What makes a woman more attractive to you romantically and how can that woman "win you over"? Do you have a specific look or are you okay with everything as long as you two connect? Let’s be honest, uniqueness is pretty much nonexistent these days but a guy can dream.
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She can fuck like a champ and cook
That’s hard to find but when you do keep her for life
This might be an unexpected answer, but childless, loyalty, genuine love, she can't be dumb as a rock, and she can't be a complete troll. I don't care if she's a 5, and I don't even care if she's fat. I'll wife up a fat girl real quick if she's loyal, genuinely loves me, and has something going on in her head. I go to the gym, and she'll be training too. My habits will rub off on her, and she will lose the weight.
You're never going to find the perfect woman. You have to teach people, especially your women, how to treat you and act. These days it's going to be hard to find a single childless loyal bad bitch that's not damaged and genuinely loves you. They're getting to be like unicorns in America. You kinda have to build your woman. I can teach her all my idiosyncrasies, but she has to be teachable. If you get a childless woman that will ride for you, genuinely loves you, and isn't a complete idiot then hold onto her.
Trust me, you would rather have a loyal fat girl that can lose the weight and learn than a retarded broken bad bitch that doesn't give af about you but looks good in the club and on Instagram. Many basic girls are just a makeover and a workout routine away from being a bad bitch anyway. But you can't make them love you and be loyal to you.
This is tough you have to teach people how to treat you, but that doesn't always workout. You can teach them how to treat you but ultimately they treat you however they will. If they do care for you and respect you, they will treat you as requested, and if not, you'll need to cut your losses and move on.
It's silly to say to want to be with someone who is not as they are. You'd be okay with an overweight girl because you'll workout and your habits will rub off on her? I'm not saying it's not possible, but thinking this fantasy of yours will play out the way you conjured it is ridiculous. You can't change people, only they can change themselves.
Not true, environment > willpower. Scientific fact.
You’re thinking is extremely naive. As someone who works out, it isn’t easy at all to be disciplined (I have faltered from time to time) enough to consistently workout (which is the the key to success) let alone pushing one self to the difficult but workouts that provide tangible results (such as crunches for abs). Maybe she comes with you for one day but then when she’s sore the day after, what makes you think she won’t try to dodge the next gym session? Not to mention that she’d have to change her diet entirely if she’s fat to become fit, which is something you won’t be able to monitor or watch her for.
Additionally in modern society, with the whole movement about “accepting body types” your thoughts are almost certainly going to be seen unfavorably by the woman. Believe me I think the entire thing is stupid and its unbelievable to see how that has crept into fashion modeling, but that’s where society is and the perceived definition of love these days is accepting people for who they are even if the habits (such as poor diet) are damaging.
Overall the danger with your approach is that you become emotionally invested in someone who does not meet your physical needs and you end up between a rock and a wall on whether to continue with a relationship that is only partially fulfilling or cut off a relationship and end up damaging yourself and wasting your time.
"You are thinking"
You make some valid points, but let me explain it a bit more. I've actually done it. Without getting too personal, I did help one of my girlfriends lose about 100lbs. The same dudes that wouldn't mess with her cause she was fat started hitting on her after she lost the weight. Being successful requires discipline, but it also has a lot to do with your environment and support. I don't think I've ever met a woman, or anyone rather that actually wanted to be fat. Not to sound too cringe, but I heard Andrew Tate say something in a video like if someone could build their life like a video game no one would choose things like fat, broke, and weak despite the whole body positivity and loving yourself trend. You can't go in there like a drill sergeant without any patience or empathy.
If a woman loves you, she wants to spend time with you so you can make her spend time with you in the gym. Start small like, "Hey, I'm going to the gym, do you wanna work out with me?" Don't torture her, though. Tell her you need some company on a run, or maybe you need her to spot you even if you don't. Women love to be needed by their man. But honestly you don't even have to do all that, you'll be surprised how eager a woman who loves you will want to be around you as much as they can as long as you don't make them feel like they're being too needy. Positive reinforcement is also important.
