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Wall Street Oasis » Blogs » SanityCheck's blog
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Funniest Stories - The Analyst Years
 

SanityCheck's picture
SanityCheck
      PE
 
 
(Gorilla, 633
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 11:30pm
poo

Although working as an investment banking analyst was a living hell at the time, I now look back at my years with nostalgia. Luckily, as time passes, the 100 hour weeks just blend together and the pain has gone away. Of course, I'm still irrationally uncomfortable and nervous whenever I see a red blinking light (Blackberry email) but other than that, all I remember now are the fun times. The 5am nights when you finally get the pitch books binded and shipped to the MD's house and as you're waiting for the driver to call you and confirm that he delivered it, you're joking around with your associate/VP and realize that they're actually human beings too.

However, the best parts were the office gossip and hilarious stories that were shared among the analyst class. The best stories always came from the summer interns, which made sense because 20-21 year olds know absolutely nothing about anything (including common sense).

One of my favorite stories was a summer intern who had a bad case of diarrhea. Unfortunately for him, my BB was proud of their latest technology upgrade for the entire bullpen, the wireless headset (which of course is about 10 years behind the technology of any normal corporation).

Armed with this technology, he was able to piss off an entire deal team and probably single-handedly kill a deal.

After slaving for a month on a huge sellside pitch book for the client, two MDs and a director were off to the oh-so important meeting. The associate, two analysts and the intern in question were left at home base to call in and listen in on the call/meeting.

The company was trying to sell itself and had retained our bank as the sole advisor. The CEO/CFO however, were horribly paranoid about not getting screwed over by bankers. They asked the same questions over and over in different formats and probed around every slide "How did you get those numbers? Are you really sure that's a good comp for us? Is that too much equity to use? How does it look with 100% cash?"

Anyways, this obviously turned the meeting into a 3+ hour affair. The analysts had told him that he should listen in but mute his phone and also that since he had pulled a lot of late nights, he could just go home and sleep. The intern however, didn't believe the analysts and thought he should be alert on the call just in case someone important asked him a question on the call.

After a few boring hours, the intern with his aforementioned diarrhea just couldn't take it anymore.

Hilarity ensued.

His sense of self importance prevented him from simply putting down the headset. He took it with him and kept it off mute. I don't have to provide details on the rest, but the sounds of diarrhea shitting was conveyed to the entire deal team and client (their entire management team and a bunch of lawyers/accountants too).

The hilarious thing is that no one even said anything. If you've ever been on one of these calls, you know that even if the client's inaudible, or reception is bad, or you hear the standard kid crying in the background, everyone ignores it and stays silent.

After literally about 60 seconds of pure shitting/farting sounds, the client had heard enough. Suddenly a booming voice interrupts the MD's pitch of interlopers and you hear, "WHO THE FUCK IS TAKING A SHIT?!?!?!?"

Then there was a scrambling of voices, including someone saying "can you.....*scramble* mute..*scramble* your phone*"

Then there was a long silence and the call was dropped. Apparently the client decided to continue the rest of the meeting live and shut out everyone who had dialed in.

Unfortunately, the client shortly lost his will to continue. The CEO/CFO decided to take a break and the meeting only went on for about 30 minutes longer. The MDs and VP were PISSED as they came back to the office, emailing the associate/analyst to figure out who the hell it was.

Luckily, only the analysts knew this story and though our group was well known for being a sweatshop and having a fratty culture, in the end it was still analysts vs. everyone else. No one ratted out the intern and he was able to keep his job.

However, from now on, we're not allowed to take our headsets ANYWHERE away from our desks and most summer interns are required to mute their phones on calls to clients.

I'm sure there are thousands of other stories out there, and I have a dozen or so more myself, but figured I'd get this started and everyone else can share their memorable moments in banking.

