Can you critique my cold email?

Hello Adam,


I am looking for career advice to enter equity research. I'm a second year BA Accounting and Finance student at ... university. I was hoping to get a call with you, so you could tell me about your time in investment research.


Please let me know if you are available to speak sometime this Thursday afternoon. 


Thank you,

Zack ...

M: ###

Li: www.linkedin.com/in/firstlast

 

Little too generic, I would open with, “I’m a [X year] student at [university] interested in breaking into Industry.”

Then, I would immediately bring up something that you two have in common, same school, same club, etc. or try to find a natural way to weave it into your intro. Then ask for their availability to get on a call. I used to try to make it easier for them by listing out timeframes in the next week and asking if any of those worked for them to hop on for a quick call. 
 

It’s more effective to start with reaching out to people who have something in common with you, they’re more likely to respond. 

 

I agree. Either bringing up something you have in common or mentioning something that is specific to their profile (perhaps they were featured on Bloomberg or FT article recently, or maybe you read something they reposted on LinkedIn). The point is to make the solicitation special to them and to use it as a conversation starter.

 
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