If you're living it then she will put pressure on herself to do what she has to do to keep you in her life. You can't be a fat ass yourself telling her to go to the gym while you're on the couch stuffing your face. Have you ever heard these stories where a good girl gets a bad boyfriend, and then she picks up some type of drug addiction. It can work the other way around too. People become like the people they hang around. However, women especially, mimic their boyfriends. If you watch carefully you'll notice your girlfriend will start to talk like you, sometimes they start liking your favorite team, and they pick up some of your habits. It can be very subtle, but they will mirror you.
The diet can be difficult, some people can stop buying bad food cold turkey, and other people need to change slowly. But the big thing is just not buying the food. If it's in your house then you're going to eat it. I would go grocery shopping with her and work with her within reason. Again, if you're going with her then she's spending more time with you. Women really love little shit like that if they really love you, and you can't shame her. Just be like, "I love this, I think you should try that." it works.
You don't just go in there like, "You're going to lose the weight now if you want to be with me!" that won't work at all. But if you're living it then she will adapt. None of this will work if you're not healthy yourself or if she doesn't really give af about you. She has to respect you and see you know what you're talking about and that you're actually living it. Once she actually starts seeing some results then she won't even need your support anymore. The hard part is really getting her, or anyone, to change their habits. But the first time someone says, "You look like you lost some weight," or her pants fit different, or she gets hit on in the street it's a wrap.
I can do it because I go to the gym, and I can work with a big girl. Like I said in another post, you have to ask yourself if you can work with this. If working out is not part of your lifestyle, if you would be too embarrassed to be seen with a fat girl, or if it would repulse you too much then I wouldn't suggest it. She's going to pick up on all of that, and you won't have the patience to have her in your life. It's easier to change your body than to change your feelings about someone. I've been around a lot and having a girl that truly loves you and is loyal to you is second to none. If she has that and all she needs is to lose some weight then I'm down. Love isn't enough to keep a relationship together forever, though.
I think this a bit naive. Some people just don’t know how to workout or how to push themselves. The longer that it has been since they worked out, the tougher it will be to get those workout habits back. If they have never worked out and a girl is in her late 20s with bad habits, the next 10 years for her will make her very unattractive if she isn’t taking good care of herself.
I dated one girl who was in her mid 20s and on first glance, she looked like she was in shape. Her face looked puffier than when she was a cheerleader in college, but she looked ok. Then the first time we hooked up and she undressed, she was wearing this elastic velcro contraption under her shirt that slimmed down her belly. When she took it off, she looked unattractive to me.
She was definitely self conscious about this and I said I would keep dating her if she made an effort to burn the fat off. She agreed. I was cutting at the time too and told her she had to workout 3x per week for 1hr or 30min per day 6x week. I didn’t even ask for her to go to the gym - she could just do calisthenics in her room if she wanted to.
Well, a week went by and she didn’t do shit and I was working out hardcore like 5-7 times per week. I attend multiple gyms and invited her to come with me, but she only came once with me to the gym. It started to piss me off. She had a 9-5 job and had plenty of time to get in shape, but would typically go to the bar after work and get lots of beers and fried mozzarella sticks and get fatter. She would always say “I don’t have time to workout today, I’ll do it tomorrow.”
So I created this spreadsheet on Excel to track her workouts for a month and printed it out and put it on her fridge. I told her if she doesn’t make her workouts over the month, I’m breaking up with her. Anddddd she didn’t work out once over this month period. She always said she was too busy, yet only worked 40hrs per week and went to the bar every day. And I was basically offering to be her free personal trainer with free gym access, but she could never get in the habit.
So I was on the path to get in the best shape of my life and she was just getting fatter and fatter. I broke up with her after her month of not doing jack shit as it was a sign of things to come.
Moral of the story - it’s best to find and date chicks who already are motivated to workout. If a girl has bad habits at 25, she will probably be 10x worse at 35 and in marriage. I think girls are generally most moldable 21 - 25 if they don’t know how to push themselves and at 25 - 30 become more set in their ways (for bad or for good) and at 35+ it is definitely going to be hard to teach the old pony new tricks. It’s possible, but improbable if the girl has not developed good habits by then.
