Really awkward M.D. situtation... opinion?

Alright, so I just got an internship at a small boutique MM IB (4-6 bankers). The MD was the person I really networked with and built a good base. However, he seems to always be angry with all his other associates/analysts but resoundingly always treats me like the good' ol boy. I feel unusual talking to him anyways but on the top floor where we work we have one bathroom with one urinal and one toilet.

Yesterday, I go to the urinal and dish the petri. There was also someone in the toilet. My MD walks in and I assume realizes both spots are taken. I though, don't know it was him. He then proceeds to tap me on the shoulder while i'm pissing and says "you done there boy?!" and I in shock, jump and piss myself. I finish up and the MD looked at me. He then says...

"I have spare pants..." Today he, with clear intention, avoided me all day.

18 Comments
 
thatsracistpee all over the pants he loans you

poop in them too

Here's the thing. If you can't spot the sucker in the first half hour at the table, you are the sucker.
 

Did he see your unit? Maybe he thinks "lesser" of you now... I mean, he hired you perhaps thinking one day you could become a BSD. Maybe he no longer sees that potential in you...

-philly g
 
Best Response

hahah this is great.

I have a somewhat awkward story as well...One of the urinals on my old floor was broken or something, the sensor would flicker and the urinal would just flush while you're pissing (splashing water/piss all over your unsuspecting pants). One day, the other 2 urinals were taken and I ended up with the retarded one (I thought maybe they fixed it). Several seconds later, after the bathroom has cleared out, the little red light flickers and I hear the water rushing up the pipes. Using my cheetah reflexes, I fcking leap back a good 5 feet, with my dck still in my hand...right as one of the head traders walks in. We looked at each other with long deep stares, I didn't know what to do as I'm still in the same vulnerable position. I slowly tuck my sh*t in and proceed to wash my hands. It's been 7 months, we haven't made eye contact since.

Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. From men into gladiators. And from gladiators into SWANSONS.
 
Flakehahah this is great.

I have a somewhat awkward story as well...One of the urinals on my old floor was broken or something, the sensor would flicker and the urinal would just flush while you're pissing (splashing water/piss all over your unsuspecting pants). One day, the other 2 urinals were taken and I ended up with the retarded one (I thought maybe they fixed it). Several seconds later, after the bathroom has cleared out, the little red light flickers and I hear the water rushing up the pipes. Using my cheetah reflexes, I fcking leap back a good 5 feet, with my dck still in my hand...right as one of the head traders walks in. We looked at each other with long deep stares, I didn't know what to do as I'm still in the same vulnerable position. I slowly tuck my sh*t in and proceed to wash my hands. It's been 7 months, we haven't made eye contact since.

Hahaha
 
Flakehahah this is great.

I have a somewhat awkward story as well...One of the urinals on my old floor was broken or something, the sensor would flicker and the urinal would just flush while you're pissing (splashing water/piss all over your unsuspecting pants). One day, the other 2 urinals were taken and I ended up with the retarded one (I thought maybe they fixed it). Several seconds later, after the bathroom has cleared out, the little red light flickers and I hear the water rushing up the pipes. Using my cheetah reflexes, I fcking leap back a good 5 feet, with my dck still in my hand...right as one of the head traders walks in. We looked at each other with long deep stares, I didn't know what to do as I'm still in the same vulnerable position. I slowly tuck my sh*t in and proceed to wash my hands. It's been 7 months, we haven't made eye contact since.

Amazing story!

absolutearbitrageur.blogspot.com
 

Consequatur autem commodi ut pariatur perferendis. Repudiandae non dolorum ab. Aut et quia quia delectus soluta.

Rerum in dignissimos qui et est rerum ipsam est. Itaque exercitationem expedita voluptatum voluptatem vel mollitia. Quae aut nihil omnis voluptas neque rem. Inventore facere numquam ea. Qui ipsa doloremque qui.

Quaerat sapiente aspernatur non distinctio. Cum earum ratione corrupti labore quia quia. Inventore ullam cumque illo temporibus ad aut. Similique voluptatum dolorem qui sunt molestiae dolor harum.

Fugiat et sed vel assumenda fugit eligendi eius. Quidem eveniet omnis quis. Officia non perspiciatis quasi cumque. Itaque perspiciatis aut sed est facilis qui est sit. Quo et animi at consequatur. Est vel et aut distinctio exercitationem iusto.

"Have you ever tried to use a chain with 3 weak links? I have, and now I no longer own an arctic wolf." -Dwight Schrute

Career Advancement Opportunities

May 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.8%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.2%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.7%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

May 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Morgan Stanley 01 98.8%
  • Evercore 01 98.2%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.6%
  • Banco Santander 01 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

May 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Evercore No 98.8%
  • Morgan Stanley 05 98.2%
  • JPMorgan No 97.7%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

May 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (14) $434
  • Associates (43) $259
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (13) $156
  • 1st Year Analyst (75) $151
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (65) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
4
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
5
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
6
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
7
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
8
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
9
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
10
Mimbs's picture
Mimbs
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”