Do you guys get intimated seeing pretty females in the office ?

So there's this lady working as a financial analyst, I think she has the most photogenic face and she's quite the cougar. Very pleasant personality. It's not even one of those outright sexy/bombshell faces/bodies - it's that good girl image that softens your heart and she always has a tinge of perfume on. I could just put my face in my palms and gawk at her all day. hmmm. I can never look her in the eye. Melody. What a name my lady. Melody.

 

Don't let a woman intimidate you. Instead, fight back. Leer creepily and awkwardly flirt with her. Get drunk and grope her at the Christmas party. Don't apologize to her face, but instead leave an inappropriate note on her desk with a rose attached to it.

After you've been fired, steal your friend's front desk pass to break back in just so you can get a look at her one more time. When asked what you're doing there, say you forgot something and then start running. Shove the intern in your way. Once you make it to the street and security has been called, try calling her. Oh wait, your number is blocked.

Later, you run into your boss in the locker room (you still belong to the athletic club). You rudely interrupt a conversation he's having with a friend to beg for your job back. You put your arm around his shoulder and try to play up your antics as "boys will be boys". He asks why the fuck you're touching him and then beats the shit out of you. You're thrown out of the club and blacklisted on the Street.

But luckily, your buddy who still works there managed to bang the original woman, and you get to see the drunken snapchat of it.

10/10 totally worth it.

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn
 

vibrams in an office environment. felony record. fired. tatooes in an office environment. now dissing random people after getting married on the internet.

I'd imagine being gay is considerably better than being you.

D.I.
 

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