How do I simulate IB work/hours/pain before even getting an internship?

I want to see if I really am cut for this. I'm 19 years old.

Time is money. I don't want to devote 2-4 years to a degree if I can't do the job. That's a waste. If I can't handle it, I won't pursue IB then. I'm only going to do IB for 3 years max then exit.

I'm already 3 years into my business/finance Associates degree. I plan on getting a Bachelors in finance.


I may have some serious potential: vvv

I read the 48 Laws of Power.

I'm super agreeable and will take orders without question.

I can buttress and flatter people and stroke their egos. That could prove to be useful to landing the initial job.

I do nofap (complete semen retention) for 1 year now, so that builds my willpower. I plan on telling that fact to my employer so I can stand out (don't steal my idea).

I don't like my family since they caused a lot of abuse, so not seeing them won't be an issue.

I'm schizoid, but not useless. I don't plan on making friends, so social life is not an issue.

I'm 6' 3".


Things to consider though: vvv

I'm in Sacramento , but I may have to move to New York City, which has crappy weather. But Sacramento is fucking hot, so I don't want to stay here permanently. So the weather may be a deal breaker.

Big one - I've never held a job in my life, so I don't have much experience in actual. But I do plan to work at Amazon warehouse within a few months, and then leverage that experience at a finance/business internship.

If not IB, then it is computer science for me. But that's another issue because if I do CS, then I'll have to live in San Fransisco for the career, which is too close to my family in Sacramento. They're poor people, so they may come after me. I need at least 1000 miles of distance between. So I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place with CS/Finance.

Sorry, I probably wrote a lot of useless information but it may be relevant.

What do you think? I really want to simulate the IB experience? Thank you!

Comments (47)

Jan 20, 2021 - 10:56pm

I disagree. I think it's honorable and I aspire to be like that. I started fapping at 8 years old and I'm at the point in my life where I have a serious addiction. I'm talking 5-10x a day. I need to quit before I start FT in the summer.  

  • Intern in IB - Gen
Jan 20, 2021 - 11:47pm

Sometimes I think about taking my life so I beat my meat over 25 times a day to try to have a heart attack. Maybe that symbolizes IB in a way.

  • Intern in IB-M&A
Jan 19, 2021 - 6:43pm

This has to be a troll

"I can buttress and flatter people and stroke their egos."

"I do nofap (complete semen retention) for 1 year now, so that builds my willpower. I plan on telling that fact to my employer so I can stand out (don't steal my idea)."

Jan 19, 2021 - 6:51pm

No. It's how I stand out from the crowd. It's the one thing I do different than 99% of other guys (I'm a numbers person).


If everyone told their employer they practice semen retention, then it's nothing special anymore. But knowing how the internet works, it's 90% too late.

Jan 19, 2021 - 7:47pm

There's definitely different ways to go about it, but I personally downloaded an application that generates alarm sounds at random times of the day - I set the frequency to 16 times per day. At each alarm, I would immediately take a 15 minute ice bath.

I rinsed and repeated this exercise for a few months or so.

  • Incoming Analyst in IB - Gen
Jan 19, 2021 - 8:24pm

If you're not a troll, get yourself on a varsity sport, 3.7+, work 8-12 hours, and a leadership position in a club (investment club/SAAC) and call it good enough. Preferably doing this during a hard semester while on a competitive team that has coaches that push the limits. Otherwise, maybe try working full time and going to the gym 5 days a week on top of your school work. Won't be the same as ib but you need to find 80 hours of commitments a week and not skip any of them.

  • Intern in IB - Gen
Jan 20, 2021 - 8:23pm

I do this yet I soon found out without the pleasure of socialising with others in sport and actually playing sport, I soon struggled under the hours. In short for OP, you can't replicate it in my opinion, especially if you have to work remotely.

Jan 20, 2021 - 11:51pm

This is what REALLY happens to man 1 year into nofap

To live is to suffer, to survive is to find some meaning in the suffering.

  • 3
  • Intern in IB - Ind
Jan 22, 2021 - 6:00am

I would say the best simulation of the experience is to have a machine that hard slaps you in the balls with a 25% chance any time you get an email. Make sure you receive at least 50 emails a day

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Jan 24, 2021 - 12:15pm

Such a troll post. But for people who actually want to know, if you actually have a semi-mathematical intensive degree (STEM/Econ/etc) and have 3.75+, leadership position, competition awards, and multiple internships, it shows you are pretty much ready for banking. Honestly for me my worst week in school was worse than banking worst week, because you actually have to learn and master the concepts like complex statistics (fking econometrics man) rather than creating a ppt that is 10 pages and each page takes you 30 minutes because of fked up formatting.

Jan 25, 2021 - 11:45am

Enlist in the Army under a RASP contract then pick 3rd Battalion. 🥴

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