No expierence, unsure what to do even with my life

Hi guys,

I am a 22 year old guy from Germany. I am almost done with my bachelor degree when I will be 23 years old. My GPA is 3.3/4.0, I dont have any relevant work expierence. I had a small company for 2 years when I was 20-21 and tried to save every penny of it. I have no 140.000 in the bank and have to repay student loans.

I have been a very lazy student, all my life, even though I had the intelligence to do really well in school. However my discipline is zero, mostly because I am very insecure and dont expect to make my goals anyway. I have never achieved a goal.

Lately I have been looking into investment banking or trading. I am not sure why. I like to be in a powerful plays, or at least a reputable place and not a random office somewhere in the country earning the same wage forever.

So far obviously all my applications have been denied. I do however have been accepted to several in house days of option trading companies and also for a top 5 or top 7 consultancy firm. Which could obviously lead to some potential.

Even though I am already 22 years old I still do not know what to do with my life and this has been going on for 2 years now and yes it is leading to a failed life to be honest.

I am not sure what to do. Currently I am obsessed with landing an internship at big bank or consultancy firm. Then the next day I realize that the only reason I am probably doing it is for the financial opportunity. Sometimes I am even thinking of changing to a new bachelor, physics or medicine in particular.

So to summarize, I preformed bad, I dont know what to do in my life, currently obsessed with landing an internship despite having small odds of landing one, basically sitting on my computer 24/7 browswing linked in pages of employees + this forum + writing my resume instead of spending time to get a good grade at the courses I am currently following.

I dont know what to do and wether or not I am living in some sort of illusion

I wasted my life, potential so far and now I am trapped and dont know how to get out.