Feeling insecure surrounded by fancy college grads
Hey all - to give some context, I work as a senior analyst in an alternative investment fund. I didn't go to college full time (did it by correspondence) and began working full-time from 18 (I'm 30 now). I pursued one of those professional certifications (CPA) and cleared it after a couple attempts. Recently, I participated in a couple of recruitment drives and got to interact with a lot of college grads.
Man, these guys keep bringing up their college name (all target-schools) and GPA in every two sentences. Was talking to a group of them about my firm and what I do and one jerk was like "oh I went to [target school] for my undergrad, interned at [IB firm 1, PE firm 1, VC firm 1] and then bagged a PPO. Then I decided to do something with my life and went to [target Ivy league] for my MBA. What did you do again?"
It was just one comment. But it made me feel two inches tall. Yes, I didn't have a fancy college experience (hell, any college experience). Yes I didn't know the "grind" about getting into the best college clubs and "winning at internships". Yes I didn't have an MBA diploma on my wall.
But I did my job well enough that my boss sent me (and not the other college grads in my firm) to the recruitment drive. I googled on how to handle these situations and be the bigger man. But guys, do ya'll have some tips on how to deal with these posers?
I go to a top school in the UK and when I am here nearly everyone I meet that has a good internship has been privately educated. I am one of the few from a public school and a relativly lower middle class background, when they talk about the annual ski trips they did with school or going to winter balls in tux's or bragging about how their dad's network helped them I sit back and reflect for a minute. I got here without all of this and managed to break into IB. If you let these insecure losers comments get to you do some reflection on your journey and take it with some pride.
Hey - thanks for the reply man. Ironically, one of their common points was "Where do you summer / winter?". Sorry - I got a bit rattled as this was my first time being in that type of environment. But this attitude will not get them far - Let's hope they learn this the hard way.
For sure, All the best bro. Don't let it drag you down. I am assuming your in HF/PC so you should be able to do an MBA if you really want but your at the exit option so I don't think you need to bother.
I felt this when I first started working at a top investment bank having come from a farm town of 4k people in the Midwest and a non-target public university. Once you start the job, where you went to school doesn't matter at all. Just outwork them and you will find out quickly that these degrees do not give them the edge you think it does.
One thing might be helpful is recognizing that the majority of the time these guys aren’t trying to put you down or intentionally being jerks. In a professional context running through relevant academic and professional background quickly is a pretty standard baseline comment. (Ie that anecdote you gave sounds to me like he was just telling you some professionally relevant facts about himself and then inviting you to do the same—he can’t be expected to know that was a sore spot for you when it’s a common discussion topic in that type of setting).
Now ofc if they constantly are like yukking it up about how much fun they had at their eating club that’s one thing but if not they might not have bad intentions with those comments. Not saying this to invalidate your feelings at all just wanted to provide some perspective since you’ve worked so hard to get where you are and you’re gonna run into ppl like this more and more and being able to understand and communicate with them vs seeing them as only jerks will probably help you. Of course I am not there so I could be totally misreading stuff in which case feel free to ignore.
You do realize you have the job and work at the firm these guys are interested in at the recruiting event?? Literally who cares you’ve already gone to school and you have a professional designation and years of job experience. Why give a shit what some 21 year old says his GPA is or some crap like that. You’re already there and they are just trying to prove that they are worthy to get there.
The way I approach these is by thinking such things are not of substance, rather they are just some random thing said by a random person who doesn't know me. What the person told you doesn't reflect on your abilities/work ethic in any way, so why feel bad about what the person told you? If the person would have called you stupid for example, then you do what Intern in IB - M&A said above: Am I actually stupid? I am not, because I was sent to this event by my manager, therefore no reason to feel bad. Imo, rationalising things helps a lot.
I agree with Intern in IB - M&A who studies in the UK (like myself). During my internship, I noticed several unbearable people like interns who would belittle interns who interned in non-FO roles or less worthy FO roles. Literally nobody at the bank did this, instead the IB intern's manager took time to talk to the Middle office intern over a coffee. I'm now doing a masters at a London university and its a similar experience to yours and so on. Some of these people have little self awareness. Of course some people talk about things like "Where do you summer / winter?" and the amount of land they inherited from Grandpa Bartholomew, but just bringing it up with a randomly with people who are not interested in that is just lack of manners/awareness.
I’m from the us so maybe it’s different, but anyone who brings their GPA up in casual conversation is a cunt imo
Upgrade your mentality from impostor syndrome to infiltrator syndrome.
I went to a fancy school for the Masters. But I come from a very normal background and had to grind to get where I am. Over this time frame I've realised your background does not really matter. There can be really posh guys with a humble attitude and really people from humble backgrounds with posh attitudes.
At work after a couple of years of work no one really bring sup their background and if people do I simply state what teh fuck have they been doing with their life if with all the advantages they are now at the same level that I am. :)
Quidem porro amet ab dolorem sit maxime. Dicta eaque doloremque a tempore aut molestiae. Rerum voluptatem animi reprehenderit aut soluta nesciunt omnis. Modi nulla deserunt corporis excepturi.
A tempora non ut suscipit. Ut fugiat maxime molestiae ut. Odit impedit inventore velit et aut et. Ipsa rem cum fugit itaque cum ut repudiandae in. Quia et officiis eum eligendi ea. Culpa non veniam quisquam pariatur voluptatibus asperiores repudiandae. Suscipit totam eaque debitis atque iste aperiam sit molestiae. Ea non enim illum iusto odio occaecati iste.
Quae cupiditate tempora a et rerum a aut. Repudiandae dolor eius nisi corporis nobis beatae eos. Voluptatem sit odit eaque nobis voluptatibus dolorem veniam.
Officia eos delectus mollitia eum rerum. Error nihil ipsum illum sequi et facere. Eligendi illo sit quam fuga minima ipsam. Incidunt quam beatae rem aut eius cumque blanditiis.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...