Cold Emailing Private Equity Firms

Hi, I wrote up this cold "calling" email for a PE summer Intern gig.

Could you please give me some feedback on it.

Thanks

Dear [Enter Name],

I would like to express my interest in an internship opportunity at [Private Equity Firm Name] as a summer analyst. I have completed an Internship in the field of M&A as well as consulting and am starting an Internship with Deutsche Bank in January. Currently, I am completing my third semester of the undergraduate finance program at the xxxxx.

The area of PE combines both my passions; it is a mix of entrepreneurialism coupled with finance and modeling.

During my two internships I gained experience in financial modeling and the field of strategy consulting. As to my entrepreneurial background, I used to run a small business buying, developing, and selling websites; basically micro PE with websites. And am currently working on a service which analyzing online sentiment in regards to a consumer oriented company and its product. With the skill sets I am developing, I am looking to hit the ground running and learn more about the private equity industry. I have attached my resume for your review and look forward to hearing from you.

If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to contact me via email or by phone.

Best,
xxxxx