Resume Critique - Will be attending a career fair

I assume that is a link to your resume but it gave me an error when I clicked it

Perhaps post it on razume.com to get someone to critique your resume as well. Also, "looking for a summer internship...nothing super competitive" This is very vague. A little more guidance is necessary if you truly want help.
Finally, don't forget your school has a career services center. Their job is to help you.

To follow this up, other than razume.com , is there another place where people critique your resume for free? Obviously career services in school, but more......finance oriented. Anyone know?

dosk does a very good job, but it'll cost.

If you are proficient in reading, writing, speaking polish, shouldn't you just say proficient?

I'd ditch the externship, it looks like you trailed some dude on a desk for a few hours. Not worth mentioning. Mentioning one semester's gpa seems contrived, what did you do, pack all your easy courses in then? Maybe a major gpa if it is higher. Your financial accounts analyst position sounds to me like data entry, try to glorify it a little (think less words). Accounting clerk can do with fewer bullets as well. Don't give 60 hours after your community service award, make them think it was actually a significant amount of time. Knowing ms office is not a "special skill," either get ms certified or ditch it. Your piece about references and letters of recommendations should just say references and should be centered and down a line

I agree, lose the community college and significant coursework is way too burdensome. Micro/macro at community college? Dude, everyone knows how to draw ppf, it's not significant or interesting. I'd say you can leave most of the coursework from Maryland except for intermediate micro/macro. And change "experience" to "work experience."

I took most of the advice into consideration, I deleted the CC, moved the externship to "other experience", modified special skills to skills and quantified some of my bullet points. I also took it to the UMD career services center and didnt get any extraordinary help. Well here it is as it stands:

http://razume.com/documents/6633

I decided to keep my previous semesters GPA, I think it is a strong point.

Any other criticism is more than welcomed.

Thanks

NewYorkBora

I am also deleting the 60 hours which is after the community service award. I just noticed that one now.

New york bora where are you applying? and why types of roles are looking at?

Im looking into consulting, PWM, IBN, Portfolio Analytics, etc. Internships for the summer.

A few more suggestions:

1) Under "Financial Accounts Analyst," the fourth bullet would be more meaningful if we knew what you reduced the outstanding balance from. If you don't think it's that impressive, maybe denote it in percentage terms instead of nominal 2) Under the same category, bullet 5 sounds like you were working with council. Instead of saying you "Released illegal insurance agency activities to department regional council," make it sound like you added value in determining they were illegal, noticed the unusual activity, and were involved in any litigation that resulted 3) "Accounting Clerk," final bullet, focus on this more. Negotiating could show intelligence, initiative, maybe mention some calculations you ran to determine where the counter party would sell. I'd focus on this rather than "dealing with customers on a personal level." 4) Externship is good under other experience, I'd try rewriting it so you can fit the second bullet point on one line (also, maybe should've blacked out the dude's name as well). Also, I'd delete the date and location. As it is no longer work experience, you can leave open the question of how long you were there. 5) Your ECs look like you like cars/motorcycles; maybe group these in such a way that it would jump out at someone reading it who likes cars and they'd think, cool, I'd like to have in the office with me we could talk cars/bikes 6) Not sure you need to list all three forms of Polish. Could just say you're proficient 7) If you're going to keep ms office, maybe put it on the same line as the SAS/STATA stuff

• Reduced a 365 day outstanding balance report by 80% and maintained it under $50,000

or

• Reduced and maintained the 365 day outstanding balance report from $250,000 to under $50,000

which one sounds better?

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