Investment bankers, do you expect your partner to have as prestigious a job as you do?

I know how difficult to get a job in the field and although I'm on the right way to have a good career I'm still in college and this guy I'm hoping to get serious with just got a job as a securities analyst at GS and I feel like he's on a different level.

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type in goldman securities analyst on linkedin and look at the women he'll be working with.. i would say that should be your primary concern

 

I think the questions you should be asking yourself are about your self worth and not if someone is automatically better than you because they have a shiny new job. I understand if you're working as a cleaning staff member and he's a brain surgeon that your lifestyles/expectations may differ but that's far from the case here. No-one worth your time in the long run would look to 'upgrade' from you depending on their job.

 

I'd rather they do something that makes them happy. As long as they're comfortable and understanding of my schedule. I would hope the money I make from slaving the fuck away gives them the liberty to pursue their passions.

Dayman?
 

In my experience when it comes to dating the big differences and barriers don't come from the "prestige" of the job but more with lifestyle expectations. As bankers we have a solid income and are typically better off financially than most people, which gives us some leeway with our spending. I consider myself to be quite frugal but with the things I enjoy doing I'm generally not going to worry about how much it costs, where spending a few hundred dollars at dinner may not be a big deal to me it could be for someone I'm dating. Unless they're the kind of douche that thinks prestige matters you'll be fine as long your expectations are in line.

 

So my thoughts on this have changed over time. I used to not care at all what my SO did as long as it was something that made them happy. After two rather lengthy relationships (2 years or more) came to an end and I did some reflection, there is a certain amount of income when there is a big enough income and/or preftige gap. Your life is substantially different than theirs and there is a lot that they simply won't understand. I think it can work, but I'm not going to sugar coat it and tell you it's easy. Looking forward, I don't think the next one necessarily needs to work in finance at my same level to avoid such friction, but I do think their is some sort of parity that needs to exist.

 

Here’s my perspective - they need to be somebody who is driven and dedicated to whatever profession they are in, regardless of if it is “prestigious” or not.

Naturally, people with a lot of drive / ambition tend to self select into fields like finance, law, consulting, medicine, etc. Being a teacher isn’t considered “prestigious” on these forums, but I’d be fine having my SO pursue that as a career as long as they are passionate about being the best teacher they can be. Just don’t think I’d be able to handle somebody that just wants to “coast” forever.

 

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