Difficult Choices and bad situation - Plz help (Time sensitive) !
Hey All - I was recently pushed out and asked to leave by my old firm but luckily have offers for various places - unsure whether to come clean
Hey All - I was recently pushed out and asked to leave by my old firm but luckily have offers for various places - unsure whether to come clean
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I am still employed on paper so if they do an official check it will be fine (which is what I thought they would do). Problem is they want to speak to personal references where asking bad questions will lead to the truth coming out. Refs want to help, but understandably can't risk their own reputation
If the issue is the circumstances around your leaving but you have references that want to see you do well, can you speak directly with them to "prep" the conversation?
I was in a bit of a similar situation where I was making a move that burned some bridges. I just told the background check company and new employer I didn't want to use my current company for references to jeopardize my employment (which is a common reason), and leveraged some older references, but not sure if you have that luxury.
FWIW, the actual background check will likely just verify dates of employment with HR (unless there was legal consequences / court documentation for whatever you did). References will more likely be carried out directly by the teams you're interviewing with.
OP here, unfortunately I don't have the luxury of old references so that is why I'm thinking that the best option might just be to come clean - but not sure on the best way to do this unfortunately
Why were you pushed out? Feel like depending on the circumstances, the situation can easily be explained if you’re upfront now.
Unfortunately not great, nothing serious or really bad but performance was mentioned
If you have even a decent relationship with potential references, at least have a conversation with them before shooting yourself in the foot and telling a prospective employer that you were pushed out. Assuming they aren't absolute snakes, they should be upfront with you about whether or not they will be a good reference. No one says yes to being a reference and then turns around and shit talks them unless they're actively trying to torpedo you.
Background checks do not usually ask for references. Background checks are done by a 3rd party and they just look at criminal record / FINRA fines etc. Any references would be done by the actual firm, so unless they specifically asked for people to call for references I think you're fine.
Just give them HR's number instead of your manager for the background check. Say it's policy. HR will literally not give anything out other than the dates you worked there. and the background check will only ask for that.
References are very rare for background check, they usually come before the offer. Have they specifically asked to speak to your references, or do they just want a background check? Just say you do not want to use your current company for references since they don't know you're interviewing. I wouldn't come clean here, you've done nothing wrong.
Yes unfortunately they want to speak to personal references which is the dilemma here, and I don't really have any others to use apart from my most recent employer
You dont have a former coach, teacher or something like that to use as a reference?
Without all the facts, if you position it right you should be okay. I think you speak with your prior firm and apprise them of the situation - that you received an offer and would would appreciate their support on a reference check. Go to the person for whom you have the best relationship. Unless they are malicious, they will likely give you a neutral-to-good reference, which should check the box. Firms have a vested interest in their "alumni" - not only for reputation but also for future deal flow. Depending on the response you get from that conversation, you could consider preempting the conversation a bit with your future employer by couching it that that you and your prior employer mutually decided that it wasn't a great fit, which is one of your reasons for leaving. Also I would say do it QUICKLY and then if (2) and (3) fall apart you still have time to accept (1). Blame the holidays for any delays.
At the end of the day a core skillset of PE is being able to narrate a story given a certain set of circumstances that leads to your desired outcome (i.e. close a deal, whatever). This is certainly that. Good luck.
Thank you so much - this is really helpful
1.) You’re still employed there so you’re not lying.
2.) when they run a background check, legally the company can only confirm the dates you worked there and your title. They would actually get in huge trouble if they said anything about your performance there without your permission. Not sure if they can disclose if you were terminated or not, but you weren’t terminated, so you have nothing to worry about. You can be assured no one from HR will bad mouth you if you are still employed.
3.) Now is anything stopping a partner at your new firm from calling a partner at your old firm that he/she knows to get a download. No. Is that that technically legal, no for the reasons I said above, but not much you can do about it. When we try and hire c-suite executives I’ll call people at other PE firms who currently hire them to get their views. Some are very forthcoming and others are very buttoned up bc it’s “not the most above board” practice unless they’ve given you permission to contact them as a reference.
4.) my recommendation, don’t worry about it and find someone at your current firm who you trust to list as a reference should they ask for references. But don’t worry HR bad mouthing you, they can’t. And likelihood is low that someone will do a reference check with someone you didn’t list as a reference although it’s not impossible.
OP Here, Thanks so much!
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