"I follow the stock market"

ImNoBanker's picture
Rank: Baboon | 128

I am a current college student, and I figured some of you would get a kick out of this.

So, my roommate and I are both studying finance going into our senior year. Wait, I should rephrase that----I AM studying finance, my roommate shows up to class. Anyways, today during one of our lectures, he made a complete fool of himself while once again pretending that he has even the slightest clue what he's talking about. Long story short, this kid was asked to explain the basic process of computing WACC given a desired company, and I swear to god he said "I don't have my calculator today, so I'm not sure of the top of my head." I can assume he was talking about his T-89, which is primarily used to discount coupon pmnts(In our course atleast).

Can you guys believe he actually thinks he's headed to the street upon graduation? He graduates next fall.

To make things worse, he is your typical kid who watched wolf of wall street once and immediately changed his major from Management to Finance. He inherited a few shares of AAPL from his grandpa, so he is CONSTANTLY acting as if he is doing valuations on apple while in class, just so the few girls in our course can see, I'm sure. On top of that, he fails MISERABLY on every exam(<70%). Keep in mind we are from a non target so students receiving 100% on exams is actually pretty common for our major. What annoys me is that he is constantly tweeting, snapping, and posting on facebook any recent activity in the market. For example, snap-chatting pictures of the DOW on positive days with the caption "Dow is busting". For some odd reason, he believes GPA doesn't matter (2.6) so he is out at the bars 4 nights of the week then complains when he doesn't do well on an exam.

How many of you know someone who literally defines the "Fake it till you Make it" role?

BTW, he once told our professor he couldn't work on excel efficiently because he forgot his MOUSE at home that day. HIS FUCKING MOUSE.

Rant over.

Comments (23)

Apr 21, 2017

Shouldn't you be studying?

    • 8
Apr 21, 2017

Nice comment change there

    • 1
Apr 21, 2017

Shouldn't you be working?

    • 2
    • 1
Apr 21, 2017

See, I've already made it somewhere. You still need to, now go study or you'll need to find the best deal on your brown suits.

Apr 21, 2017

LOL. What do you mean he's going to the street? Which firm?

Apr 21, 2017

He THINKS he's going to the street. He has applied to just about every well known firm that has an IB department on the east coast and Chicago. I think he had one pre-interview phone screening and he actually got hung up on.

Apr 21, 2017

You're sassy. Also, your username is fitting.

    • 1
Apr 21, 2017

You took the time to make a thread over this? You care way too much.

    • 5
Apr 21, 2017

It took me three minutes to type this(I am on my thirty minute study break). I don't care too much, I just wanted to share an experience that not many people outside of finance would understand.

Apr 21, 2017

Not to discount the experience, but there are fools like this in every industry. Don't think only those "in finance" can relate to dealing with wonderfully oblivious human beings.

Apr 21, 2017

Just lol at OP thinking he's going to "the street" next year. Maybe in the literal sense.

Apr 21, 2017

Oh I thought you meant he got an offer lol. Why are you so mad about this? If he got a Blackstone or bridge water offer then you can be salty hahaha.

Apr 21, 2017

It sounds like he'll fit right in at his trading desk.

Apr 21, 2017

I get you don't like your roommate, but since ya'll are both at non-targets. Maybe you should give him some guidance and pointers, since it seems like you have it all figured out.

Apr 21, 2017

Never once implied I had it "all figured out".

Apr 21, 2017

Go home and get your shine box.

Best Response
Apr 21, 2017

Ops roommate is banging all the girls op wants to bang

    • 13
Apr 21, 2017

Nothing is more entertaining than seeing acquaintances on Facebook post about their penny stock gains.

Apr 21, 2017

why are you upset over this?

    • 2
Apr 21, 2017

coming from a non finance background and still early in the game, one thing i got out of this thread is the WACC calculation... google WACC calculation..

Apr 21, 2017

I read this in an intensely effeminate voice, much better read

    • 1
Apr 21, 2017
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