded shit ever.

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Funniest
  • Anonymous Monkey's picture
  • Anonymous Monkey
  • Rank: Chimp
2mo 
Anonymous Monkey, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Dude the republicans care about gay people in libraries while an entire financial system is crashing, everyone is so fucking focused on ethical debates theyre ignoring the barrel of the gun that's at their temple

  • Incoming Analyst in IB - Gen
2mo 

Fair point, but between the two parties I've noticed democrats tend to completely ignore financial system problems. Both are morons if we're being honesty

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2mo 
rumanddone, what's your opinion? Comment below:

100% agree. American retail politics are so disconcerted from reality it's insane. Lots of it probably has to do with having a poor education system and a spoiled, narcissistic population. Like imagine trying to explain yield curves to some rando you meet at Walmart. Much easy to bash "Chy-na"or complain about drag queen story hour.

  • 1
2mo 
bawstin, what's your opinion? Comment below:
EverSeeAnOwlMonkey

Dude the republicans care about gay people in libraries while an entire financial system is crashing, everyone is so fucking focused on ethical debates theyre ignoring the barrel of the gun that's at their temple

Dude whose controlling the Senate and Presidency? Dems care about dIvErSiTy and Pride Nights while an entire financial system is crashing, everyone is so fucking focused on ethical debates theyre ignoring the barrel of the gun that's at their temple

2mo 
frenkie, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Tbh all politicians care about is filling their pockets. 99.99% of them are corrupt af and will rile up masses to get votes in their favor. 

1mo 
jackleebusn, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Dems are libshits that ruin cities with their woke virus political correctness. Look what they did to SF - capital of drugs, muggings, carjackings, homeless, you name it. Nice!

Republicans are religious nuts that value assault rifles above anything. Education in the South rivals some 3rd world shithole you vaguely remember from 5th grade geography

Most Helpful
2mo 
IncomingIBDreject, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Where was your sympathy when hundreds if not thousands were laid off in the name of "synergies" on deals you've worked on?

You're only upset because it might hurt you. Compassion was never a factor. Don't keep pretending it is.

Array

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2mo 
Ozymandia, what's your opinion? Comment below:
Analyst 1 in IB - Gen

As per the RX interns happy about this - grow up. Just because you'll have more deal flow doesn't mean that this isn't bad. Recessions hit everyone. This is going to hurt so many more people while our government hyper fixates on whether tiktok can control airplanes.

So... you want a bailout?  I couldn't really figure out the point of your meandering rant, except that you seem to want someone to guarantee that you won't lose your cushy high paying job.

  • 1
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  • Anonymous Monkey's picture
  • Anonymous Monkey
  • Rank: Chimp
2mo 
Anonymous Monkey, what's your opinion? Comment below:

I think he's trying to talk about recruiting if I'm not mistaken

2mo 
Ozymandia, what's your opinion? Comment below:
EverSeeAnOwlMonkey

I think he's trying to talk about recruiting if I'm not mistaken

Hm.  The mention of government focusing on things he doesn't agree with sort of gave me the impression he was hoping Washington would spend time + money to create the conditions which would allow him to stay (or become) employed.  Bailout wasn't the right term... but it's still special pleading

2mo 
IncomingIBDreject, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Precisely. Get ready for the "we need to protect the economy and jobs!" with the solution being billions and billions of taxpayer dollars that should go towards social programs being redirected towards the same Wall Street bankers who have been laying off jobs and consolidating the economy all this time.

Also it seems like all talk about the "free markets" and "capitalism" seem to vanish around this time. When corporate margins were growing, and the average consumer getting hurt all I read was "free markets" non-stop on this forum. Now people are asking for help from big Daddy government. 
 

I remember a phrase you wrote on the past on 08 mentioning that bankers "socialized losses and privatized profits" and it's spot on here. 

Array

  • 1
  • 1
2mo 
Ozymandia, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Yes, it was stomach-turning to read all the venture capitalists and SVB execs and everyone else in their orbit suddenly turn from capitalist pioneers who shouldn't be shackled by government regulation into whining children who suddenly were so crucial to the national economy that they needed a bailout.  I disagree with a great deal of Mr Biden's policies, but his "that's not how capitalism works" line was honestly kind of a zinger, at least compared the usual anodyne fare you get from politicians.

And while I'm glad you recall that, I can't exactly take credit for the phrase!  That one has been around since at least the GFC.