See my WSO Blog

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Tags:
  • investment
  • stories
  • interns
  • Hilarious
  • Banking
  • Funny
  • analysts

Comments

Going Concern's picture

hahahaha, +1

Going Concern
     
 
 
(King Kong, 1,702
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 12:52pm

hahahaha, +1

And I think it's gonna be a long, long, time

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oliver13's picture

Sounds almost unreal. The

oliver13
      RE
 
(Senior Baboon, 209
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 12:54pm

Sounds almost unreal. The intern had to be totally daft to take the headset to the shitter. I can't even imagine how pissed the senior bankers were. Hilarious!

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AndyLouis's picture

hilarious story, thanks for

AndyLouis
     
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 5,824
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 1:03pm

hilarious story, thanks for sharing. encore encore

WSO's COO (Chief Operating Orangutan) | My story | Connect with me on Linkedin.

2013 WSO Conference

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WallStreetOasis.com's picture

so classic. amazing this is

WallStreetOasis.com
      EN
 
 
(Human, 12,074
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 1:08pm

so classic. amazing this is true.

WSO Conference 2013

Private Certified User Chat

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BTbanker's picture

Funniest thing I've read in

BTbanker
      IB
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 5,336
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 1:13pm

Funniest thing I've read in my life.

Please share the dozens of other stories.

"A man generally has two reasons for doing anything. One that sounds good, and the real one." - J.P. Morgan

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leveragealltheway's picture

hahaha great story! Mine's

leveragealltheway
      CF
 
(Senior Baboon, 239
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 1:20pm

hahaha great story! Mine's not quite as hilarious but this happened during my summer internship at a BB. First assignment I am given.

VP: "Here is a floor plan of the 3 floors that are ours"
Me: "Uh ok..."
VP: "You need to make sure you scour every inch of every single one of these floors and mark down any stains in the carpeting on this floor plan"
Me: "You're kidding right?"
VP: "Do I look like I'm kidding?"

Took me 2 hours but I walked up and down the hallways staring at the floor with a floor plan and pen in hand. Needless to say I got tons of odd looks and for a few weeks people on the other floors though I was some kind of janitor who took his job way too seriously wearing a button down and tie.

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts." - Bertrand Russell

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SirTradesaLot's picture

It doesn't matter how old you

SirTradesaLot
     
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 4,520
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 1:47pm

It doesn't matter how old you get, stories involving shit always deliver. Solid story, well, not actually solid, but you know what I mean.

Turbo leverage for capital explosion -- BD Capital

My WSO Blog

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DontMakeMeShortYou's picture

One year we had this

DontMakeMeShortYou
      HF
 
 
(King Kong, 1,964
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 1:55pm

One year we had this absolutely phenomenal intern - arguably the best we'd had in a few years. He was brilliant, nice, down to earth, put together, and just got shit done. He was allowed to work without analyst supervision within a few weeks of starting his internship.

Fast forward to a party 2-3 weeks before the end of the summer. Kid gets completely smashed, but then has to go back to the office. Somehow ends up getting his work done and goes home. How he did that, I still don't know.

Anyway, the next morning we smell this stench coming from the coat closet as we pass by it. Turns out that in his inebriated state he had taken a piss there the night before. Thankfully (1) he was an amazing intern (2) the group head had been forcing shots down this kid's throat and wouldn't let him say no and (3) no one was really using the coat closet given the season. He got an offer, came back, and crushed it as analyst as well. I think he's over at a hedge fund now.

See my WSO Blog

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yeahright's picture

Awesome^

yeahright
      O
 
 
(King Kong, 1,100
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 2:04pm

Awesome^

Frank Sinatra - "Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy."

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leveragealltheway's picture

Jeez monkey shit for telling

leveragealltheway
      CF
 
(Senior Baboon, 239
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 2:17pm

Jeez monkey shit for telling what I thought was a mildly amusing story...rough crowd

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts." - Bertrand Russell

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wolverine19x89's picture

stories about poop and pee

wolverine19x89
      O
 
(King Kong, 1,845
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 2:21pm

stories about poop and pee never get old for some reason

If your dreams don't scare you, then they are not big enough.

"There are two types of people in this world: People who say they pee in the shower, and dirty fucking liars."-Louis C.K.

