Investment Banks as Football Clubs

GS = Real Madrid. Biggest name in their respective worlds, nothing else to say.

MS = Barcelona. Another enormous name but seen as 2nd to Real Madrid

JPM = Manchester United. One of the biggest names in the world. Doesn't have as many accolades as the above 2 but still competes on a name brand basis.

BofA = Bayern Munich. Very solid name who always competes at the top level, although not seen as big as the above 3.

Citi = Liverpool. Another very solid name who regularly competes at the top level.

Evercore = Manchester City. New kid on the block with a lot of money who now competes at the highest level.

PJT Partners = PSG. Similar story to above but not quite as big.

Lazard = Chelsea. Solid name who performs well - also pays a lot of money similar to the above 2.

Barclays = Juventus. Usually are around competing at the highest level but never really the best.

Rothschild = Arsenal. Performs well domestically but doesn't really do anything outside of it's home market.

Jefferies = Dortmund. Somehow always manages to punch above their weight but so far hasn't been able to break into the big leagues.

UBS = Spurs. They're pretty big but they just embarrass themselves when competing with the best.

Deutsche Bank = Atletico Madrid. Similar story to above. They're pretty big and often compete at the top level but inevitably they end up embarrassing themselves.

Wells Fargo = AC Milan. A huge name but have just fell off now.

HSBC = Inter. Again a huge name but are largely irrelevant now.

CVP/Qatalyst/FTP = Newcastle. New names with a ton of money to spend - will be amongst the biggest soon enough.

BNP Paribas = Marseille. Big name in their own country but irrelevant on the global stage.

SocGen = Lyon. Similar story to above.

Nomura = Everton. Both sizable names who embarrass themselves.

Moelis/PWP = RB Leipzig. New name with money but not on the level of EVR/PJT

HL = Ajax. Level below the top names but outperforms in certain niches (Rx/UCL).

RBC = Benfica. Top name in their respective countries but a cut below the top global players.

Mediobanca = Napoli. Big in Italy but irrelevant on the global stage.

MUFG = Roma. Both mid.

Mizuho = Lazio. Both mid.

Raine Group = Sevilla. Both should be irrelevant but they both somehow win on the global stage (Europa league/raine's recent deals)

Robey Warshaw = Brighton. Seriously outperforms with a very small budget.

This is in terms of club size and historical performance throughout the years - not current performance.