2mo 
Isaiah_53_5 💎🙌💎🙌💎, what's your opinion? Comment below:
Analyst 1 in IB - Gen

People's jobs are being cut, IB is shrinking away from full service banks (What you lot call bulge brackets), and you still fucking care about prestige? Kids you're lucky to get ANYTHING in this market. This is market wide, no target, semi target or whatever categories you put yourselves in are safe. This isn't funny or good for anyone - don't joke about it. And FYI - you won't go to a megafund anyways, you'll decide you want to have 8 hours of sleep eventually and chill.

As per the RX interns happy about this - grow up. Just because you'll have more deal flow doesn't mean that this isn't bad. Recessions hit everyone. This is going to hurt so many more people while our government hyper fixates on whether tiktok can control airplanes.

Not Funny GIFs | Tenor

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • 2
2mo 
PennPalstudent, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Damn he really @ all those RX interns

2mo 
Dazzling-External-29, what's your opinion? Comment below:

2023 INVESTMENT BANKING PRESTIGE RANKINGS - OFFICIAL

  • Tier 1a: Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, PJT, Centerview, Evercore, Qatalyst
  • Tier 1bJP Morgan, Lazard, Moelis, Perella Weinberg Partners
  • Tier 2a: Unemployment
  • Tier 2b: Citi, Bank of America/Merrill Lynch, Credit Suisse, Barclays, Greenhill, Rothschild, Houlihan Lokey, Guggenheim, Macquarie, Harris Williams, Jefferies
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aa

  • 2
  • 2
2mo 
Sassewere, what's your opinion? Comment below:
Dazzling-External-29

2023 INVESTMENT BANKING PRESTIGE RANKINGS - OFFICIAL

  • Tier 1a: Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, PJT, Centerview, Evercore, Qatalyst
  • Tier 1bJP Morgan, Lazard, Moelis, Perella Weinberg Partners
  • Tier 2a: Unemployment
  • Tier 2b: Citi, Bank of America/Merrill Lynch, Credit Suisse, Barclays, Greenhill, Rothschild, Houlihan Lokey, Guggenheim, Macquarie, Harris Williams, Jefferies
  • Tier 2c: Deutsche Bank
  • Tier 3: UBS, Wells Fargo, Nomura, RBC, HSBC, William Blair, Lincoln International, LionTree, Stifel, Oppenheimer, Peter J. Solomon, Robert Baird, Piper Jaffray

aa

CS employees are going to be in tier 2a fairly soon

2mo 
Dazzling-External-29, what's your opinion? Comment below:
Sassewere
Dazzling-External-29

2023 INVESTMENT BANKING PRESTIGE RANKINGS - OFFICIAL

  • Tier 1a: Goldman Sachs, Morgan Stanley, PJT, Centerview, Evercore, Qatalyst
  • Tier 1bJP Morgan, Lazard, Moelis, Perella Weinberg Partners
  • Tier 2a: Unemployment
  • Tier 2b: Citi, Bank of America/Merrill Lynch, Credit Suisse, Barclays, Greenhill, Rothschild, Houlihan Lokey, Guggenheim, Macquarie, Harris Williams, Jefferies
  • Tier 2c: Deutsche Bank
  • Tier 3: UBS, Wells Fargo, Nomura, RBC, HSBC, William Blair, Lincoln International, LionTree, Stifel, Oppenheimer, Peter J. Solomon, Robert Baird, Piper Jaffray

aa

CS employees are going to be in tier 2a fairly soon

Wow, promotion in the ranking, good for them

2mo 
windoflife, what's your opinion? Comment below:
[Comment removed by mod team]
2mo 
andrewlim1, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Did all of us just ignore the fact that McKinsey (consulting firm - the mastermind of layoffs and king of corporate restructuring) laid off their own consultants? That has got to be the funniest shit ever. Stagflation is here to stay. Inflation will be with us for a long time, alongside volatile interest rates, high unemployment, equity market trading flat for a long time (lost decade) , low growth. Yet college kids will still flock to rate-sensitive sectors like investment banking and equity research.

You know what? No one will give a fuck as long as retail investors continue to dump their life savings on 0DTE. The market has become a huge gambling den.

Better go study a real trade or get an engineering major (especially electrical engineering or chemical engineering and go into energy/semiconductor). Rich-cession or white collar recession will be the trend for the next 5 - 10 years. Do something that creates value, not become parasites

1mo 
donuteater555, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Why do you say all this and then go into ER?

1mo 
thevillage, what's your opinion? Comment below:

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1mo 
MonkeyNoise, what's your opinion? Comment below:

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