Moving to the city of your S/O - How much would you give up?

How much comp would you give up to move to the city of your significant other? I'm currently a one hour flight (7 hour drive) away from her but thinking of switching to something closer to her, we've been dating for a year now, and I definitely see a future there. Comp will most likely always be less where she is located, and I'd move there eventually. 

 
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Big mistake. Never sacrifice for a woman unless you are married.

 

One party has to give in. I wouldn't sacrifice for any man. 

 

Both of our families live there / are from there, so that would just make more sense long term

 

LA / SF; Trying to keep it open-ended so didn't want to comment on comp specifics

 

Oh I thought you meant like some rando city, not LA/SF. I'd consider more than just the cost of living and comp. For example, all of my friends from college will be in New York, so I can't seem myself leaving for almost anything else since I'd know absolutely 0 people. Even with a gf, idk if I would want to leave behind all  of my friends. It would be a touch decision, and I can't say how I actually would act since I've not faced that. If you guys are serious, then maybe it's worth it for you. Otherwise, I'd say it's not.

 

COL doesn't vary across the two, so not really a concern

 

I'd advise you not to look at the comp number necessarily but more at career opportunities, medium to long term advancement and how it will present on your resume. 

Eg If you move for 20k less that's not really a big deal. But if you move for 20k less and you also won't have upward mobility then you're fucked and will regret it in a couple of years.

Also your partner may be thankful, and say they appreciate what you've done etc but the reality is unless they work in the same industry they will not really understand and appreciate the sacrifice.

I am speaking from personal experience. Do not be in a rush, be patient for the right role - not for the initial comp, but for the career path. Your future self will thank you and you will feel much more at ease and comfortable in the context of the relationship as well. 

 

Both of our families are from there. That is where I'd want to move to eventually - just a matter of time. 

 

fortunately for you SF to LA or vice versa the quality of job mobility wont be that hindered. Plenty of high quality gigs in both cities. Not a bad move.

 

If you're able to continue your career or build it there notwithstanding the compensation, then why not? I don't adhere to the idea that you gotta stick with X city to be successful. If you're smart and work hard you'll make it wherever you are.

 

Don't die for nyash bro.

But seriously this entirely depends on the context of the situation and your own goals. Some people are more family oriented and would sacrifice career goals for their family. Some people are insanely career oriented and would sacrifice family for their career. Depends which one you are. You also didn't provide context. For example moving from NYC to the SF office isn't that deep but moving from NYC to Colombus Ohio is probably gonna have a big effect on your career trajectory.

 

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