128 SBs - Senior Resume Review
I'm using a ghost account to help a friend with his resume. Basically, he's a smart kid with a decent resume (I made the formatting changes - so formatting feedback would apply) who wants to break in to a HF from a semi-target. Resume pointers, and general feedback will be rewarded. As will general market advice in the HF industry.
I have 128 SBs and hope to give away 10-25 ... maybe more. Minimum requirement is three "relevant" bullet points or sentences.
He is currently a senior in his Fall semester, thinking about entering the workforce or doing a masters in finance.
Again, I ask for constructive feedback. So if you want to post bs, such as ^^^THIS, I will soil you for weeks to come. Razume was taking a while to upload, bear with me.
Thank You, M.R.
I'm not positive, but generally I think people who are still undergrads put their work experience below their education. It's possible people see his resume and immediately assume he is a fresh grad or a few years about and dismiss his resume before really even looking at it because his EDU is so far down. His majors are impressive, maybe it would be helpful to put a Major GPA if it is worth putting down. Also, I think generally if you can get rid of white space as much as possible, you will be in great shape. Try to combine bullet points, or perhaps more importanly, expand upon the points already there. Don't lie by any means, but make sure you're making what "your friend" did sound as impressive as possible while still staying within the range of backing it up in an interview. Would also use the M&I format, because it just is generally better when applying to finance jobs.
for leadership stuff, need more quantification. you only talk about what you did, and not measurable accomplishments
New York, NY (you forgot the comma)
breakdown sat scores, or at least show the math portion, assuming it's pretty good
-"Sumer Analyst" should be spelt "Summer Analyst" -The abbreviation, ITS, in "Certified ITS technician" should be spelt out -"Technical Skills" has an unnecessarily capitalized "S." It should just be "Technical skills" -In the line "Observed server maintenance in relation to crashing issues, space overloading, reconstructing hardware" there should be the word "and" in front of "reconstructing hardware -All the lines in the first first professional experience sound gramatically awkward. For example, the line, "Managed computer issue affecting affecting colleague for a week, ultimately resolving the matter" looks overly complicated. Moreover, these achievement points should all use past tense "-ed" words as opposed to ongoing "-ing" words. The sentence should read something "Managed and resolved computer issue affecting colleage." This drops the "resolving" from the latter half and also makes the sentence more efficient. -The above issue repeats in other sentences too, such as "Developed detailed software testing, boosting office efficiency." The sentence should ideally have the "developed" and "boosting" words be parallel in nature. I suggest writing: "Developed detailed software testing that raised office efficiency." Thus, "developed" and "raised" are now consistent. -Another example: "Formulated internal technical procedure, communicating findings to partners and employees." The word "communicating" again sounds out of place. It should be "Formulated internal technical procedure and communicated findings to the firm's partners" -General resume convention requires the job ending most recently to be on top (based on chronological order). Technically the Technology Representative job should go above the Summer Analyst job so I would perhaps change the Technology Representative job's end date to August, 2011 -Under the Technology Representative line of "Troubleshooting spanned from......," you need to change the "Troubleshooting" tense from -ing to -ed. You used all past tense words for all your other bullet points for this job so "Troubleshooting" should also be consistent -For the education date, you should just put "Anticipated in May 2012"
For the professional experience he needs to quantify the results of his work. For example, he stated, "developed detailed software testing, boosting office efficiency." Show that it boosted efficiency, don't tell.
I would say that he needs to use the merger and inquisitions template.
If his major GPA is higher than the overall GPA than I would list that as well, especially if it is higher than 3.5.
Also, if he has a near perfect score on the math portion of his SAT than I would put that.
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