I feel somewhat lifeless, I wouldn’t call it depression as I’m not sad or anything, just get so drained/tired that I never want to do anything. Im older for my class cuz I’m a lateral so I just feel exhausted after 2 years of big four accounting and 2 years of IB
I think my gf is starting to get frustrated. I’m top bucket but it’s almost like at what cost, bc I sort of feel like a shell of myself. Not sure what to do
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Not yet, I’m also a lateral from big4 and still going. This job takes boundaries and priorities - as a top performer you should be able to set boundaries with your teams for those times you need to do personal stuff. On priorities, realize that you’ve chosen a job that takes up a lot of your time so you need to prioritize your free time between hobbies/gf/friends/family appropriately.
You don’t need to be sad to be depressed; look up the symptoms. I obviously can’t diagnose you, but this may very well be a case of depression. Or not. That’s for a professional to figure out
Get help, plain and simple. If you’re sick, you go to a medical doctor. Why not go to a psychiatrist for mental issues? You literally have nothing to lose.
I’d also consider therapy, regardless of your psychiatric diagnosis.
Finally, make sure all your “fundamentals” are okay. Do you sleep enough? Do you work out (important not just physically but also mentally)? Do you eat proper nutrition (may want to check for deficiencies, as that could also cause low energy / no drive)?
The sooner you work on it, the better. Don’t wait until shit happens. Maybe take some vacation. This is a tough job; it’s easy to feel burnt out.
Great post - could not agree more
I wouldn’t immediately jump to depression, after spending all your time in finance, you turn into a boring person.
If you spent all your time hosting parties in Miami, you would be incredibly fun, but probably retarded.
You are what you do.
I was in the exact same situation and felt like I gave up. GF was getting frustrated and and I always worked every day to keep being a top performer. Eventually I realized I just needed to able to say NO! Sometimes when there’s too much stuff going on it’s ok to pass on additional work because you need some time outside of work. I found that when you’re already a top performer you won’t be looked down on when passing on work because you are cranking on other important deliverables. I’d suggest just say no and keep doing good work and your life will improve. This is especially true if you feel like your output is way above other analysts. They can do some shitty work too, it doesn’t always have to be you
Great post by danpo. Rather than depression it feels like burn out.
Not being overstaffed is key. Not just for analysts. I struggled even at VP level trying to juggle staffing. When I was busy with execution and started saying no to any BD or pitch work, my life and work output improved drastically.
Therapy is quite accessible these days - and on a banker's salary it's defo worth it. Go for it - we support you!
Whatever you do, do not fry your brain with SSRIs. The fact is that jobs like these are not great for your mind. We were created to work physical jobs and be in the company of family and friends, not pull 80+ hour weeks sitting under fluorescent lighting staring into computer screens eating doordash slop for 90% of our meals. Of course you’re going to sometimes feel down working this job. If you eat healthy, make time for exercise, and maintain connections with family and friends, you can make do though. Focus on those before thinking that there’s something “ medically wrong” with you for feeling this way.
Misery loves company, and people who have already chemically lobotomized themselves will screech at this advice and encourage you to run to the nearest psychiatrist and get on pills instead.
I was already clinically insane from the start
Firstly - I'm in HF, not IB though I think the 'symptoms' are comparable.
I tend to have large up and down spells. Some days I'm super motivated and fire up out of bed. Other days I'm just not motivated.
As you foreshadowed, I also had relationship problems that arose largely as a by-product of the stress / working hours that my personality succumbed to.
Some people on this thread are right - make sure you are:
a) Looking after your physical health - exercise at least 30 minutes every single day! (I tend to find I am happier if I exercise in the evenings and it allows me to sleep easier).
a2) Sleep at least 6 hours. (This is self-explanatory).
a3) Have the correct diet/food intake. Eating shitty foods makes you feel......shitty! Don't be too reliant on caffeine or other substitutes. (I have 1-3 coffees a day, but do not allow myself to indulge beyond that!)
a4) Get some sunlight! - This is something that I've made effort to do recently and I've noticed some short term positive results. Sunlight has been linked to several positive outcomes for mental/physical health. (Link here to a reference).
a5) Take breaks. This one is somewhat harder because it can be dependent on working commitments and employer flexibility. Having a few weekends/weeks off every year is crucial for the mind.
Remember, this game is a marathon and not a sprint. Do not let them break your soul. You'll have a career that will likely last > 30 years and you need to make adjustments to accommodate to a long ride.
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