My last two girlfriends were good athletes and we never had to fight about staying in shape and stuff. Healthy body, healthy mind.
The least important trait is her "career" and her ambition
1. Tits that I can actually grab. I was an ass man for a long time, but now I look at tits before anything else.
2. Don't be fat.
3. Be obsessed about me, but don't cross my boundaries.
4. Know that my work will always come first and that I will take care of you if you support me.
5. Be kind and have some humility.
Impossible to come by these days sadly. The whole west is brainwashed by this whole woke feminist propaganda. MS me all you want you cucks.
I'm telling you, a lot of guys that say they don't mess with fat chicks will get with a girl they think is hot, date her, maybe marry her, and watch her get fat. Then they're afraid to even tell her she's fat so they end up with a fat chick anyway. I'll take a fat chick and help her lose the weight in a year and keep it off.
But all I'm really saying is look for a real woman that's down for you. If she's a 10 then that's great, but she probably won't be. Don't dismiss a woman that genuinely loves you and wants to be a part of your life because she has some flaws that can be corrected. Ask yourself if you can work with her. Everyone has flaws, and some people just need someone to show them a better way to live.
You might think I'm lying, but I'll tell the story anyway. There was a basic girl that went to my high school. No one was really checking for her at all. She wasn't fat, but she was quiet and pretty plain. You wouldn't really notice her if she entered a room. I never looked twice at her.
She went off to college and about a year later she was posing for Playboy and a-list celebrities were sending her dick pics. It just took her a little longer to bring out what was always there. I think every guy has met a woman that could be like that, but they're too busy looking for perfection.
This dude works at either Apollo or Alix.
I’m not sure if you’ve been an athlete your whole life or something but becoming fit is a major life change. As a result I’ve had to modify:
Sleeping hours (ensure I get adequate daily sleep)
Diet (cut out most processed foods, drink a lot of water instead of sodas)
Social Life (suffers due to sleeping hours plus being unwilling to negotiate with workout times)
Career (I’ve come to realize in finance not every job allows the ability to be fit hence a career sacrifice is required)
Comfort: Especially when starting out my muscles would be sore limiting the amount it physical activity I could do after.
The fact you assume any girl you find will magically make these life-altering sacrifices is startling and inaccurate. Don’t you know how much free literature and videos exists regarding proper dieting, fitness, and workout routines? Much more than any individual could reasonably consume in a lifetime yet still a majority of the US population is overweight. It’s a discipline/sacrifice issue. People are unwilling to give the sacrifices necessary to be fit and disciplined enough to consistently workout.
Your high school example isn’t analogous since you never say she was fat. You just said she was introverted and was plain (which I assume you mean lacks class). Providing someone nice clothes and telling them to wear it or providing various cutleries and teaching them to cut meat with a knife and fork is orders of magnitude easier (to a point the analogy is entirely invalid) than instilling the qualities necessary to become fit in someone.
Finally, girls who become fat later on typically either didn’t workout much and were coasting off of youthfulness/genetics or worked out for extrinsic reasons that diminished over time (such as being an athlete). If you can find someone who is intrinsically interested, does bodybuilding completions and or models, the dynamic drastically shifts and the chances she becomes fat post-marriage goes down quite a bit.
I will say that at least for me the answer is decency and maturity. When you want to settle down, the most important thing is stability and stability is much easier to achieve with a woman who is decent, proper and mature. Let me make my point quickly, and please note that everything I say also applies to men. Suppose you have two women, let's call them Allison and Becca. They both are human beings and as such they have sexual desires to satisfy. A decided to satisfy those sexual needs in her 20s by finding good men and forming strong long-term relationships. As such she has just a few sexual partners, and may even have none at all if no man ever reached her standards. B decided to satisfy those sexual needs in her 20s by having no standards, having one-day or even on-and-off relationships with any man with a functional penis who was in a 1 km radius from her. As such, she now has dozens and perhaps hundreds of sexual partners.
