28 Comments
 

Flowers, Dinner

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 
Best Response

What the hell does her being a banker have to do with anything? Christ, don’t you people have any imagination? Take her out to a nice restaurant, buy her something nice that might make her happy, based on something she’s mentioned, and try to make at least a few hours of her week enjoyable.

What’s next, “what sort of toothbrush to use for 2nd year analyst @ JPM?” Fucking hell.

"When you stop striving for perfection, you might as well be dead."
 

Colgate is for associates. 2nd year analysts should be using the one from their dentist. By this point they should have enough time to brush their teeth, but not enough time to purchase anything of quality. Sonicare is for VP and up.

Only two sources I trust, Glenn Beck and singing woodland creatures.
 

Actually no.. I have no imagination. That's why I started this thread. Also.. why I chose banking.

But lets think about this... - anything material e.g. jewelry, handbag, clothing, etc... is pointless. She already has whatever she wants. - anything that requires time e.g. books, surprise weekend trip someplace, tickets to a show, etc... is impractical or too risky. - generally, she hates surprises. I bet most banker girls (and guys) probably do.. - also, this shouldn't come as a surprise, but she's not the most sentimental/romantic (in the latin sense) person so extra personal/inside joke type gifts aren't suuuper easy to come up with..

^ so yeah, this kinda rules out a lot of things... also just shooting the shit here and looking for funny stories, ideas, etc... so ease up bro.

 

Every girl I've ever met claimed they hated surprises.

This is false.

They hate the wrong sort of surprises.

She's never once mentioned something she'd like to have, or a problem she's having in life that she'd like to have fixed, or a place she'd like to go, or anything? Surely there must be something. I mean...if she literally has no preferences or interests or time for anything at all...then I suppose she won't mind if you don't get her anything at all.

"When you stop striving for perfection, you might as well be dead."
 

Indeed. Stop by Walgreen's beforehand and pick up a couple of those little box wines to refill that little mug.

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

Classy and traditional, I like it. However, everyone knows that Dimon signed calculators are kind of like a promise ring, meaningless. Getting a Blankfein signed BA II Plus shows you truly care.

Only two sources I trust, Glenn Beck and singing woodland creatures.
 

One of the most epic things a boyfriend did for me was have a huge bouquet of long-stem roses delivered to my desk morning of my birthday. Just in time to be seen by all the bosses and co-workers. Best part was that it inspired extra respect from the bosses both for me and the guy and sent a wave of mass envy through the girls. Left it an extra day in the office to let the message sink in. Felt good to flaunt thatDo it and you'll get bonus points from the girl and make you look like one awesome beau.

Gifts-wise, always best to play to her personal interests outside the office. Don't go for the cliched designer items. She can perfectly afford it on her own. You buying them for her holds a hint that you think she's not payed well enough or whatnot. A female banker won't appreciate it. To give an example, I love floral art. The boyfriend researched it and located a old manuscript on Dutch flower painting and gave it to me alongside another item playing to my personal interest. So ask yourself what she's personally interested in and do some research. It will be unexpected and shows that you care about HER.

 

Look, I'm older and more experienced, and NOT one of those deranged feminist bankers as many of my peers are. Ask yourself if the girl fits into the latter category, and if so definitely don't do it. She'll probably either be offended or eat them... or both

These things are only embarrassing to a girl who gets a weak flower display. Then it's cringe-worthy to everybody. Clearly signifies that she's not worth any more than that. The amount spent is directly proportional to amount of respect it will generate from the bosses.

 

You don't know what to buy your girlfriend for her birthday and you don't know anything about her beyond her job?

What the hell man.

 

Qui laudantium quas et blanditiis. Earum unde tenetur dicta voluptatem. Illum in nemo expedita in. Cum ut qui asperiores dignissimos et.

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