Investment Banks as NBA Players
In honor of the NBA Finals, it's time we compared the investment banks to NBA Players:
Goldman Sachs = LeBron James
Qatalyst = Steph Curry
Morgan Stanley = Nikola Jokic
Centerview Partners = Jayson Tatum
Evercore = Kawhi Leonard
Wells Fargo = Joel Embiid
JPMorgan = Damian Lillard
PJT = Kevin Durant
UBS = Luka Doncic
Deutsche Bank = Ja Morant
Houlihan Lokey = Anthony Davis
Baird = Giannis Antetokounmpo
William Blair = DeMar DeRozan
Citi = Kyrie Irving
Raymond James = Jimmy Butler
Piper Sandler = Anthony Edwards
Brown Gibbons Lang = Draymond Green
Nomura = Jeremy Lin
FT Partners = Klay Thompson
Barclays = Jamal Murray
Truist = Trae Young
Stephens = Austin Reaves
BNP Paribas = Franz Wagner
RBC = Pascal Siakam
Fucking terrible list. Not every bank is a super-star. Ex. Truist is Ben Simmons for how ass they are.
That’s honestly the one that I didn’t agree with first but man Simmons is Truist.
Evercore cancels all its pitches and stopped doing deals in 2019?
this list makes no sense and some of the selections are vaguely problematic (eg nomura smh).
/
Congrats on RJ
To be fair, RJ is the only widely known bank headquartered in Florida
please never post again
Where’s CS?
CS = Damar Hamlin
CS = Brittney Griner
What about this list:
LeBron James - Goldman Sachs: LeBron James, like Goldman Sachs, is arguably one of the most recognized names in his field. Both are associated with high performance, remarkable consistency, and have a long history of success. Their influence extends beyond their primary fields, shaping culture and policy.
Kevin Durant - J.P. Morgan Chase: Both Durant and J.P. Morgan Chase are known for their versatility and ability to adapt. Durant's exceptional skills make him a threat from virtually anywhere on the court, just as J.P. Morgan Chase's diversified services make it a strong player in various financial sectors.
Stephen Curry - Morgan Stanley: Stephen Curry revolutionized the game with his shooting, much like Morgan Stanley has often been at the forefront of financial innovation. Both are highly respected and have a knack for setting new trends in their respective fields.
Giannis Antetokounmpo - Barclays: Like Barclays, Antetokounmpo (a.k.a. the "Greek Freak") brings an international flavor to a largely US-centric industry. They both have shown resilience and the ability to compete at the highest level, even when the odds are stacked against them.
Kawhi Leonard - UBS: Both Leonard and UBS are known for their effectiveness and quiet proficiency. Leonard's understated personality and focus on results mirror UBS's reputation for being discreet yet reliable.
Luka Dončić - Deutsche Bank: Luka, like Deutsche Bank, represents a strong European influence within a largely American-dominated field. Both have had their ups and downs, but their talent and potential are undeniable.
Devin Booker - Credit Suisse: Booker and Credit Suisse are younger compared to their peers, but they both have a strong foundation and the potential to become even more influential in the coming years.
Zion Williamson - Jefferies Group: As a relative newcomer to the field, both Zion and Jefferies Group have been rapidly gaining recognition and respect. They are known for their energy, innovation, and potential to disrupt the status quo. Jefferies, though smaller than its Wall Street peers, has been growing its influence in the investment banking sector, much like Zion has been making a name for himself in the NBA.
CJ McCollum - BNP Paribas: Not necessarily the first name that comes to mind when you think of superstars/banks, but they have been consistently solid and reliable, performing at a high level and providing value.
De'Aaron Fox - RBC Capital Markets: While not as internationally recognized as others on this list, both Fox and RBC Capital Markets excel in their niches and have the capacity to surprise the bigger names with their performance and growth.
I ain’t reading allat but you got way too much free time
I dont understand why ppl post comments using chat GPT. Like whats the point?
I would think Jimmy Butler and Jefferies make a lot of sense. Both have a reputation for being super scrappy and punching above their weight. Can rub people the wrong way (see shitty culture in the HC group and how the Timberwolves speak about Jimmy). At the end of the day are you taking Butler over Giannis or Doncic or Durant or Jokic? Nah, but they can still get you more than what you expected. Just my 2¢
Haha dude Credit Suisse is Tony Parker
Straight up ChatGPT copy and paste
Trash list
I feel like I could get a better output if I asked ChatGPT to do this.
So Wells Fargo bankers whine to the media when they don't get deals, and when they do get them, they can't close?
I would argue JPM should be Lebron James because its like the best overall bank, if you take commercial banking into account and its systemic importance to the banking network. Furthermore, you could measure systemic importance by plus minus. Lebron's plus minus is much higher than Jordans for example. Goldman should be like MJ. As Goldman's rival, MS would probably have to be Kobe. Also this prestige list clearly suffers from recency bias. For EB's that have a niche sector where they are the best in, I think you need to find a player who is insanely good at one aspect and average in others. So like Qatalyst would have to be like Steph Curry, as a sharp shooter. SVB could be like Lonzo Ball, had a bright future but ultimately fell off into irrelevance. Al Horford could be credit suisse, had pretty good stats, made all star 5 times, but now is a former shell of himself and has gone through a reorg to be used as a three point shooter to spread the floor. Patrick Beverley would be FT Partners.
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