Goldman Sachs or Kate Upton?
If you could only accept one of the following two offers, which one would it be?
-Goldman Sachs offers you the job as its next CEO.
-Kate Upton offers to start cheating on Justin Verlander with you, but there are two conditions to the cheating: (1) You would only get to have sex with Kate on the days that Justin is credited with a loss (so the sex would probably not be plentiful), and (2) whilst having sex with Kate, you would be required to wear Justin’s baseball cap and cleats (but not his cup, which – of course – would make relations unduly arduous).
This bitch would crumble under two plates
Wow... I have no idea what that possible sex-jargon is.
you wouldn't would you weakboi
Who cares? You want a Strong Woman (TM)?
I do want a strong woman. A woman with some sort of defining features. Strong legs. Hips. Curves. Some substance to her. High cheekbones. Good skin. Not a Starbucks Becky who works in HR, does 30 minutes of elliptical three times a week, and owns a shirt about brunch
I want to work at the goldman sachs
I suppose if you get the Goldman gig, you could probably eventually get Kate, too. Call it a two-fer.
I don't care
Kate Upton is pretty basic bro. Her body is built like a plank with (admittedly nice) tits attached. Also, no woman on this planet could make me turn down a job as a CEO of a major company, not to even speak of GS.
I like your tunnel-vision and commitment to success. I think if you put your comment on your resume, it would serve you well.
Totally agree. Almost all these super famous chicks guys drool over are fucking 7s. I run into hotter chicks at the gym and in stores and shit
Just goes to show, there’s no meritocracy in the Sex Symbol biz
Yeah with 8+ billion people, everything comes down to marketing
Same. In my city too. ;) Couldn't have said it better.
This is a dumb hypothetical. It wouldn't even be a good one with no stipulations.
I’m short, so I actually like the “must wear cleats” stipulation.
Golden sachs is a pretty baller place to be CEO. Don't you think that Kate Upton would want you anyway?
True... but vs. Justin Verlander, probably Cy Young winner this year and definite HOF'er? Pardon the cross-over analogy, but I don't think it's a slam dunk.
https://bleacherreport.com/articles/2771121-mlb-must-consider-shortened…
Shortened season? I'll go with Goldman.
Oh, crap -- fewer chances for JV losses!
zactly
if you're the goldman CEO, you'll be able to pull girls 100x hotter than kate upton. this shouldnt even be a topic
Okay, hard to argue with that one...
This is true. Look at Lloyd’s wife.... oh shit
Must have side pieces.
You don't even have to put CEO on the table. I'd take an analyst/associate gig at GS over Upton any day. No-brainer.
Millions of dollars, set for life or Kate's sidepiece? No brainer. Show me the money.
This is easy. GS CEO, buy the Astros, send Verlander to the minors and don't touch Kate because there are much bigger fish to fry.
BOOM. ROASTED.
Ha. Nice scenario..,
Wait so your comparison involves what would be considered the pinnacle of success in the both the financial world and by others, or cucking Justin Verlander to be Kate's piece while looking like Justin Verlander? How did you think of this haha did this happen to you? Did someone sleep with your girl while wearing your clothes?
I’d take GS CEO any day... who would trade money and success for women? I’m only a high school student, but there are even hotter girls at my school. Anyone who doesn’t take the CEO offer is retarded
GS. Even an analyst would attract Upton over Verlander
GS. Kate has not ass or rack.
Kate Upton got fat years ago, she's already past her prime.
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