Alumni Cold e-mail

Trying to get a fall IB internship. Here is my Cold E-mail template that I started using today. No responses so far :[. Thoughts?

"I am a rising junior at semi-target currently interning in Corp 500 FP&A. As someone learning more about finance and financial markets through this internship, I am heavily interested in the world of Mergers & Acquisitions. At this time, I would like to learn more about your experiences in the industry and your role as [position] at [firm].

I understand that you may have a busy schedule, but I would sincerely appreciate an opportunity to speak with you for 15 minutes sometime within the next week. Of course, I am more than happy to accommodate whatever time works best for you."

Thanks!

30 Comments
 
Best Response

What's your subject header? Mine was always [school name] student seeking advice or something like that. Maybe mention that you found their contact information through the alumni network or whatever, and don't say "sometime within the next week." Change it to "in the near future" or something less definite. I always said rising [major] junior too, that could help if it's relevant. I got a ton of responses.

 

the phrase "heavily interested" seems awkward to me. maybe "deeply interested" or "I have grown a strong interest"

"My name's Ralph Cox, and I'm from where ever's not gonna get me hit"
 

also, if you said you started using it today, that doesn't mean its not working. Ive sent emails and gotten responses 1-2 weeks after i sent it. You aren't going to get a response in the same day from a banker, it takes time. and if they don't respond in 10-14 days, follow up with another email. you're on the right track though

"My name's Ralph Cox, and I'm from where ever's not gonna get me hit"
 

Instead of saying "the world of Mergers & Acquisitions", just say "investment banking" ("As someone learning more about finance and financial markets through this internship, I have developed a strong interest in investment banking.") Not all IB is M&A (unless of course, you are targeting M&A boutiques, but best to be on the safe side). Also echo TechBanking's comment.

Something that people are sometimes interested in is how you found them, so you might say take out the "At this time" and replace it with something like "I came across your profile on the [alumni directory or wherever you got their contact info], and I would like to learn more about your experiences in the industry and your role as [position] at Firm."

 

A few pointers for cold e-mail: - State your connection and/or how you got their contact info. - Keep it brief (you have this down). - I know others have said vague dates are better, but I had some of my best luck when identifying one or two time windows (e.g. I am available Thursday anytime before noon or Monday all day). Busy people sometimes prefer to have options narrowed down to make decisions easier. - I also like to include a request for follow up (I.e. you're telling them what you want). Something like "please let me know if you have availability and I will gladly accommodate your schedule."

Just my .02.

 

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