So you're sayin' there's a chance!

step 1. stop being a lazy fuck step 2. see step 1

step 1. see above post step 2. sign up for the next season of tool academy

"and sounds as desperate as possible"

Unemployed - non-target- 3.4 GPA..You are as desperate as possible

I think you guys got leveled

i hope this is a fucking joke, but mickie d's is constantly hiring.

for someone with a "very high iq," you seem to be doing well living with your parents and working at wal-mart.

Dude, if you're being straight up, you'd fucking hate banking. HATE IT.

You've never been around so many entitled, Type-A asshats as you would be if you somehow got hired. You'd blow yourself out the first week. It seems you have a clear sense of ROI, and enough smarts to know that selling 4,335 hours of your life in a year for $80,000 is a dipshit move.

Go start a company.

@whateverittakes - "rocket surgery" sounds like something that may be required after a "bender in AC"

What has "drawn" you to finance? Is it the lifestyle (post-making dinero)? If so, you can make money doing other stuff. Have you found success in poker? Maybe treat poker more like a job rather than something you do while getting f'ed up in AC.

I agree with Edmundo. Find something you're interested in. Banking takes up a lot of time, but so does starting your own company. As long as you're doing something you like, the hours won't matter. Since you've shown no actual interest in finance maybe it's not the place for you to make your money.

At least he was honest.

Sure doesn't sound like you're as smart as you think. You may be book smart, but working in finance and banking is a lot more about motivation and drive, of which you clearly have neither. Don't waste your time. You better start networking, because what you bring to the table on paper is shit.

why would you even put yourself through ib if youre not motivated or driven? like i cant imagine a worse place for lazy people to be at

Haha, I love this guy:D keep doing what you're doing, maybe you'll get your shot and then you'll find out if banking is for you. Who knows...

hahaha wow, you seem like the tyoe of dude i would want to hang out with

fuckin hoodrat stuff brah

how the hell do you have surgery on a rocket?

I think rocket-surgery joke is from the movie - The Boondock Saints II. I will not admit that I have actually watched the movie :-|

Edmundo,

Thanks for the honest advice. You've confirmed my suspicions. I've been under the - likely false - assumption that the money and pressure would motivate me to stick with it.

I have one more interview then I'm out of the game for awhile. I'll go work in industry. I'd still appreciate any advice that would help me ace this last interview though. Who knows, maybe I'll get the offer, hate the job, and do something hilarious when I decide its time to get fired. I think the WSO readers might appreciate a good story.

Darwin,

The question "What has drawn you to finance?" has been a sticking point in all of my interviews to date (it's the reason I wrote the post). Originally I considered banking as a way to make connections for when I eventually do start my own business (i.e. access to capital). Of course, money and "models and bottles" are also both at the top of the list. Also I know I'm cut out for the type of work - whether or not I'm cut out for the amount of work is an entirely different question, and I now suspect the answer is no. I've been under the assumption that my genuine interest in the companies that work with the banks I've been applying to would translate into interest in the work I'd be doing at a bank. And Its not that I have no interest in banking, its that I have interest in banking for the XYZ industry ONLY (and while I'm sure it involves a lot of the same type of work you'd be doing in any IBD, it also requires more technical knowledge necessary for asset-by-asset analysis, and that shit turns me on, who knows I might even love it).

Here's my big problem in interviews: my selling point (the reason I get interviews in the first place) has been my in-depth knowledge of that bank's industry focus. I get the impression that this makes the interviewer think "does this kid know what he's getting himself into, and does he know we're a bank, not an XYZ company?" I'm sure its not the only reason I'm not getting offers, but I really think its a huge issue, and one that I might have some control over.

As far as professional poker, I make more than enough money to fund my current lifestyle and pad the savings account (which is why I turned down an offer for a solid non-banking job, probably a dumb play, though I'm sure I can get another). However, I get smoked when I move up in stakes. I stick w/ what works for now. Basically I know I could make 50k a year for the rest of my life, but I'm concerned about career advancement (I can't exactly put poker on my resume). Also having so much volatility in my portfolio is okay w/ me while I'm 22 and living at home, but I suspect it wont be when I'm 32. I also don't love it. I look at it as a job now and, aside from the fact that I can work and play on my own schedule, it kind of sucks - very antisocial lifestyle. You're probably thinking to yourself I should consider trading. I have, but I'm not really sure how to break in because no way BB S&T will give me an interview, and all the prop shops I come across seem like scams. Any suggestions as to where I might look?

Sorry for my stream of consciousness writing and going on and on but just to clarify; I think some people might have gotten the impression that I have zero interest in finance because I wrote the comment about "studying the crap..." What I meant was I've studied all the stuff the banks want you to be able to talk about in an interview - I used the word "crap" because I think that that shit, while important, is extremely basic. Having the ability to explain DCF is crap, being able to run a model is not crap. I am interested in the latter (maybe).

Everyone, back to Question 1. Any suggestions?

Bueller... Bueller... Bueller?

Guys like you get caught up in "ZOMG, Must do Investment Banking!!!!"

In reality, based on the personality traits you listed, you are a better fit for Sales- Fixed Income or Equities.

Even at the BBs, you can sweet talk your way into sales. Just know that being lazy is unacceptable everywhere.

I might have to make a new post because I definitely included too much information here and its detracting from my real question, but I'll give it another shot first.

In a final round interview setting, what might a candidate with no prior finance experience say, specifically, to convince an MD that he is passionate about investment banking?

I know actions speak louder than words, but I don't exactly have time to go out and intern before my next interview.

I've considered several different approaches, all of which have significant downsides:

1) Register for the CFA Level 1 and say I'm studying for that. Downside: It costs a g 2) I could say I registered for the CFA. Downside: I'd be lying 3) Say something along the lines of how I just discovered i-banking recently, fell in love, blah blah. Downside: sounds weak, who wants to hire someone that just "stumbled across banking" 4) Say my first love is the industry serviced by the bank I'm applying to, and I've decided that banking is a way to be involved in the big deals that affect the entire industry, global economy, etc. (especially because its a capital intensive industry, intrinsically tied to the markets, etc.) Downside: downplays my interest in banking, which is already in question b/c I have no experience

In the past I've gone w/ #4, which is also how I truly feel, but I think there's a better answer out there. Thoughts?