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Going Concern's picture

leveragealltheway: Jeez

Going Concern
     
 
 
(King Kong, 1,702
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 2:29pm
leveragealltheway:

Jeez monkey shit for telling what I thought was a mildly amusing story...rough crowd

Here is a silver banana to offset some of the poo. Some people on here are animals. Fwiw, I thought your story was slightly funnier than the coat closet story, but that had slightly better delivery. Execution is key!

And I think it's gonna be a long, long, time

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monty09's picture

I have some great intern

monty09
      EN
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 5,405
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 2:37pm

I have some great intern stories but cant share... haha

WSO Conf - June 29, 2013

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Bonus's picture

When you fart to ease yer

Bonus
     
 
(Monkey, 61
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 2:48pm

When you fart to ease yer poop, but yer ass goes SHOOP DA WHOOP!&^@%, diarrhea.

Diarrhea.

Colourful TV, colourless Life.

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BTbanker's picture

Bonus: When you fart to ease

BTbanker
      IB
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 5,336
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 2:53pm
Bonus:

When you fart to ease yer poop, but yer ass goes SHOOP DA WHOOP!&^@%, diarrhea.

Diarrhea.

No thx. I already ate.

"A man generally has two reasons for doing anything. One that sounds good, and the real one." - J.P. Morgan

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AlsatianCousin's picture

SirTradesaLot: It doesn't

AlsatianCousin
     
 
(Senior Baboon, 210
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 3:13pm
You must be signed in to read advice below.
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Connecting helps us build a vibrant community. We'll never share your info without your permission.

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ladubs111's picture

plz keep the stories coming

ladubs111
      IA
 
(Senior Orangutan, 432
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 3:43pm
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Unforseen's picture

monty09: I have some great

Unforseen
     
 
 
(King Kong, 1,099
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 3:47pm

Check out my Blog

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johnwayne7's picture

Not an IBD tale, but that

johnwayne7
     
 
(Senior Monkey, 83
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 11:08pm
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kyleyboy's picture

Reminds me of a time...when a

kyleyboy
      HF
 
(Gorilla, 741
 
Points)
 on 12/6/12 at 11:56pm

I help people with the tough situation of not knowing how to respond to emails.

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SirTradesaLot's picture

AlsatianCousin: SirTradesaL

SirTradesaLot
     
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 4,520
 
Points)
 on 12/7/12 at 12:06am

Turbo leverage for capital explosion -- BD Capital

My WSO Blog

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Marcus_Halberstram's picture

Call me a skeptic, not buying

Marcus_Halberstram
      PE
 
 
(Neanderthal, 3,438
 
Points)
 on 12/7/12 at 12:47am

Financial Modeling Training
Guide to Finance Interviews
Banking Resume

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JPMortgage's picture

Last week I was waiting for

JPMortgage
     
 
(Baboon, 160
 
Points)
 on 12/7/12 at 1:36am

"If it were easy, everyone would do it"

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jmdude's picture

One of my good friends was

jmdude
      ST
 
(Orangutan, 301
 
Points)
 on 12/7/12 at 5:07am
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rajpbt's picture

My story isn't from IB, but

rajpbt
     
 
(Baboon, 117
 
Points)
 on 12/7/12 at 6:35am
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SanityCheck's picture

Marcus_Halberstram: Call me a

SanityCheck
      PE
 
 
(Gorilla, 633
 
Points)
 on 12/7/12 at 8:16am

See my WSO Blog

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BankingWaffle's picture

I banged a fellow offeree at

BankingWaffle
      IB
 
(Senior Baboon, 242
 
Points)
 on 12/7/12 at 9:44pm

Cheers.

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roberosas's picture

hahaha awesome story

roberosas
     
 
(Chimp, 1
 
Points)
 on 12/8/12 at 3:25pm
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rufiolove's picture

johnwayne7: Not an IBD tale,

rufiolove
      IB
 
 
(Neanderthal, 3,408
 
Points)
 on 12/8/12 at 3:31pm

1/2 of the WSO Bash Brothers
"Licensed to Ill It"
We all know Bro J did it...

