Friend got me my JPM offer
This post was a bad attempt at a joke. Sorry to anyone this may have inconvenienced. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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If this isn't a troll post, then for the sake of not getting identified I'd remove the company name.
just diverse candidates doing diverse tings
This is BB investment banking. Now pay your unemployed non target friend the base salary to do the job for you while you clip the end year bonus without doing any work. Pure arbitrage.
Only downside is it’s JPM so the end year bonus might be ~15k but the hourly rate will be great.
Dw I gotchu guys (since I already had a screenshot when I sent this to chat shit @ my boy at JPM)
“Hey everyone, recently I received my JPM offer without ever having talked to my firm. I go to a target but decided to pursue very recently so my behavior/technicals aren't great. So I have a friend who looks a lot like me, where you couldn't tell a difference unless you were trying to. I paid my friend 3k to do my hirevue and super day, contingent on him getting me an offer. I didn't come here to boast, but to say it's possible to get into IB by manipulating the whole process. I wish you monkeys the best with your recruiting."
TBD soon if it's a joke or not