Shitting on the Job?

I have gathered that you are not supposed to be away from your desk for longer than 5 minutes at time. My body is fucked up and I shit three times a day on average, and piss like crazy. Is this going to negatively effect me? This is serious and not a shit post. Is it normal to have a piss bottle by the desk? I can resort to that if it makes it less obvious how much I use the restroom. 

Asking for advice, I am worried about how my shit tendencies will look to my superiors. 

Comments (53)

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1y 
Kawhi Anthony Leonard, what's your opinion? Comment below:
This is serious and not a shit post. Is it normal to have a piss bottle by the desk?  

Good one OP

I’m a fun guy. Obviously I love the game of basketball. I mean there’s more questions you have to ask me in order for me to tell you about myself. I'm not just gonna give you a whole spill... I mean, I don't even know where you're sitting at

1y 
Jerome Powell, what's your opinion? Comment below:

"this is not a shit post,"...

Post is literally about shit

  • 8
1y 
thebrofessor, what's your opinion? Comment below:

if you want to end up like limousine liberal mike bloomberg, you don't ever take bathroom breaks: https://au.finance.yahoo.com/news/michael-bloomberg-weird-tip-for-success-000153007.html

if, however, you want to be in touch with reality, you listen to your body. if it's not some condition that's been irreversible with diet and medication and they ask, I'm sure they'd understand. however if you're shitting that often, I'm betting your gut has inflammation so I'd play with your diet a bit to try to reverse that

1y 
420 Hedger, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Don't take any shit from anyone. If someone tries to pressure you into not using the bathroom, remind them how shitty their shitbox personality is. Those shitheads don't understand the bullshit your horseshit of a shitty body has to offer. Don't be a dipshit and shit yourself acting like a complete shitface.

Array
1y 
Kawhi Anthony Leonard, what's your opinion? Comment below:

MD found the piss drawer. What do I do bros?

I’m a fun guy. Obviously I love the game of basketball. I mean there’s more questions you have to ask me in order for me to tell you about myself. I'm not just gonna give you a whole spill... I mean, I don't even know where you're sitting at

  • 5
1y 
BigKahunaBanker🏄🍹🍔, what's your opinion? Comment below:

>mfw WSO gets slowly turned into my favourite Tibetan Underwater-basket-weaving forum

...and the Truth shall set you free
  • 2
1y 
IncomingIBDreject, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Why do I feel this is a real picture of your bathroom not something you found online.

Array

  • 3
  • Intern in IB - Cov
1y 

incoming SA with IBS here. You have your phone with you, so you're always available if someone pings you. You can also take the extra time on the toilet to respond to non-urgent emails, read up on market news, and handle personal stuff.

  • Intern in IB-M&A
1y 

Same here. I need coffee in IBS, but I always run to the bathroom whenever taking caffeine...

Any tips?

  • Incoming Analyst in IB-M&A
1y 

a few of my buddies are coming to the office with adult diapers, so they can stay at their desk all day long. Might want to check it out

1y 
69savage, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Try to time your shits so that they usually don't get in the way of important things. If you have to shit three times a day, then try to shit once before work, once around lunch, and once before you sleep.

1y 
Wasted Chimp, what's your opinion? Comment below:

^^This. Also, if you keep a shit log, you can time them and try to beat your personal best! Become more efficient every day.

1y 
Wasted Chimp, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Lol imagine having to shit while your MD is yelling at you. I think that would be funny

1y 
kimchi_nabe, what's your opinion? Comment below:

imagine peeing in the piss bottle xd

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
1y 

Good shit post. Maybe not in the traditional sense of the word, but the post is about shit.

1y 
Mesutozil10, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Wso becomes more and more like 4chan every day lol

1y 
CorpFinStudent, what's your opinion? Comment below:

At the bank I was at, I have unfortunately witnessed folks from associate to MD level go into a stall and blow it up... while on calls (clients, teams, etc.). At first I was just like what the fuck, but I became desensitized to it over time. I would never do that shit but I empathize with people who are just slammed with back-to-backs that can't be moved, but they have to drop the kids off at the pool. Sometimes doody calls and it is what it is.

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
1y 

Est nesciunt est modi soluta. Eveniet recusandae saepe hic voluptates ut tenetur veritatis.

1y 
blookup, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Quibusdam sunt eos iusto fuga et iure modi. Debitis itaque fuga quo sed quis.

Nostrum sit distinctio cum dolores. Et excepturi et explicabo a. Architecto ratione est numquam nihil ex amet. Eius ut ut quidem commodi. Possimus omnis consequatur natus placeat explicabo.

Aut ad dolor omnis adipisci ea. Et ipsam repellendus enim modi. Accusamus eius asperiores non. Doloribus qui rerum velit. Nihil quia sequi aut cum nemo.

Pariatur neque veritatis fuga nihil excepturi vero. Mollitia quis amet porro excepturi quia. Mollitia aut et asperiores ullam nostrum impedit. Adipisci quia quo natus.

1y 
OneNaiveMonkey, what's your opinion? Comment below:

Repellat incidunt earum exercitationem. Blanditiis voluptas fugit deleniti molestiae tempore saepe. Quis atque repellendus laboriosam qui dicta sint.

Omnis corporis itaque consequatur et labore ea id. Sit facere quasi perspiciatis et. Recusandae odit et ullam iste omnis.

Sit itaque harum eum voluptates mollitia tempore. Quod quam dolore dolorem ratione quasi autem.

Dolorum dolorem sapiente nobis cumque et sequi fuga. Nihil similique eaque hic voluptas facilis in eius. Facere aliquam iure eum aperiam sunt dolorem. Et non officia modi ab. Consequatur voluptatem voluptatem modi voluptatem voluptates. Aut pariatur ut voluptatem.

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