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SirTradesaLot's picture

rufiolove: johnwayne7: Not

SirTradesaLot
     
 
 
(Senior Neanderthal, 4,520
 
Points)
 on 12/8/12 at 3:41pm

Turbo leverage for capital explosion -- BD Capital

My WSO Blog

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mrb87's picture

I suck at telling stories but

mrb87
      PE
 
 
(Senior Orangutan, 484
 
Points)
 on 12/8/12 at 4:26pm
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johnwayne7's picture

rufiolove: So she taught 10

johnwayne7
     
 
(Senior Monkey, 83
 
Points)
 on 12/10/12 at 11:36am
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rufiolove's picture

johnwayne7: rufiolove: So

rufiolove
      IB
 
 
(Neanderthal, 3,408
 
Points)
 on 12/10/12 at 11:41am

1/2 of the WSO Bash Brothers
"Licensed to Ill It"
We all know Bro J did it...

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  •  
yeahright's picture

rajpbt: My story isn't from

yeahright
      O
 
 
(King Kong, 1,100
 
Points)
 on 12/10/12 at 12:04pm

Frank Sinatra - "Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy."

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johnwayne7's picture

rufiolove: johnwayne7: ru

johnwayne7
     
 
(Senior Monkey, 83
 
Points)
 on 12/10/12 at 1:23pm
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ocpitmaster's picture

A LONG time ago, worked in an

ocpitmaster
      EN
 
(Monkey, 34
 
Points)
 on 12/10/12 at 2:22pm
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rajpbt's picture

rufiolove: johnwayne7: Not

rajpbt
     
 
(Baboon, 117
 
Points)
 on 12/11/12 at 6:14am
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EtherBinge's picture

How'd this topic die out?

EtherBinge
      HF
 
 
(Orangutan, 306
 
Points)
 on 2/3/13 at 11:09pm
  • 0
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THE WEB SITE AND MATERIAL ARE PROVIDED ON AN "AS IS" BASIS WITHOUT ANY WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND. THE COMPANY, TO THE FULLEST EXTENT PERMITTED BY LAW, DISCLAIMS ALL WARRANTIES, WHETHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING THE WARRANTY OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND NON-INFRINGEMENT. THE COMPANY MAKES NO WARRANTIES ABOUT THE ACCURACY, RELIABILITY, COMPLETENESS, OR TIMELINESS OF THE MATERIAL, SERVICES, SOFTWARE, TEXT, GRAPHICS, AND LINKS.

Disclaimer of Consequential Damages.

IN NO EVENT SHALL THE COMPANY, ITS SUPPLIERS, OR ANY THIRD PARTIES MENTIONED ON THE WEB SITE BE LIABLE FOR ANY DAMAGES WHATSOEVER (INCLUDING, WITHOUT LIMITATION, INCIDENTAL AND CONSEQUENTIAL DAMAGES, LOST PROFITS, OR DAMAGES RESULTING FROM LOST DATA OR BUSINESS INTERRUPTION) RESULTING FROM THE USE OR INABILITY TO USE THE WEB SITE AND THE MATERIAL, WHETHER BASED ON WARRANTY, CONTRACT, TORT, OR ANY OTHER LEGAL THEORY, AND WHETHER OR NOT THE COMPANY IS ADVISED OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES.

Links to Other Sites.

The Web Site may contain links to third party web sites. These links are provided solely as a convenience to you and not as an endorsement by the Company of the contents on such third-party Web sites. The Company is not responsible for the content of linked third-party sites and does not make any representations regarding the content or accuracy of materials on such third party Web sites. If you decide to access linked third party Web sites, you do so at your own risk.

No Resale or Unauthorized Commercial Use.

You agree not to resell or assign your rights or obligations under these Term of Use. You also agree not to make any unauthorized commercial use of the Web Site.

Limitation of Liability.

The aggregate liability for the Company to you for all claims arising from the use of the Materials is limited to $1.

