Moving to NYC - homesickness
Hello everyone,
In july I will be moving to NYC to start for a bulge bracket bank. For my entire life I have lived with my family and have a very good relationship with all of them. I stayed at home all 4 years of college and never regretted it.
Next month I will be moving to NYC all alone and I'm beginning to get very worried/upset about it. I know it may sound lame to some of you but it's something that has been playing on my mind. The hardest part is that I turned down a great job (MM IB) in my hometown to move to NYC and I'm beginning to seriously regret it.
Did anyone else experience homesickness when moving to NY? Any reassuring words?
Sorry if this makes no sense but I needed to at least write this down.
If you're from a small town I think it would be a shock but if you're from a medium/big city you'll probably adjust pretty quickly. NYC is big and you may be pretty lonely at first but you can't stay at home forever.
If you are going to a BB, the analyst class should be large enough that you can find a few people you like and get along with. That plus working will probably keep your mind off things
So spread your wings and fly, lesbian seagull.
The voice of reason in a crazy, crazy world.
You're going to be working so much that it wouldn't matter where you lived, you would hardly see your family.
^^ I like the above post.
I am the opposite of you, being not very family-oriented at all. That said, you have to leave the nest at some point and the long hours you'll spend at the office will make it easier. If you were living at home, the temptation to participate in family activities would probably dilute your concentration and dedication to the job. Don't schedule any family vacations or tell them to come visit you in NYC because that never ends well, especially during your first year.
When you feel like you miss your family, harness it as motivation to do your best and make them proud.
How far away does your family live?
Everyone will go through a bout of homesickness - the food, comfort, ease of living in a familiar town and seeing familiar faces. I don't think there are many who have never ventured away from home. All I can say is to make new friends and familiarize yourself with parts of the city you are interested in.
Make sure that you find something to do outside of work and going home to sleep. Even if you are tired, go to social events, bars, museums, galleries, whatever floats your boat...I always felt that it was better to skip a little extra rest and have a social life outside of work to help keep sanity.
One of the best ways to avoid homesickness is to get a good roommate, someone you get along with. Having a roommate will at least mean you have a connection with someone outside of the office.
The most miserable analysts are the ones that have no social life outside of work.
I agree with this - for me it's getting into the gym 4 days a week and trying to get out for drinks / a good dinner at least once a week with my fellow analysts that keeps me sane.
Put a poster of something from your home up in your room. Ideally, it should be some land or property that costs a lot of money and you would like to go back to. That reminds you why you are out here in this hell-hole of a city.
The analyst training program is one of your last chances to make genuine friends. Take full advantage of it- grab lunch with the guys you enjoy hanging out with, not necessarily the smart ones or the ones who are in the best groups. You will be friends with these folks for years and years and years- for better or for worse, so choose them wisely.
Quit being a little bitch, man the fuck up. Read American Psycho and learn to not give a shit about anyone or anything.
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