Stuff you see on resume
Hi all,
It is been a while since someone posted some stuff on dumb shit people put on their resume.
Just wondering if everyone is interested in posting some for entertainment purpose. I always find those to be very amuzing!.
that's all foks!
Some jerk wrote that he was a moderator on WallStreetOasis for his work experience.
Fuck you dude. Not cool blowing my spot like that.
A could I went to school with never had a real job, so he had to put teaching kids karate and teaching guitar as two of his jobs. I think he is a dance instructor now, no joke.
My brother works in HR.
Some kid wrote RESUME as the title of his resume.
Most kids have 3.3 - 3.4. 3.6 are sometimes tossed.
Kids from Fordham have horrific resumes.
Binghamton is worse. They tossed ~100 resumes without giving out a single interview.
Yeah, but your brother works in HR so jokes on him
Yeah, but your Afro-American so jokes on you.
I see nothing weird about putting karate or guitar instructor on a resume.
Maybe not weird, but when you're trying to to get into IB at BOA, and you're competing with kids who had internships at huge banks, it's just silly.
IT Skills: Comfortable with all social networking sites, online banking
No Joke
Epic
HAHA... that is alwsome... you should interview that guy for an WSO
4 page resumes from MBA grads
^ hahahah.
Any douche that feels like they have more than 1 page worth of shit that I want to read on their resume. Sorry, you're not that fucking interesting!
to date most comedic thing i've seen: had a coworker who spoke 4 languages fluently, and anytime he saw a candidate with one of those languages listed as "proficient", he would conduct a few minutes of the interview in that language. 75% of the time he said candidates could barely speak one proper sentence in said language.
kicker was one time there was a chinese kid interviewing who listed chinese as proficient, my coworker (tall white guy who doesnt know one word in chinese) asked him how he would explain some situation in chinese, and the kid confessed to exaggerating. he could have said anything and nobody would have known better, but he froze and came clean instead. hilarious
Socal,
I did something similar once. A guy had proficient in a language and I asked him an incredibly basic question such as Hi, how is your day going? and the only response I got was "Thank you." I then said in the language "Im going to be conducting this interview in -language-" and he again responded "Thank you."
The kid still got the job but I always heavily discount people who claim proficiency in another language when they only took a few classes in college.
How the F did he still got the job? seriously!!!
I would end the interview there and then... tell the kid to f off, and get out of my office!
If you are going to "exagerate" on your resume, please don't do it with your language.... how easy is it to test that?... think about it? In most global firms, especially out side of US, you can find someone who speak something you need if you look hard enough...
I called out on every language on the candidates' resume in all my interviewes. Had to go frind someone who speaked Russian once from the mail room...ha ha!!!
i remember reading a post on M&I about how a bunch of kids who put fluent in mandarin on their applications to GS got dinged because the interviewer asked them to say 'goldman sachs' in chinese and they didn't know how. As someone who speaks fluent chinese, i honestly wouldn't have any idea how to say GS unless i looked it up beforehand lol.
My personal favorite is seeing something like "Extremely experienced in Microsoft Word" and then having things misaligned, different fonts, etc.
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