Termination.

The Company reserves the right, at its sole discretion, to pursue all of its legal remedies, including but not limited to immediate termination of your registration with or ability to access the Web Site and/or any other service provided to you by the Company, upon any breach by you of these Terms and Conditions or if the Company is unable to verify or authenticate any information you submit to the Web Site registration with or ability to access the Web Site.

Indemnity.

You agree to defend, indemnify, and hold harmless the Company, its officers, directors, employees and agents, from and against any claims, actions or demands, including without limitation reasonable legal and accounting fees, alleging or resulting from your use of the Material or your breach of the terms of these Terms and Conditions. The Company shall provide notice to you promptly of any such claim, suit, or proceeding and shall assist you, at your expense, in defending any such claim, suit or proceeding.

General.

The Company makes no claims that the Materials may be lawfully viewed or downloaded outside of the United States. Access to the Materials may not be legal by certain persons or in certain countries. If you access the Web Site from outside of the United States, you do so at your own risk and are responsible for compliance with the laws of your jurisdiction. These Terms and conditions are governed by the internal substantive laws of the State of New York, without respect to its conflict of laws principles. Jurisdiction for any claims arising under this agreement shall lie exclusively with the state or federal courts within New York, New York. If any provision of these Terms and Conditions are found to be invalid by any court having competent jurisdiction, the invalidity of such provision shall not affect the validity of the remaining provisions of these Terms and Conditions, which shall remain in full force and effect. No waiver of any term of these Terms and Conditions shall be deemed a further or continuing waiver of such term or any other term. Except as expressly provided in additional terms of use for areas of the Web Site a particular "Legal Notice," or Software License or Material on particular Web pages, these Terms and Conditions constitute the entire agreement between you and the Company with respect to the use of Web Site. No changes to these Terms and Conditions shall be made except by a revised posting on this page.

PRIVACY POLICY

The Company recognizes that you are concerned about privacy. We are committed to preserving your privacy and safeguarding your sensitive information. The following statement describes the general information-gathering and usage practices of our sites.

Our staff, contractors, Internet service providers and others involved in this site follow this policy or similarly strict policies regarding your Information.

Disclosure

The Company is committed to fully disclosing our policies regarding the collection, use, maintenance, disclosure and security of personal information obtained from users of our site. The term "personal information" includes a name, address, email address, or any other information which could be used to contact you directly or to identify you personally.

Use and Disclosure Limitations

The Company only uses personal information about its Web site users for specific purposes. We do not share user information with third parties except when we have told users about the disclosures, when we have prior consent, or when required by law.

Use Policy: When the Company gathers personal information from users, we ask for permission first. We also disclose, at the time of collection, how the information will be used by us. Personal information is used for activities such as auto-completion of commonly-used forms and helping us contact you when you solicit information from us.

Disclosure Policy: We do not normally disclose personal information to anyone outside of the Company unless we have previously informed users about the disclosures. However, some data may be used from time to time by outside contractors, including auditors or consultants, to assist us in carrying out necessary financial or operational activities. These uses will be consistent with this privacy policy and all contractors using this potential personal information must agree to safeguard it, to use it only for the authorized purpose, and to return it or destroy it upon completion of the activity.

The Company might be required to disclose personal information in response to a valid legal process such as a subpoena, search warrant or court order.

Although unlikely, it is possible that we may have to make certain disclosures to ensure the security of our Web site, to protect its integrity, or to take precautions against potential liability. In any of these situations, we will take any reasonable steps to limit the scope of the data disclosed.

Web Logs: The Company maintains standard Web logs that record basic information about visitors to our Web site. These logs contain: * The Internet domain from which you came to our Web site. * Your IP address. An IP address is a series of numbers which uniquely identifies your connection to the Internet. Although it is possible in some instances, certain types of IP addresses may be used by interested persons to identify users but we do not attempt to identify users in this way. * The type of browser (e.g., Internet Explorer or Netscape) and operating system (e.g., Windows 98) you use. * The date and time you visited the site, and the pages you saw.