Now, imagine a relationship with these girls. Who do you think has a higher probability of cheating on you or otherwise compromising your relationship in some way? The one who quite literally cannot keep it in her pants, or the one that is very conservative and selective?
It is as simple as that. Simple math. As a man, you want to reduce the probability that your partner may be disloyal in the future. That is why I am nice to all women, but if I learn that in a woman's past there was a lot of 'jumping around', I immediately mark them as non-existent in terms of sexual desirability. I quite literally would not touch them with a ten foot pole. And as for the men who for some reason end up marrying these immature women, I have zero respect for them and WILL openly mock them. Please note, the same goes for you ladies. Don't get yourselves a man who can't keep it in his pants because then boy will you be getting cheated on A LOT.
There’s more Bs than As in the world specially during this TikTok generation. Asking for A is asking for a unicorn. It’s not impossible but it’s very very rare
If you see yourself as a high quality man, you should be able to catch an A. I have an A, and my wealthy friends have wealthy A's (as far as I know, maybe wealthy girls have their version of the Epstein Island to do fucked up shit, who knows). But yes, A's and scarce hence their high market value but I would assume that the reason you are destroying your psychological well-being in IB is to become a high-value man yourself and therefore you should be able to get an A.
Not a headache / Cooperative
Disciplined / Knows how to control emotions when needed
Cute
No "career woman boss babe" vibe
When it comes to appearance do you guys have a specific type or you like everything? Some of my friends are into latinas and so am i lol but if we click, I'm open to all races for sure
I like White/Arab/Latina. Not too skinny but not obese.
Slim thick it is
I just got married and I would say that a compatible sense of humor is very important.
I don’t quite understand the people saying that skinny/fat doesn’t matter if they have X trait - you see appearance up front not X trait so you’re either into a body type or not.
I’m surprised by people who don’t care about their partner’s career as well. My wife has a professional career and makes great money and contributes financially to our lifestyle / future goals. A lot of relationships fail for financial reasons.
Fair
Regarding your career question I think there are a few things
1) Some guys prefer a more relaxed supportive girl for emotional reasons
If we are defining “career” in the context of WSO, then career means more than just a job (which I’m sure almost everyone would see as a baseline requirement) but a high powered while collar professional job such as law, finance, consulting, medicine, etc which has more stress and requires longer hours. In such jobs as you know when you have a bad stretch it impacts you. Personally I find myself irritable. depressed, and voicing my difficulties with work to friends. I’m sure you’ve been in this spot also. And bad stretches can last several weeks, even months. Some people want to come home to a girl who has time for them, is supportive and provides the emotional help required to get through the rough stretch as opposed to coming home to an equally overworked, irritable, depressed girl (although others would argue empathy develops easier when both suffer equivalently).
2) Not everyone has the same long term goals
Clearly point 1 while focusing on the emotional aspect does not focus on the financial aspect. While some may argue that the emotional support of a girl plays a decent role in a man being able to climb the corporate ladder. There’s no denying that living off a single income in Manhattan is difficult unless the man makes serious income . If a guy is in Corp Dev making $200k/year, then yes having a partner who earns equivalent is almost a requirement. Whereas a PM clearing 7 figures could very well be able to support the family on his contributions alone. Additionally, you have to factor in that not everyone may decide to stay in NYC long term. If the corp dev guy moves to some tier 4 city that $200k salary will provide him with a comfortable lifestyle.
ass
That’s mandatory for every man lol
Eh, I prefer a more balanced body type as opposed to curves.
Definitely love a girl who's incredibly ambitious. That's one of the biggest factors in terms of attractive personality traits for me. I've always sought after the "Power Couple" dynamic where we both help each other grow and achieve goals instead of the house-wife/bread-winner dynamic. Completely see both sides but personally, I just enjoy it when the girl I'm seeing is passionate about what she does and has really detailed and difficult goals.
And also has a huge ass.
That and not a TikTok addict.
1) doesn't have bad breath 2) wouldn't be embarrassed to bring her around friends/coworkers/family 3) fit body 4) mental stability/grit
Loyalty and beauty!
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