Sexually active IB analyst in NY
Do analysts in IB have any time to hook up with girls? I know having a serious relationship is tough with the time commitment but do you even have time to go on Tinder/Hinge dates or meet girls at bars/clubs? Or is it common to hook up with other analysts in your class lol? Any and all insights/advice are greatly appreciated.. just hoping I dont have to be celibate for two years
Premarital sex is a serious offense. Better at least run it by compliance first
You also have to run everything by your MD, they have first rights via prima nocta.
Part of the Series exam (not the SIE) registration requires a finger print which is then laser etched onto a company specific chastity ring. Some banks use the ring as login token, others tend to be more lax and just require you to keep it in your desk. Either way, this is something the Feds monitor. So, senior staff tends to be pretty serious about the whole thing. I've seen a few top bucket analysts get bonuses slashed for leaving it at home and some midbuckets get carried by their chastity belts. This has always been incongruous with wallstreet's mild alcoholism but tends to limit casual analyst hookups.
Hinge and Tinder are good options, but a lot like trading apps you'll need to run it by HR/compliance. If you end up hitting it off, make sure you take the conversation over to your personal line because the Fed also monitors dating apps for chastity ring compliance protocol. Again, this could hit your bonus. My advice is to play it straight and invest in a good lotion and a few choice subscriptions.
I'm not kidding here. You can hire virtual assistants for $10-$15/hour to go on tinder for you and swipe. You can also give them preset lines. One of those lines should be for them to message you on IG or on your phone. If your profile is good enough, you'll get them to hit you up. If you barely get matches, this might not work, but if you have a really solid profile and not the time, this is very worthwhile.
Most of the guys in my analyst class were down to jerk each other off every now and then.
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I’m convinced at least 90% of the users here are virgins at this point.
From the sounds of this post you've been celibate for a while mate, what's two more years
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