Feels like I got bullied into accepting an offer
Posting for a friend who's not on this forum:
Hi guys, I accepted a middle tier BB offer for SA 2021. I had wanted to be at this firm for a really long time but I can't stop thinking about the way in which I had to accept the offer. They gave me 48 hours to accept. In an hour, I got calls from three people at the firm who had in some way been involved in my process, forcing me to accept. One of them was like you HAVE to give an answer immediately or it'll leave a bad impression on the people at the firm. I had a couple of super days next week (At a top BB and an EB). I go to a school where banks don't recruit actively and I am an international student so I had worked like mad to get all those super days. I wish to have at least been able to attend all of them and then make an informed choice. These super days were already through accelerated recruiting so they weren't able to accommodate my 48 hour timeline and this BB refused to extend the reply deadline. I have been blaming myself ever since. Why did I get scared by their bullying? Why couldn't I pluck up the courage to tell them that I was in final rounds at other places and I'll appreciate an extension by two days? Even if I had done all the super days, I might have ended up going to this BB because I like their culture but now I just feel that I accepted this offer because I allowed myself to be bullied. I was clearly wrong about the culture. Their attitude just doesn't sit right.
I keep telling myself to be grateful (which I am) and to keep an open mind. Worse comes worse, I hate my SA at this bank next year, I can always recruit FT but it seems like FT timelines are even more tricky. I've also started resenting my contacts at this BB. It seems like they don't give a shit about anyone. I had come to look up to them and this is just disappointing. Has anyone been through a similar experience? How did you get over not having dealt with a similar situation more bravely/smartly?
Thank you!
The pendulum has never moved faster in to the favor of the employer, so I am not surprised.
First and foremost... Get the fuck over it. The bank has every right to offer you a job and force your hand on the spot. Frankly, they should do this more often. Do I agree with it entirely? No. Do I selfishly want to shop around in BB/EB la la land and consider my 20 different front office banking offers just like you? Sure. But this is the real world and no you don't get to interview at 75 different jobs and pick from the litter.
I mean come on, listen to yourself for a second. 1) It is a BB (as an intern) 2) You like the culture 3) You networked and established mentors who will vouch for your career 4) You did all this as a non-target with no OCR... Cry us a river. This sounds like a grand f'n slam opportunity.
Now, on the other side of the equation is "grow the up". Easy answer: Accept the offer next time and then reneg on it if you like another one more. F career services, F the employer for putting you on the spot, F being "blacklisted", F em all. It is your career, not theirs. time to learn how to make your own decisions and look out for yourself. No one is out here to do it for you.
At the end of the day you are just having buyers remorse. It is like dating a girl, but always thinking there is someone hotter out there. All this requires is the occasional slap upside the head, chill pill, and enjoying what you got. Have some perspective.
Sincerely, Not the sympathy you were looking for
I don't think OP wants "your sympathy". Being an international student from a non target student myself, I can attest to how challenging it is to land interviews at banks. It just doesn't sit right for a leading, well reputable bank to coerce candidates into accepting offers. While employers definitely have the upper hand in recruiting, candidates should just have as much opportunity to see what's out there and pick what's best for them. OP did say that even if they had gotten offers from other places, they might have ended up going to this bank any way. It wouldn't have changed any thing for the bank if they had given the usual 2 weeks to reply.
Read part two: the answer.
Your post is almost as absurd as OP's. Did you want me to rattle off my "woe is me" checklist of items that attest to how difficult it was for me to land at my BB too? Eye roll. No... Candidates "shouldn't" get anything. If you don't like that banks approach, say no. If you aren't comfortable committing, say no. If you don't like a position after developing full blown "mentors" and making it through the full interview process, say no. You are a grown adult capable of making your own decisions, right?
While you are twiddling your thumbs thinking through which "culture" fits you best, there will be someone else in line ready to do it. Don't get it twisted. Christ, you could put a desk in an elevator at BB and tell an intern to sit in it and most of them would be happy as a clam.
Exactly. This happens every year. Different banks are on different timelines so you have to make decisions. The process isn't fair. Life isn't fair. Guess what the banks aren't going to wait for you to interview at every other bank and wait for your decision. Imagine this from the bank's side. What your basically telling them is hey thanks for the offer but you're not prestigious enough for me so I'm going to keep recruiting in case I potentially get a better offer, at which point I'll ditch you, but if I don't get another offer I wan't you to wait a couple months for me since you're my safety. Also sorry if I leave you waiting and as I try to leverage your offer into other offers your other candidates will be accepting offers which will screw you over and you'll have to run a whole another process and screen more resumes and do another round of interviews now. Any bank will tell you to suck it and they'll offer to one of the hundred other idiot 20 year olds that really wants the job. Grow up. This is how the job search works. Just because you worked hard doesn't mean anything. Get over yourself. So did the majority of the other candidates
This has to be the dumbest post I've ever read. Historic unemployment and a fresh round of layoffs in IB/PE/HF and this dude is complaining about being "bullied into accepting an offer".
As someone at a target with nearly perfect grades and considerable networking but yet to have an interview with an actual person: Accept the fucking offer. You have no idea how good you have it.
I can understand the OP's point. She felt both close to her new colleagues, but now a little betrayed -- she probably heard that two weeks is normal regarding the time given, and was given about 10 percent of that to make up her mind. She's 20 years old, felt pressured and made a decision she might not have made had she had the "regular" amount of time. I think it's normal to have some reflection, regrets and second-thoughts.
Also, to the previous poster, I don't think she should just blithely considering reneging this offer and accepting another. As has been posted on this site numerous times, reneging can have serious consequences, and can (though not always) lead to the student losing both offers.