Imposter Syndrome!!!!!
Hi you guys. I'm A1, just started out in markets. I have always had imposter syndrome but my self esteem has taken a hit ever since I started work. I think it comes from the fact that my bank does not have an analyst class and I am the only analyst (junior most person) that has joined this year. Everyone else is SVP or above. The learning curve is really steep and I'm trying my best. But I keep doubting myself. I keep thinking I'm not good enough. Despite getting good feedback, I always feel like I have done an average job. How do I get over this constant nagging feeling that is weighing me down.
Also I have to say the culture at my bank is such that I absolutely cannot speak to anyone about how I feel because I think it makes me look weak. I'm starting to see a therapist soon about this but seriously how did you guys get through this.
Just ask people for feedback. If they say good job, just push for real feedback. You can say “thanks, but I would really appreciate you think my job was good and you are happy with it, but I’m a person that wants to give 100% and be ranked at the top bucket - so it would be great if you could give me a couple of things you’d suggest me doing or improving on to move from “good” to “outstanding”. If the guy can’t think of anything, then you are doing really good. If he gives you stupid things, then your are good. If he has a lot of feedback or anything is fundamental, then it may be that you really have areas for improvement.
Are you in IB or S&T? Seems like you’re overthinking it, especially since you’re getting good reviews
Anyways, chill out, you’re a 1st year analyst in a bank, tens of thousands of people are doing the same thing, you might have made it to some extent for popular culture, but you’re not exactly a rocket scientist. No importer syndrome to be had. Just try to learn and you’ll be just fine.
Also if it came to the point where you have to see a therapist rather than speak to your team, this is a big firm wide issue, I’m sure they’d rather spend 10mn with you rather than have you leave in 3 months. Would speak to one of the friendlier guys over coffee if possible or else ask to have a quick zoom catchup
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