Why do all German iBankers look the same?
Something I have noticed after working in the industry and it´s unnerving me really: All the IB (and of the consulting) guys here in Krautland seem to look the same, have exactly the same CV and seem to do all the same. Why is that?
Like:
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99% upper class and the single one German-Turk who fought his way up
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side part; if glasses, half-rimmed
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too tight blue suit, ugly shoes
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exclusively went to Frankfurt School, WHU or Mannheim
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immeasurably closed-minded, has never even thought of interesting work outside IB
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greatest wish in life is to "do deals" or pivot to a PE company
Look, I know that this is a cliché at Wall Street, but there are other guys, too, other styles, creativity, etc. Here, not so much.
Why? Do we really aspire to have our entire industry represented by those blond, blue-suited Davids from WHU or what?
Krautbros, we gotta change that. Time to introduce the mohawk to banking! Free the flanell shirt! Up with Münster, down with Mannheim! Viva la revolución!
Hey Matchwood, the following topics might be helpful:
You're welcome.
Lol I worked in Frankfurt for a bit and I agree with all this....same haircut too
Same reason everyone in Germany has a very distinct look. An event you may recall from the 1940s...
reverse dabs
The 12 year long Hugo Boss fashion show? Yeah sure bro, that one was hella lit.
What did you actually expected? Germans as a people are not a synonym for uniqueness, humor and enjoying in life.
In one sentence - Stiff, humorless, distant, cold-blooded executors of given tasks, But extremely successful in that. They are pre-programmed human beings without any spontaneity. Germans are perfect to work with them and to learn from them, you will work very hard but you will be properly awarded. Every other social interaction with them is very hard, sometimes completely impossible.
In the last 3 months of my life in London I met more interesting people and experienced more beautiful moments in my life than in 3 years of living in Germany.
Like I said, perfect executors. In prosperous times and relevant for investment banking you will get great leaders, true dominant rainmakers who with impress you with their constant desire for perfectionism.
On the other hand, in bad times, they were the creators of some of the worst atrocities in the history of human civilization.
+1 SB for the casual insult lol, but in some ways you´re right, we are a bit stiff. Don´t forget our romantic streak tho, although that doesn´t quite show in IB, I guess...
Maybe FS...
True all the way
Niga more woke than me
I have been reported to be more woke than a black transgender Muslima on a 3-day crack-and-Twitter binge
Only in IB? What about other divisions? S&T, AM...? Where are the other guys in finance in Germany? Do I have to go to London?
I thought -in Frankfurt- for IB the absolute number as well as the quality of graduates applying has decreased and banking is not a popular career option for graduates in Germany.
The smartest people at WHU all want to do consulting
> WHU > smart people
choose
I'd argue that this is even more so the case for Italians
don't forget the french HEC/ ESSEC bros
"German-Turk" nice made up term, you can either be German or Turkish... Nailed stuff about the upper class retards and looks FS only places into MM and Tier 2 shops, WHU and Mannheim are T1 targets
Cringe at the Münster line
You again? Don´t worry, it´s not the remark about Turks that I find laughable, they really aren´t German and never will be. But Münster is a pretty good public university in terms of Finance, although internship opps are of course extremely limited.
If by pretty good you mean semi- to good non-target then yes, some of them made it into T1 and MM IB. The majority will probably get into Big4/ KMU tho...
Ofc Northern Germans are weird in general, no exceptions for the dudes in Münster
Not true, we just don't enjoy the same stupid shit as Anglos
Being from Germany, I believe it is because society there really doesn't even know what I-Banking is. In the US everyone knows wallstreet and thinks you'll be rich if you go there. There is no equivalent in Germany. As a result, those going into it were made aware of it by their parents who are probably working in that space.
This was my personal experience so I am not saying this is necessarily true for Germany as a whole.
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