We use Web log information to design our Web site, identify popular features, and in similar ways. We do not try to identify individuals from Web logs or to link Web logs to other user information. However, if someone tries to damage our Web site or use it in an unauthorized or illegal way, we may share Web log information with law enforcement agencies. The Company may provide aggregate information such as the number of users who visit particular pages of the site, or the number of people who link to certain external sites from our site, to other parties.

Changes to Privacy Policy

The Company's features and services will change over time and our information-gathering practices and policies may also change.

While our philosophy of protecting user information from inappropriate uses and disclosures will not change, this policy will be updated occasionally to include any change that materially affects the collection, maintenance, use, or disclosure of personal information.

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  • Hey I'm going to be studying abroad in Stuttgart, Germany this summer (Universitat Hohenheim); and was wondering if anyone knew of any good connections to make or things to do while I'm over there? Anybody know of any IBanks, PE firms, or hedge funds giving a try to reach out to? On a...
    Germany Study Abroad
  • Alright, I have two questions, well one is more so a story, but I would like advice on both. So I reached out to a VP today at a BB, we had an informational interview, and she was refusing to answer my questions. She thought I was conducting an interview, umm, it's called an INFORMATIONAL...
    Networking HELP Please
  • Hey Everyone, Relocating to Miami from NYC in the near future, can anyone provide some color on the atmosphere there? I'll be living in Brickell, and coming from the West Village/SoHo/NoLita type area, how different will this area be? I'd really appreciate any info on Brickell/Miami in...
    Miami Monkies
  • I have a third round interview with a restructuring advisory firm on Thursday and would love any advice and/or links to help prepare. The interview will consist of a short case study and will test my proficiency in Excel, PowerPoint and ability to contribute to their written deliverables. After...
    RX Case Study Interview Advice
  • If you work in banking - even as an intern - you obviously have access to everything in the IB share drive including the WGLs for all deals going on. Esp. for capital raising deals where there will be many banks working together. Less so or N.A. for M&A deals. Networking is how you lateral...
    Is it wrong or illegal to network off your bank's WGL?
  • I stand here today as living proof that it is possible to find a true 2 bedroom in West Village for $3,000/month total. Before you go freaking out and telling me there's a dead person being eaten by NYC's giant rats in my basement, everything checked out. Did I get absolutely violated by...
    True 2BR in West Village for $3,000-A Success Story
  • Hi, I am now majoring chemical engineering and minoring in finance at one of the top 3 engineering schools. Also, I have a few internship experiences in a top 5 consulting firm and Chevron, and Samsung. I still have two years left. I know I really want to go into banking industry for its...
    Chemical Engineer going into Trading or IBD
  • Hey guys, interviewing tomorrow for a sort of mixed MO/FO position at a fixed income fund (long/short credit, interest rate hedging, etc.) what sort of questions can i expect? I've only ever had IB interviews before so I'm a novice here....
    Fixed Income fund interview tomorrow - need advice!
  • Hi there, I'm a rising sophomore at a top 3 school, and this question concerns my course selection for next semester. I'm a social-sciency person. I'm okay with math but not great nor interested in it. I know that for consulting (or life in general) the more quantitative my...
    How much quant classes to take for consulting?
  • I'm a JD/MBA class of 2015. Both law and mba programs are in the us news top 25 but not many banks recruit on campus. I'm wondering if its possible/likely to get interviews for BB IB (hopefully in NYC but i am nowhere near NYC now) for a SA for summer 2014 by applying through...
    is submitting an application online a black hole?
  • I just finished my freshman year at U of M in LSA. I applied to the business school and will hear whether or not I get in in around a month. I had a 4.0, but my extracurriculars and essays might be a little weak. It seems as though the last few years Ross admissions has been very essay/EC weighted....
    Michigan (Non-Ross)
  • Hi, Looking to get some color about the best way to spend the last week before the exam. As of now I've nearly exhumed all difficult/advanced q-bank questions with an average of 78%. Knocked out 2.5 practice exams and plan on doing another two. What are some of the things you guys did...
    Writing the CFA exam- no work until June 3
  • Listen up all you newly minted college grads. Now that you’re entering the brave, new, depressing world that is life post college, you are probably eager to jump start your cube life and pay down your debts. And <strong>everyone you talk to is gonna offer up their unsolicited sage advice...
    Worst Career Advice for New Grads
  • Anyone know any lenders that still do long term, preferably 10 years, on interest only loans? We have an existing property, with $6 million in debt. I prefer to do I/O for like 5-10 years then have it convertible to amortizing term. I called several banks and many cringed at interest only unless...
    Commercial Interest Only Loans?
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Upcoming Events

