Intern starting in a month, scared out of my mind
So I come from an extreme non-target, as in when someone at my school gets an internship/job working in IB it is a huge deal and they are regarded as the top of the class. I managed to work my tail off networking to get an internship at a UMM but fast growing PE firm. I am ecstatic to get the internship, I have done a ton of research on this firm and it is truly my dream job (on paper, I haven't worked there yet of course), and they have a high % return rate from previous interns. But I am terrified to start working. There is a small intern class, all the other interns are from targets that I could have never gotten into, and I am afraid that I will not be able to keep up. I have reached out to several connections I have made at the firm on advice to prepare (from a suggestion from a senior level member who is an alum of my school), and I am doing everything I have been told to prepare. But I am still worried. I have never worked in a fast paced environment with hours like PE. I don't have any plan B places to apply to if I do not get the return offer. I am a hard worker, but I don't know if I can keep up with the learning curve. I worry that I will freeze up in the spotlight and ruin all of the hard work it took to get here.
Congratulations on the offer!
You might do great, you might suck. You might love and want to breathe this job every day, or you might hate it. That's not really the point. The point is you will learn a ton. The point is that the skills you gain and this experience listed on your CV will open new doors. If you get an offer, great. If you do not, you are in a drastically stronger position to get another internship and turn that into a full-time offer, or even just recruit for full-time roles directly.
Also, get this idea that people who went to schools you could "never get into" are somehow going to be better than you. Assuming you are in the US with its own weird breed of "holistic" admissions, you do not even know if you were really not good enough, or if the other interns were even ever better applicants than you. If they made you the offer, they considered your school good enough.
Enjoy your internship and welcome to the club!
Be confident - the fact you got an internship with others from targets shows they see something special in you. Just be curious. Show that you want to learn, show that you can take initiative and find things to help the team with.
Given you managed to secure this internship, I'm sure that is natural for you. Best of luck.
Every single person has felt exactly what you’re feeling now - imposter syndrome. You’re exactly where you need to be.
Take notes. Write down every instruction given to you.
OP, just curious - did you have a prior IB/PE internship? AUM range of the firm?
One piece of advice that might be helpful as I was in a similar situation before - don't feel like you need to overcompensate / go above and beyond to prove your worth relative to the 'target' kids. If the firm didn't think you belonged there you wouldn't have gotten the internship.
I didn't feel like I belonged at my firm when I first started, and the anxiety from it drove me to make a lot of borderline autistic social decisions that were completely uncharacteristic of me. Thankfully some people overlooked it and I was able to land the return offer. But it was a good lesson for me to remember that your mindset frames your behavior - and in this case, I think you'd benefit from re-thinking where you currently stand in the world.
You said it yourself - you just landed one of the best jobs in the history of your undergrad through hardwork, perserverance and determination. Hold those traits close to you for the summer gig and beyond - most target kids don't have that kind of tenacity and seniors notice that stuff more than they notice who makes the best models etc.
First off, congrats on the offer.
Worst case scenario: You work your ass off for 3 months, make a good amount of money, live in a cool city, and have leverage 99% of other undergrads don't have.
As an intern, you're expected to make mistakes so it's not a total deal breaker at least to some extent. In my personal opinion, you can only "prep" to a certain degree. Once you get adjusted and into the mire of workflow you'll learn a ton more than any prep guide or book. Keep an open mind and be cordial with your co-workers...it goes a long way and is often the catalyst for getting a return offer. Hope this helps.
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