Worst secondaries funds
Alright, let's get a list going of the bottom of the barrel junk shops.
My recco is Goanna Capital, Headlands, and Capital Dynamics.
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How do you not have Dawson Partners on there?
Fair
Ardian (mostly only do LP-led deals), Landmark (Ares) - returns aren't stellar, ICG (good players at one point).
How can you possible say Ardian is bottom of the barrel when they're currently raising a $20Bn fund
They’ve got massive higher-up problems, use a lot of leverage for their transactions, poor DD too.
Ardian's returns are consistent - consistently mediocre for the level of risk they employ. They speak about diversification, but they're paying 95+ for LBO assets already levered 6x and then using 50% acquisition financing plus a capital call line. Their unlevered returns are probably 8-10% and then they lever it up at the transaction level to 14% and add some fund-level structuring to try and hit 15%...then deduct your mgmt fees and OPEX and you are at a low/mid teens insanely levered beta product.
What’s the scoop on Goanna? Weren’t they on the Coreweave and Figma deals?
Just not institutional in approach. I keep getting email spam from them directly to commit to their fund.
that will get ya on the SEC's radar...
It's a PE FoF with two really young employees, they hired one guy with experience to run the secondaries strategy and he quit after less than a year. I don't know what anyone would see in them.
looks like crazy turnover there lol
HarbourVest pays bottom barrel. Promotion also impossible because it is top heavy.
Ya but their returns are good
Ahhh here we go… the annual thread of people shit talking in secondaries
The most ironic part is it's people working at buyout shops shit talking these firms that buy their funds/assets in the secondary market.
Based on WSO, every single secondaries fund that ppl have heard of is utter dogshit, unless it's a small MM player that maybe hires 1 investment professional every 2 years with some specific niche focus. These are not helpful lmfao
Commonfund
Kline Hill has the rudest people in the industry. They also bribe brokers.
Lol looks like Sixth Street and Bridgepoint may be acquiring them...
At only a valuation of 500mm seems light to be honest..
What do you mean bribe? They pay them a finders fee? Wouldn’t call that bribing, but I’m guessing there’s more
They literally bribe brokers. I know since I was on the sell side. Would be a sell side process where the seller pays a fee and Kline will call up the banker and tell them they'll also pay them a fee if they away the process in their direction and limit bids from other buyers. They have a reputation in the industry of being slimey and overly competitive.
Dawson Partners and Headlands are in a LOT of trouble.
Tell us more
if you have an offer from cpp for rotational analyst vs. dawson for ft, which would you choose?
CPP
What’s wrong with headlands?
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