Cold Email Advice (Search Fund Summer Internship)

Hi guys, I'm a high school senior (uncommitted but I have pretty nice offers) and I'm thinking of trying to land an internship over the summer. I think I'll mainly target search funds and I've tried to make a cold email template. I was wondering if I could receive any comments/criticism on it (also, should I just be emailing whoever runs the search fund directly and should I be looking at anything besides search funds?) Thanks!

Hi Name,

My name's Name and I'm an incoming freshman at [school—is it okay to just say this since I don't want to get into the semantics of maybe picking a different one]. I found your contact information through (source) and noticed that your search fund (personalized statement). I'm interested in a career in M&A and I'm looking for ways to gain exposure to the field. 

I wanted to reach out to see if you have a few minutes to discuss your experiences at [xyz company] and [specific to firm]. I understand that you're likely busy, and I'd be more than happy to work around your schedule.

Best,

Name

Should I be more direct about wanting an unpaid internship + how should I go about making the subject line and is there anything else I should know?