Is my Cold Messaging on Linkedin to MD/VP's bad? It's for SA26 should i include it in the message? Please give me your opinions and how i can work towards enhancing it. (success rate it 0%)

Hello First Name,

I really appreciate you connecting! I’ve long admired the environment at ... — one that values collaboration and growth — and your career stands out as one I truly look up to.

I’ll be joining .... next year and am working on building my profile for future opportunities in investment banking. If you’re open to a quick call or even willing to share your corporate email, I’d really appreciate any advice you could offer on early career development.

Best regards,
 

15 Comments
 

The insider:

can yall actually tell me how to improve instead of bashing it?


there really isn’t any way to improve linkedin messaging cause in general it’s just something you don’t do. use apollo ai to find their email and email them instead

 
Most Helpful

Since nobody is giving you more detail here's some line edits:

  • You haven't "long admired" their bank, you probably just learned about it a year ago, and "values collaboration and growth" is HR bullshit that nobody would say in real life
  • Same deal with "your career stands out as one I truly look up to," it's super cringey to say to someone you've never met who also probably has a pretty generic background
  • Don't be so transparent on "building my profile," just say you're exploring IB opportunities and want to learn a bit more about the environment at their bank / the work their group does
  • I personally hate it when someone sends me a connection request => sales pitch immediately. Either pay for a LinkedIn premium messaging product, find their email, or (best imo) find a way to condense your ask into the "send a message with the connection request" feature 

TLDR you should probably scrap the entire thing, there's a million things on this site that will tell you what to do but please don't send this

 

alr thx so much man, alr sent this a few times but it's fine will definitely pay attention to those points in the future. Also, would you recommend reaching out to MD/VPs or analysts/associates?

 

Analyst/associate for sure. way way wayyyy more likely to help and respond. They will know who runs recruiting too

I would also send to their work email. LinkedIn is just a bit lazy tbh, I never respond to linkedin messages but I respond to as many work emails as I can. 

Important: Do not send on a weekend. Schedule them to go out Mon/Tues if you want, but I will rage delete any weekend networking emails

 

Hi First Name,
Thanks for connecting — I’m currently wrapping up my first year of undergrad and will be joining ... London campus next year. I’ve been exploring opportunities in investment banking and came across your profile while looking into [insert group name, like M&A or Leveraged Finance] at Morgan Stanley.

Would be great to hear a bit about your experience if you’re open to it — even a quick chat or a few pointers would mean a lot.

Best,

Is that better?

 

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