Bad networking experience - MD/Partner - coffee chat - went wrong?

So, I feel pretty bad about a coffee chat networking experience I had with an MD/Partner at a BB. I was connected through a friend and met this person at their office.

I went in with the mindset just to introduce myself/why interested/ get to know the person - not trying to just ask for a referral or whatever. The person seemed very aloof and seemed like they did not really want to meet with me. The division I know I want to be in is not theirs, S&T vs. IB- and I said I like X division (not their division) very much I think my skills/interests line up with such division a lot better-and I emphasized I liked their firm a lot.

I didn't even get much of a chance to say oh let me tell you about myself (I should have just said that but I am an idiot and f'ed up and was a bit nervous) - told them an abbreviated version-the person was basically just asking me some basic questions...But I told the person i'm open to opportunities at the firm not just one division, but emphasized one as my top and the one I like the most (not their one).

The person seemed to fault me on the basis that I did not come in saying the division I want to be in is their one etc... I did not even ask for a referral or whatever but they called their person in HR while I was sitting in front of them. Nothing was open for an SA...but i'm still young and hoping to get SA for a diff summer. The person also sort of said I should have a clear story and some other stuff to show them etc- but I did and I told them but they kept asking questions regarding suitability in their division- I also did not even really get a chance to say what I wanted because they just started off asking questions. Ultimately, ik it is prob my fault and I should have tried to spin this convo in a better way but idk. Usually in my past experiences chatting with Mds/Partners it is more conversational and getting to know the person-this person did not seem to care about that.

Did I f up? I feel like an idiot and as if I did something wrong. I felt like the chat did not go that well at all. I don't want to lose the person as a contact though but they prob. won't even respond to me now and think I am useless so idk even what to do now. Should I not even try to keep in touch with the person if they are not in the division I want to be in (think as different as person is in IB and I want S&T etc.. Vice versa).

Also- this person did not even have my resume etc... or even asked for it. I also should have been more direct with saying I am hoping to follow up with you in X time is that okay? They sort of mentioned yeah let me know if I can be of help etc... but obv do not know if they meant that vs. just saying.

Advice/thoughts on this would really be appreciated. I want to still try to build a relationship w/ this person.

22 Comments
 
Best Response

If the "chat" went anything like this post, it was probably a clusterfuck.

With that being said, don't sweat it and simply use it as a learning experience. Take some time to review how it went down, recognize areas where you think you can improve (introduction, remaining calm, being more specific about what you want, etc.), and recognize areas where you felt you left a strong impression.

At the end of the day, who knows if you did anything wrong. Maybe he was just an awkward guy and should have facilitated the convo more. Maybe not. I've had a few of uncomfortable encounters in my networking efforts...it just comes with the territory.

The one positive seems to be that he called HR inquiring about any open positions, seemingly to refer you for the spot. Don't over-analyze and keep communication open with him as you say you want to.

Last note: To you, this coffee chat was huge; you probably thought about it for days beforehand and are sweating it days after. To him, his morning shit was probably more important than a chat with a kid. With that being said, realize that you may be putting too much pressure on yourself in these situations. Remember that and it should help you stay calm. It definitely helped me. Best of luck.

 

I would be annoyed if I took time out of my day to talk to a kid who set up a coffee chat to "get to know me" and subsequently took zero interest in what I actually do, blatantly using me as nothing more than a stepping stone to another, quite different part of the firm. If you're only interested in IB, why waste an S&T MD's time? Or vice versa

They also literally called HR and recommended you in front of you and you're still complaining? wtf

Career Advancement Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.8%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.2%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.7%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Morgan Stanley 02 98.8%
  • Evercore 01 98.2%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.6%
  • Banco Santander 01 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.8%
  • Morgan Stanley 05 98.2%
  • JPMorgan No 97.7%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (14) $434
  • Associates (43) $259
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (13) $156
  • 1st Year Analyst (77) $151
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (71) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
4
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
5
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
6
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
7
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
8
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
9
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
10
Jamoldo's picture
Jamoldo
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”