2+ years in IB has made me dread sundays

The classic. Wake up at 10am, missed text from your VP that doesn’t understand finance asking you to “can you email XX the latest model? Offer up a call to discuss recent updates as a courtesy.” Take adderall at 10:15am, load up your shit and head over to the office and be the only one there. My brain is too fried from weed, YouTube, alcohol, and tv over the last 10 years to even dream of getting an once of real work done in the comfort of my home. Chest starts fighting. Associate asks for a pre-call to walk sponsor through the model. Vp calls you twice before the call just to make sure everyone’s aligned. Call takes place. Sponsor gets on acting like a pompous asshole “oh wow, back when I was in IB we even worked Saturdays.” Shut the fuck up bitch. Fuck you. 4 hours of model updates. Excel fucks up because you have 100 nested if statements to build the overly complex model sponsor requested. 1 hour of lost work. Re-do, re-shuffle, adapt. Tell your 3 other deal teams to fuck off you’re too busy to update a DRL.

The worst thing about IB is sponsor deals. And those workstream calls with them at the end the week where it’s like “oh we can push those updates through over the weekend”. Dude. I know analysts work Sundays but no one wears it like a badge of honor. Only MY team can ruin my weekend. Not you you fucking dunce with an MBA.

I hate Sundays.

 

This is why I'm leaving IB ASAP. Tired of being available 24/7 and constantly being a bitch boy who gets shit on from every direction where all I can say is "happy to help, sir" unless I want shitty reviews. 

 
Funniest

Maybe try sobering the fuck up? Of course IB is going to be hard when you're tweaking off adderall everyday. Junkie bum 

 

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