A Letter of Resignation From theaccountingmajor - it's been real

So for the past several days, I've been getting DMs from the website moderators that my posts have been removed. Can I ask why you all are so angry? I've had so much MS thrown my way, it probably triggered some sort of red-flag. Lol like seriously - every other day, there's some kid who comes on here and asks something either (1) stupid, (2) already answered by 40 other forums, (3) readily available information that a few searches on the web could answer, or (4) all of the above. For example...

Can I round my 3.4 to a 3.5 GPA?

Do I need to know the technicals for IB, or will they teach me?

What are some good schools to look at?

What should I major in?

Is finance a good major to get into finance careers?

You guys are honestly telling me that you'd rather sit here and read these mind-numbingly mundane posts day after day than have a little entertainment? What I brought to this website was a "tell-it-like-it-is" attitude. I had nothing but good intentions; just trying to be funny, make witty back-and-forth with community members, and create new, entertaining, and informative threads for everyone to discuss. In banking, and in life, people aren't going to like everything you do. I accept that. But it's gotten a bit out of hand, with people literally getting angry at me lmao like its an anonymous online forum, calm down dudes. No need to be pouty. So, as I finally take a break (perhaps permanently) from posting, because I'm losing interest and don't have the time or patience to deal with the angry brats on here and having all my posts removed, I leave you with this. Tomorrow, when the inevitable high-school freshman posts something along the lines of

"Long-time lurker, but my end-goal is to break into IB, what GPA should I target, and can you critique my cold-email, and what should I major in, and what is the optimal coffee-chat conversion multiple I should be aiming for..."

Just remember... nothing like that ever came from theaccountingmajor.

And before you all comment that theaccountingmajor is dead, just remember one more thing. It's been said that you die twice: once when you stop breathing, and once when someone says your name for the last time. Based on that, I'll be alive and well on this site for many many moons.

And to my loyal fans, thank you, and congratulations for not being easily-offended wimps, lol.

BTW, if you could all list your best tip for getting girls in the comments section, that'd be great.

Cheers

 
Kassad:
Sayonara. If you'd changed your fucking major like I (we) recommended, this wouldn't be happening.

AND you'd be getting more girls. Fuck, dude. What a waste of talent.

Nonsense, some girls like boring, stable, steady and uninteresting. Normally they live in the midwest, and their idea of kinky in the sack is missionary.

On a more serious note behind statistics, accounting is probably the best major to become an actuary. A kid across the hall from me in an apartment a couple years back was a junior actuary for Ace/Chubb. It seemed like he was making good money because his stoner roommate definately wasn't paying the rent working retail. (the place had two wildly different size bedrooms, one was like a kid's room-9'X9'- I used mine for a home office-guess who had which room there) Actuaries actually make some pretty good bank for a low stress job that can be done in a low cost area. I hear it can be $250k. Granted you stare at excel spreadsheets until you want to gouge your eyes out, but when building a new product I do too. (and FactSet, and Bloomberg, and M*) The difference is that if I build a winner, it can gather a billion dollars in AUM, an actuary just saves the insurance company money in claims.

The only difference between Asset Management and Investment Research is assets. I generally see somebody I know on TV on Bloomberg/CNBC etc. once or twice a week. This sounds cool, until I remind myself that I see somebody I know on ESPN five days a week.
 

Honestly the issue was your comments more than your posts. You really didn't know how to get the "I'm being sarcastic / humorous / witty" feeling through. You also tried a bit too hard to continue the back and forth comment stream.

You should also try to sprinkle some seriousness in between the "troll / meme" heavy posts and comments.

Just some criticism on your way out.

 

I nearly cried when I read this. Rest in peace good sport. Heroes get remembered, but legends never die. theaccountingmajor--a visionary in the wrong age.

Till next time, old friend. I hope you slay more than any of us could possibly imagine. I'll see you on the shores.

Dayman?
 

Officia culpa placeat dolore aut non. Quia facilis hic dolorum necessitatibus. Exercitationem illum error aut quas ea. Qui eveniet eos iure doloremque ex magnam aut ratione. Reiciendis excepturi aliquam sit quos quam fuga illo. Pariatur iste eligendi rerum quis occaecati blanditiis explicabo.

Ratione nobis nihil quidem exercitationem in asperiores. Quia iusto asperiores non quibusdam numquam ducimus sapiente. Similique provident sunt sint velit et.

Assumenda qui aliquid qui officiis ut ipsum. Ab voluptatibus porro quia non. Voluptas incidunt voluptatum aut dolore nihil et ab. Sed ullam nemo nam. Omnis ut dolore optio doloribus eaque quis.

Ad expedita magnam id illo. Eius sed itaque voluptates nesciunt occaecati qui. Est quo quidem eum eum placeat neque inventore. Totam earum quisquam aliquam illo quia et. Et ipsum et quia dignissimos fugit rerum et.

in it 2 win it
 

Rerum autem voluptas dolor hic odio ex. Qui eos aut cum placeat.

Aperiam amet harum molestias nihil autem veniam. Unde ducimus nihil dicta. Quia itaque aut fuga pariatur nihil a aut nulla. Doloribus labore incidunt qui aut velit explicabo dolore. Corrupti ab quidem reiciendis facilis quo non accusamus.

Eius necessitatibus et ut id debitis sint rem. Sapiente aut nihil cum id.

Career Advancement Opportunities

May 2024 Investment Banking

  • Jefferies & Company 02 99.4%
  • Goldman Sachs 19 98.8%
  • Harris Williams & Co. New 98.3%
  • Lazard Freres 02 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 04 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

May 2024 Investment Banking

  • Harris Williams & Co. 18 99.4%
  • JPMorgan Chase 10 98.8%
  • Lazard Freres 05 98.3%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.7%
  • William Blair 03 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

May 2024 Investment Banking

  • Lazard Freres 01 99.4%
  • Jefferies & Company 02 98.8%
  • Goldman Sachs 17 98.3%
  • Moelis & Company 07 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 05 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

May 2024 Investment Banking

  • Director/MD (5) $648
  • Vice President (19) $385
  • Associates (88) $260
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (14) $181
  • Intern/Summer Associate (33) $170
  • 2nd Year Analyst (67) $168
  • 1st Year Analyst (205) $159
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (146) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
99.0
4
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
5
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
6
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
7
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
8
kanon's picture
kanon
98.9
9
numi's picture
numi
98.8
10
bolo up's picture
bolo up
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”