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  • Shanghai Happy Hour May 24th Friday 7:30PM - 10:30PM
    May 24 2013 - 7:30am - 10:30am
  • Hong Kong Networking Event - Happy Hour, May 24th, 7:30PM
    May 24 2013 - 7:30pm - 9:30pm
  • New York School of Finance: Summer Session 2013
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  • Financial and Valuation Modeling Seminar (Washington DC)
    Jun 6 2013 - 9:00am - Jun 8 2013 - 5:30pm
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This is the reaction any analyst who has ever worked in banking has when you say you want to leave banking for business school then come back as a post b school associate... <img src="http://epicpinterestfail.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/how-i-met-your-mother-barney-why.gif"...
Why You DON'T Leave Banking for B School Just to Come Right Back...
I get a ton of emails and answer a ton of posts asking similar questions so I thought I would answer the most common ones I get here and allow others to post their questions so everyone can see them and the subsequent answers. Hope this helps. <strong>Summer Analyst...
MSF Question and Answer
Inspired by comments from this: http://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/basic-guide-ramping-up-on-a-company-with-public-information-part-1-of-3 Lets just jump in. <strong>Technology:</strong> In this space there are really two metrics that matter the most, sales growth and EPS...
Beginners Guide to Valuation and Metrics By Sector
I'm currently a Private Equity Analyst in Shanghai, China. Academically, I graduated from a target school majoring in Economics and Chinese. I also spent my time at college as the president of an on-campus student organization related to Finance and Economics and a volunteer for a local...
Ask me anything… I'm a Private Equity Analyst in Shanghai
For better or for worse, there’s a very unique feeling when everything goes completely according to plan yet nobody seems to care or notice. Such is the case with our favorite company of the moment, Tesla Motors. For those unaware, TSLA has rocketed upwards since its Q1 earnings release,...
A Perfect Storm
I work as a long/short equity analyst at a large hedge fund. I've been lucky enough to be more than just a model monkey early on in my career, but have also been exposed to the stress of being measured on returns. I primarily cover consumer and TMT names. I went the typical path (target...
I'm a Hedge Fund Analyst - Ask Me Anything
Fellow Primates, We are looking for 1-2 students on each campus to help WSO in its sales efforts to student clubs/career centers, and overall promotion at your school both online and on the ground. Below is a description of the position and benefits...thanks in advance for your help! <a...
WSO is Looking for Campus Reps For Summer/Fall 2013 (and beyond)
<em>Mod note: Best of Bankerella - this was originally posted 10/1/12</em> I occasionally get PMed by people at colleges I’ve never heard of before, asking if they have a shot at IBD. Folks, why IBD? The finance world is broad and varied, and there are a million ways to...
My Biggest Career Mistake to Date: Prestige
This is just fantastic. After sitting through Carl Levin and John McCain spewing a bunch of nonsense about how Apple doesn't pay enough taxes (despite being the #3 taxpaying company in America behind ExxonMobil and Chevron), Rand Paul lit them up about what a travesty it was to blame Apple...
Rand Paul GOES OFF at Apple Hearing
Someone was asking me about this in PM and I wrote a long and detailed reply about what it is like to work in Big 4 and what advice I would give to people thinking about interning / working there. Thought it might be useful for others so my reply is below. Happy to answer any...
Working In Big 4 Audit in London
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