Sep 13, 2018

What's wrong with my cold email?

I'm only getting around a 15% response rate for my emails and I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong or if this is expected from cold emails.

Subject Line: XXX university student seeking career information or XXX university student reaching out (for alumni)

Body:
Hello Mr/Ms,

My name is XXX and I am a [grade level] majoring in Finance at the XXX university. I am interested to learn more about investment banking and [Firm Name] in particular. Would you have some time next week for a quick call? I would appreciate the chance to learn about your experiences and any advice you could give me.

Sincerely,
My name

Any critiques are appreciated

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12 Comments

O

5y

Hi John-Jacobs1, any of these topics helpful:

Check my cold e-mail template for VC/Start-ups Thanks, [My name and surname]---------------------- VC cold e-mail start up ... Hey. I am about to send cold e-mails- mostly to VCs- for an Analyst role. Tell me what do you ... think about my template. Any revisions appreciated.------------------------- Hello Name, I am writing ...
How to Title Cold E-mails / InMails? & Salutations contact after I research them and their firm, but how would you title these e-mails and InMails? Right ... I think that I have the body of my written cold contact down, and I obviously modify it for every ... don't have anything to actually thank them for yet. And using it repeatedly with the same person ...
E-mailing Higher Ups about Job Opportunity have to send an email (with your cover letter and resume) to their HR e-mail and then they get back to ... at the company because my company has them in our buyer database. Is it acceptable to e-mail one of ... you. Is there a way to go around this? I have the e-mail to the Managing Director and some higher ups ...
Cold e-mail CEO... one wanted to hear me out- I cold e-mail the head of sales in the company. He was impressed with my ... e-mail and told me he would see me to see what i have to say. I gave it 100% but I guess it wasn't ... I have what it takes to succeed here. I want to e-mail him again, but not quiet sure what to say or what ...
A different kind of cold e-mail Yes, I realize there are many posts about cold emailing and I think I have the basics down, but ... I applied a couple of weeks ago for a position with a major American company here and got an email back ... responds, turn the conversation towards that specific job... cold email ...
Networking e-mail question email E-mail cold email ... several people the same e-mail? What if they are the same firm? Different firm? Is there a good way to ... 5 sentences-be honest with them. So would something like this be ok "My name is XXX XXX and I noticed you ...
Alumni Cold e-mail Trying to get a fall IB internship. Here is my Cold E-mail template that I started using today. No ... schedule, but I would sincerely appreciate an opportunity to speak with you for 15 minutes sometime within ...
Petty and uninteresting e-mail format question For some firms with [email protected] e-mail addresses. In this case Evercore... What if ... safe....) and I am afraid the e-mail will not get to him. This is the most petty post I've written ... here. Thanks guys. cold email ...
More suggestions...

Or maybe the following users have something to say: masters Taylor-Coulter straightnochaser

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PE

5y

I would change the subject line to something shorter like "quick talk" or "introduction". However, 15% is a good response rate and the email looks good so just keep going

Authored by: Certified Private Equity Professional - Vice PresidentCertified Private Equity Pro

IB

5y

Alright thank you.

O

5y

No matter how good a cold email is its still pretty hard to get even a majority of people to respond to it.

CO

5y

I get you’re going for volume but mention something about that person’s career path that would endear them to your own. 100s of these come through every year.

Authored by: Certified Consulting Professional - Engagement ManagerCertified Consulting Pro

IB

5y

How would I do that?

theaccountingmajor

AC

5y

It's short and sweet - which is good. But maybe a sentence or two about how you know them, or any sort of commonality to make them somewhat interested in helping you would be a nice touch

Clientele Effect Theory Dividend Policy

IB

5y

I don't really have anything in common with the people I am emailing. I had a line about "I found your information through Linkedin" but it seemed a little bit generic and unnecessary. Do you have any suggestions for a sentence to get people a little more interested?

theaccountingmajor

AC

5y

Literally anything - I noticed the path you've followed resembles the one I plan to take, maybe?

aspiringcoolperson

RE

5y

Add 1-2 lines that are customized to that person. It shows that you're not just copying/pasting the same email to everyone else.

Politely follow up after a week or so because maybe they did see it but forgot to respond. If they still don't reply, move on.

Authored by: Certified Real Estate Professional - 2nd Year AssociateCertified Real Estate Pro

IB

5y

Do you have an example of a customization? I didn't want to be overly personal or say something that might trip me up so I'm sort of lost as to what I should put.

O

5y

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